Sometimes we have questions from you, our fresh-faced and bright-eyed Consumerist readers, that we just don’t have an answer for. And when that happens, we will move heaven and earth to get the answers. Or just you know, look into things. Thus it was with the Mystery Of Velveeta Cheese Slices And Differing Calorie Counts.

If there’s anything I like on this big blue marble, it’s talking about cheese (eating it comes first, of course). So gather round, everyone, for a tale from reader Paul, who sent in a very valid question with the above photo:

“All Velveeta is not created equal!” he wrote, saying that while shopping he happened upon a bit of a strange caloric phenomenon. “I discovered that the 16-slice package of Velveeta had a calorie count of 40 calories per slice while the 24-slice package of Velveeta had a calorie count of 35 calories per slice. How is this possible?”

How, indeed? The answer is pretty simple — turns out if you want a bit more of a cheese-like punch per slice, you should buy the 16-slice package. Per a spokeswoman from Kraft Foods:

“This is a great question and the answer is quite simple. The weight of the individual slices in the two packages is actually slightly different. In a 12 oz. package, which has 16 slices, each slice is .75 ox or 21g. In a 16 oz. package, which has 24 slices, each slice is .67 oz. or 19g. Because the weight of the individual slices in the 12 oz. package is slightly greater, the calorie count is also slightly higher. If you compare this to similar products, you’ll find the same thing in most cases.”

There you have it. The fatter the cheese slice, the more calories. And now you know, and we can all rest easy tonight, at last.

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