Ireland’s discount airline RyanAir wants to be known as the “Tesco of the skies.” (Think “flying Walmart.”) The metaphor would apply beautifully if Tesco also charges you a 25 cent unpeeling fee on a 35-cent banana. In the last few years, RyanAir’s “ancillary” revenue, or money raked in from fees, has reached £548 million ($914 million USD).
RyanAir this week announced that they will soon eliminate all airport check-in counters and require passengers to carry-on their luggage. Starting early next year, passengers will need to schlep their bags through airport security and drop them at the steps of the plane for checking into plane’s cargo hold. Once aboard though, there will be gambling!
If the NYT is to be believed, the CEO of Ryanair, one Michael O’Leary, was not kidding when he said that the low cost airline would be installing pay toilets on board their aircraft. In fact, it seems that these hypothetical toilets will be accepting credit cards.
RyanAir’s toilet tax may not be the company’s worst idea after all, as reader Geoffrey reminds us with this mockup showing several potential fees the budget Irish carrier may well be considering.
“Maybe O’Leary was just taking the piss this morning… Michael makes a lot of this stuff up as he goes along and while this has been discussed internally there are no immediate plans to introduce it,” said a RyanAir spokesperson in response to the CEO announcing this morning they were thinking about having coin-operated lavatory doors onboard the aircraft.
Ultra low-cost Irish carrier RyanAir is thinking about putting a coin slot on lavatory doors so passengers will have to pay when they empty their loose change from their coin slot.
So blogger Jason Roe finds what he thinks is an error on the RyanAir site that would let you buy airfare from the zero-frills a-la-carte Irish airline for free. An employee decided t make nasty comments in Jason’s comments section, calling him “idiot and a liar!” and saying that he probably can’t get a date. Which was not that surprising. Nor was it surprising that a RyanAir PR rep responded to the situation. What was surprising was that the PR rep sided with the commenter and heaped further abuse on the blogger!
While American discount airlines like Spirit Air and Southwest alternate between running sophomoric promotions and enforcing their prudish dress codes on passengers, European counterpart Ryanair has trumped them all with its CEO’s announcement that transcontinental business class passengers will receive free “beds and blowjobs.” Video inside (safe for work if your job lets the word “blowjob” be said aloud).
Attention air travelers: If your 3′ long stuffed crocodile is blocking the emergency exit, you are going to need to move it. If you refuse, you’re going to get kicked off the plane.
Watch out whoever owns those ridiculously expensive in-flight phones…Almost half of all airlines plan to offer in-flight mobile phone connectivity for passengers by the end of 2008.
We rarely do anecdotal stuff here, but I thought this was interesting enough to comment on.
Although I personally love RyanAir for allowing me to fly anywhere in Europe practically for free, I’ve known enough people who’ve worked behind the scenes to know it’s a pretty horrific company to work for — or even fly with — if you know what they know. Cheapness, apparently, doesn’t come cheap… it comes with a huge cost in customer service and, more importantly, competence and safety.