What have you done lately that’s worthy of a national record? Nothing? That’s fine, it’s not like any of us mere mortals can feel accomplished when a 12-year-old girl beats us all by selling 18,107 boxes of cookies in a single year, nabbing the national record. That’s approximately 18,107 more boxes of anything than the rest of us have probably sold this year.
The sixth grader from Oklahoma who is way more accomplished than yours truly isn’t stopping with her impressive sales figures either, reports USA Today: She wants to up the ante by selling 20,000 boxes by the end of march, and more than 100,000 boxes over the length of her Girl Scout career.
“She’s such a go-getter. She works countless hours,” her mother said, adding that in previous years she held state records for cookie sales. This year it was on to bigger and better things.
As for how this miniature business maven scores the big sales, well, everyone likes cookies, right? So she just asks everyone she sees to buy a box.
“Cookie selling is a lot of fun and I really enjoy doing it,” she says. “I felt really happy that I could do anything because I accomplished such a huge goal.”
She also puts in a lot of hours at the office — err, cookie stand. She sells from the moment she gets out of school until 9:30 on weeknights and puts in 12-13 hours on the weekends. She hasn’t said whether or not she wears a kick-ass power suit but that is how I’d like to imagine it all going down.
Her biggest haul comes from Thin Mints, her mom says.
“They stand out by a pretty large percentage. Samoas are a definite second.”
The Girl Scouts of Western Oklahoma are waiting until the end of cookie season on March 30 to address the girl’s claim and ostensibly give her the biggest, fanciest patch that exists.
Now back to hanging your head in shame that you’ll never have those kind of bragging rights.
You can follow MBQ on Twitter for any and all insights that lie at the bottom of a sleeve of Girl Scout cookies: @marybethquirk