(
David Horesh
‏@dhoresh)

Lululemon Tries To Inspire Buffalo Sports Fans, Enrages Them Instead

What does it take to get the attention of an athleticwear company that has offended an entire region? A Twitter campaign, perhaps along with a slow news week. Lululemon installed what they thought was an inspiring mosaic at the entrance to their store in Buffalo, NY. Instead, they learned that dredging up near misses is actually quite upsetting to sports fans. [More]

Lottery Winner Wears A Bright Yellow Bear Costume To Collect $85M Reward, As One Does

Lottery Winner Wears A Bright Yellow Bear Costume To Collect $85M Reward, As One Does

Look around at all the lottery winners you’ve seen on TV in the United States — a smiling person, human in features, not covered in bright fur. We are tamer than tame when compared with the tradition of dressing up in crazy costumes to claim lottery winnings in China, like a guy who just wore a huge, bright yellow bear costume to pick up his check for $85 million. [More]

Cops: Teen Wiped Himself With Cash In The Bathroom, Used It To Pay Restaurant Tab

(C x 2)

While it’s up to you how you waste your money, putting feces on your money and giving it to someone as payment is not only totally disgusting, but also could lead to a charge of “battery by bodily waste.” [More]

A Brief History Of Car Colors — And Why Are We So Boring Now?

stepahndw

You don’t know their names, but you see them everywhere: countless shades of reds, greens, blues, grays, tans, taupes, whites, off-whites, charcoals, blacks, gold and silver. Really what you’re seeing is Vanilla Shake, Tahitian Pearl and Torched Penny. Cars are everywhere, and so are the colors they’re cruising around in, their own distinctive skins. Paint is one of the most important design aspects parts of a car — the right paint job can mean the difference between luxury and sport utility, can turn Grandpa’s jalopy into a teen dream machine, and forever change a car from a vehicle you use to get around to a statement on free love and drugs. [More]

(CNNMoney)

Elon Musk Predicts Tesla Cars Will Be Able To Drive Themselves 90% Of The Time In 2015

Do you see that, off in the distance? Where flying cars are zooming around without a human hand to guide them? It’s what I call “The Jetsons Horizon” and if Elon Musk has anything to say about it, we’ll be getting closer to that line as soon as 2015. [More]

The math-hating socks at the heart of this story.

When Consumer Complains About Sexist Socks, Don’t Question The Airflow To Her Genitals

When you own a business, especially one that sells supposedly sassy socks and other items with humorous quips on them, you have to expect the occasional complaint when an attempt at humor goes over like a lead balloon. And even though you disagree with a person’s gripe, it’s best if you don’t accidentally forward her an internal e-mail calling her a “crazy bitch” and then follow it up with a message telling her to un-bunch her panties to “get some air up there.” [More]

A much smaller version of the dish. (Kimubert)

Group Claims World Record For Hawaiian Dish Made With 1,126 Pounds Of Rice, Hamburger, Eggs & Gravy

We are all about reaching for the stars and daring to dream your biggest dreams, folks, especially if it includes many, many feet of bratwurst or working together to create a 1,126-pound world record attempt for a dish containing rice, hamburger, eggs and gravy. [More]

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Life. Down. The Drain. (SkyMall)

SkyMall Wants You To Watch The Seconds Of Your Life Tick, Tick, Ticking Away

“Is this reeeeaaaall?!” is a question that we ask each other around Consumerist HQ pretty much every day. Because if we’ve learned anything from this wide world, it’s that people are absolutely trying their best to invent things that make us feel crazy inside. For example: A watch that counts down the years, months, days, hours, minutes and seconds of your life. Until you die. Not because the watch itself will kill you, but still, creepy. [More]

Man Proves You Can Just Slap Together Every Taco Bell Ingredient And Still Please People

Man Proves You Can Just Slap Together Every Taco Bell Ingredient And Still Please People

We’ve joked in the past that Taco Bell will eventually just wrap every every ingredient in its kitchen and serve that meat/cheese/lettuce/sauce beast as its own menu item. They recently let someone try just that, and apparently the results were not awful. [More]

Netflix CEO Asks: Why Aren’t Cable Companies Paying Us?

Netflix CEO Asks: Why Aren’t Cable Companies Paying Us?

For years, as cable companies and other Internet Service Providers have tried to round up support for their desire to charge a toll to bandwidth-heavy content providers like Netflix, they have repeatedly said that they deserve to be paid for carrying all that data to subscribers… even though they are already being paid by their own customers, and even though they are only carrying that content for a small fraction of its journey. Now the CEO of Netflix wants to know why that argument doesn’t swing both ways? [More]

(DCVision2006)

Jewelry Stores Hide Price Tags So Customers Don’t Bolt For The Door Immediately

There’s nothing quite like cruising around the aisles of a jewelry store or department like a creep, stealing glances at baubles and bangles while trying not to act too interested. Because there are no price tags on many of those items, so heaven forbid if someone were to come up and ask if you want to check it out, and then if turns out to be nine majillion dollars you have to back out, embarrassed. There’s a reason there are no price tags proudly on display, of course. [More]

(Michael W. May)

California Lays Down New Requirements For Olive Oil Labels

Sure, the label says California olive oil — but how do you know something else hasn’t crept in along the way, an oil of another sort? California is trying to prevent that adulteration from happening by instituting new standards for olive oil makers in the state. [More]

(Burger King Japan)

Burger King Japan Creates Black Cheese For Its Black Burger And I Don’t Know How To Feel

If the saying is true and we eat first with our eyes, hope you’re hungry for some garbage bags: Burger King Japan has introduced a new black cheese to match its black burgers. And while I normally applaud any iteration of cheese in general, chowing down on a melted piece of Darth Vader’s helmet isn’t exactly an appetizing thought. [More]

Inevitable Black Market For Olive Garden’s Elusive “Never Ending Pasta Pass” Emerges

(eBay)

If you’re not one of the 1,000 people who managed to get your hands on a $100 “Never Ending Pasta Pass” from Olive Garden that does, in fact, only last for a seven-week promotional period, don’t worry. You can either live your life the same way as before, or you can drop deep into the underbelly of Internet commerce and pay a jacked-up price for one. [More]

Discovery Not Afraid of Sharks Or Comcast; Comes Out Against Merger

Discovery Not Afraid of Sharks Or Comcast; Comes Out Against Merger

We told you last week that even though the initial public commenting period for the Comcast/Time Warner Cable merger has ended, the FCC is still talking to various media companies — including Discovery, operator of seemingly countless cable channels — to get their insights on the deal. Now the details of Discovery’s anti-merger arguments are being made public. [More]

John Oliver On For-Profit Colleges: You Might As Well Go To Hogwarts

John Oliver On For-Profit Colleges: You Might As Well Go To Hogwarts

What would it look like if you condensed all our hundreds of stories about student loans and for-profit colleges into a profanity-filled, hilarious rant that takes a brief detour to discuss Lyndon Johnson’s scrotum? John Oliver answered that question on Sunday night. [More]

FCC Fines T-Mobile $819,000 For Selling Phones That Don’t Work With Hearing Aids

FCC Fines T-Mobile $819,000 For Selling Phones That Don’t Work With Hearing Aids

Let’s point out something very, very obvious: within reason, everyone should have the right to communicate over the phone, even if they live with some form of hearing loss. For that reason, the Federal Communications Commission requires mobile phone carriers to sell a certain number of handsets that work with hearing aids. The agency says that T-Mobile failed to do this, and has fined them $819,000. [More]

Live rotting tomato coverage! (Fox2Now)

Heat Wave Leaves Hundreds Of Thousands Of Tomatoes To Rot Stinkily In Fields

Sure, farming can be stinky business. There are all those acres in need of fertilizer, after all, making things grow. But it’s an overdose of tomatoes that’s making fields stink to high heaven in Illinois, just south of St. Louis, Mo. [More]