Somewhere, There’s A Massive, Chocolatey, Delicious Black Market For Nutella

As mass-market food products go, chocolate-hazelnut spread and noted health food Nutella is pretty expensive per ounce. So it’s not really surprising that thieves made off with more than $20,000 worth of the stuff in the theft on seven pallets, from a parked semi-trailer truck in Germany.

Maybe the thieves were the same ones who have also stolen large quantities of coffee and of energy drinks in the same region in the last year. Or maybe they draw inspiration from recent reports that students who live on campus at Columbia University were sneaking $5,000 worth of Nutella out of dining halls every week, taking the concept of “all you can eat” to a new and delicious place.

Authorities at Columbia rushed to assure the press that students were only using, at most, $2,500 worth of Nutella per week when the spread first hit dining halls, and demand quickly fell after that. So they say. Or maybe they’re just covering for the vast, global hazelnut spread conspiracy.

Truckload of Nutella stolen in Germany [AFP]
Nutella in Ferris Booth costs Dining $5,000 per week, in part due to dining hall thievery [Spectator]
Columbia: No, Students Are Not Consuming $5,000 Worth Of Nutella A Week [CBS]