Superfresh Sends Unsolicited E-Mail To Let Me Know It’s Taking A Break From Sending Unsolicited E-Mail

Well, thanks for reaching out... now go away.

Well, thanks for reaching out… now go away.

Did you ever break up with someone who, after the breakup, couldn’t stop proactively calling/texting/e-mailing you to let you know they were over you and this would be the last time you hear from them… until the next time? That’s sort of how this e-mail from supermarket chain SuperFresh comes across to us.

Consumerist reader Cate sent us the above screengrab of the e-mail she received from Superfresh, part of the A&P family — A&P, Pathmark, Food Emporium, Waldbaums.

Reads the message:

“Dear Loyal Customer,

On behalf of Superfresh, we thank you for your loyalty. We have decided to take a brief break from sending email communications to you in order to improve your email experience.”

Like an ex who is “over you,” Superfresh then provides all the other ways you could contact it, ya know… just in case you were lonely and needed some groceries… maybe some toiletries, or just to chat. No pressure, whatever…

“We will be back soon,” concludes the unasked-for correspondence, “and better than ever.”

You just go and take that much-needed time to yourself, Superfresh. We’re going to be really busy this semester, so… we probably won’t have time to hang out much.

Whatever you might think of Superfresh as a grocery store, it would make a horrible significant other.

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