What's The Best Way To Deal With Obnoxious Moviegoers?

With movie ticket prices continuing to increase — and the home theater experience getting less expensive and more immersive — you can understand why consumers would get upset if their night out at the cinema is spoiled by some mouthy jerk, or by that person three seats over who can’t seem to stop texting. But how best to handle these people — Shaming? Violence? Ninjas?

That last one isn’t a joke — though it’s certainly a misnomer on the theater’s part — as a theater in the UK recently began using volunteer “ninjas” who sport black body suits and quietly guard moviegoers’ experience in exchange for free admission.

One ninja target shares their story on Slashfilm:

I normally hate noisy people in cinemas, but I got a call from my friend just as the movie started and thought I could get away with taking it. The last thing I expected was two completely blacked-out people suddenly appearing by our seats and give me and my mates a warning to shut up. It was actually pretty terrifying at first, but then I realised it was a bit of a laugh and a great way to make it clear what I was doing was having an impact on those around me. It certainly made me hang up and shut up for the rest of the film.

This is probably a better route than slapping some kid who keeps running his yap during a movie.

And it certainly would be an improvement on theater chains’ campaigns pleading with people to pay more attention to the big screen than the one on their phone, though we still love Alamo Drafthouse’s very public shaming of a customer who not only got kicked out for being obnoxious, but then left a rambling, vitriolic voicemail about how she’d been the victim of an injustice.

We do worry that someone will eventually sue a theater operator over the ninja thing. After all, there was that woman who sued a theater after she banged her head on am armrest while hunched over trying to take a call during a movie.

So what’s the answer? We want to hear from you — not just about texters and loud-talkers, but about how theaters should deal with out-of-control children and kids who shouldn’t be in the theater in the first place.

Comments

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  1. Coffee says:

    Unless it’s an AAA summer action flick that needs to be seen on a big screen RIGHT NOW (e.g. Batman), I simply don’t go to the movies anymore. Even on my fairly modest 42″ plasma television, the size of the screen is fine, it’s cheaper, and I don’t have to be around people who make me hate them.

  2. MeowMaximus says:

    Immediate execution, improve the gene pool.

  3. TheMansfieldMauler says:

    What’s The Best Way To Deal With Obnoxious Moviegoers?

    Redbox.

  4. Harry Greek says:

    1st and foremost – never go to the movies when it’s popular (opening day/weekend). Go when there aren’t massive droves of human slime sitting in the dark with you.

    If I must totally see a movie when it’s popular (which has not been the case) – don’t. Ever.

    I prefer to watch it on BluRay with a group of friends. I have a kick ass TV. And, I will enjoy the hell out of it. The movies are a terrible experience. They are expensive, dirty and filled to the brim with awful people who I don’t want to do anything with.

    • Coleoptera Girl says:

      A dollar theater, in the middle of the afternoon on a school day, is an excellent place to see movies if you still want the slightly sticky floors and the big theater screen. I saw Splice (*shudder*) and Spiderman at my local dollar theater and I was pleased with the experience… Very good for kind of bad but interesting movies (Splice, in my case)… and for pre-screening movies you might buy to watch again.

      Then again, I don’t have a home theater system or awesome TV. That will definitely come later, though… So for now, I have Hulu/Crackle and the dollar theater. No money to spare for the time being.

  5. Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

    Let me be the first on this blog to actually address the issue beyond “don’t go to the theatre.”

    Contact theatre security/employees. Bam!

    It’s boring, but it at least addressed the issue.

    • Blueskylaw says:

      “Contact theatre security/employees”

      You mean the underpaid, pimple faced 16 year old whose too busy chewing
      gum and sexting his girlfriend to even care about you and your concerns?

      • Coleoptera Girl says:

        Some of them are pretty cool. My fiancee and I went to a movie during the week a while back and someone was texting a few rows down from us, flashing the stupid light, and my fiancee went and informed an employee. Elderly guy, came and tapped the woman on the shoulder and probably said something to her. She at least stifled the light after that. :/

    • 85% Real 15% Filler says:

      Then you have to get out of your seat and miss part of the movie… wait, I see where you are going with “contact”. Pull out your cell and call the theater and ask for the manager or security and alert them of the problem.

      • RandomHookup says:

        And by the time you get back, the offender has put away the phone & gets a warning (if you can find him). When it happens 15 minutes later, same story.

  6. lovemypets00 - You'll need to forgive me, my social filter has cracked. says:

    Stay home, wait for it to come out on DVD. That way, if someone calls, or there’s an interruption, you can pause, go back, and rewatch the part you missed. It’s a win!

  7. Oh_No84 says:

    Best way = yell at them to GTFO.

  8. kanenas says:

    Wait till the movie comes out on Redbox or Netflix and watch it at home. I refuse to pay top dollar for a less than optimal movie watching experience anymore.

    • Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

      In what way does that stop bad moveigoers from being bad?

      /surly on a Friday

      • Mark702 says:

        By removing yourself from the situation, it doesn’t concern you anymore, that’s how.

        • Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

          In other words, not at all.

          • Tranorix says:

            If a bad moviegoer talks during a movie, but he’s alone in the theater, one could argue he is no longer a bad moviegoer.

        • TrustAvidity says:

          Plus it lessens the chance of you being disruptive to other people. We seem to be assuming everyone who reads this post is innocent themselves.

      • kanenas says:

        Until movie theaters decide that this problem is worth their trouble to fix, then I am not going to bother to spend my good money on their inferior product.

        And do you really think it is a good idea to directly confront a person who is being disruptive in a theater? Is such a person likely to see the error of his ways because you gave him a little talking to and stop it? Or is it more likely that the situation will escalate?

  9. George4478 says:

    I rarely go to the theater any longer since I upgraded my home theater.

    That said, a while back I sat behind a teenage girl who kept texting. Every time she answered her phone the sudden light made my leg twitch and kick the back of her seat. After a few bouts with my terrible, untreatable medical condition, she stopped.

    She was not happy but another symptom of my condition is the hormone givadam is very low..

  10. dourdan says:

    What’s The Best Way To Deal With Obnoxious Moviegoers?

    move

    just move your seat, i have doen this several times to get away from teens who want to throw popcorn at the screen or homeless peopel who are screaming.

    however there are certian times when this is impossble, such as “opening day, after 5 pm”- every one goes at that time for some reason or “IMAX”.- you cannot leave your seat once you enter an imax theatre.– avoid those situations.

    • Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

      You can generally hear some people across a theater. I had an annoying woman treat Toy Story 3 like it was a horror movie. She was screaming and yelling/laughing the entire time. Loud and obnoxious.

    • RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

      You also can’t move from the scent of someone soaked in Axe body spray. The stuff will spread out and fill an entire theater.

  11. shinseiromeo says:

    Perfect topic.

    I frequent my cinema usually twice a week, which has me dealing with ‘public’ quite often.

    Yesterday I went to see Celeste and Jesse. Besides my friend and I there’s ONE PERSON in the upper part of the theater. this person is wearing a heavy winter poofy parka when it’s in the high 70s out and is eating ice out of a large cup. Every two minutes I can hear them tilt the cup to get ice then start chomping away. After a few times of this I turned around and said very firmly “enough with the noise already”. They were done shortly after although they never did take off their coat and I could still hear it swish around.

    Last week: Expendables 2. I knew as soon as the couple walked in it was going to be a problem and I said to my friend literally “this is going to be a problem”. To put it matter of fact: typical walmart minority. Dirty clothes, long t shirt, talking LOUDLY as they even walked into the movie late. 500 seat theater, right tickets sold. They sit RIGHT behind us. The male decides to yawn loudly, the fake overly stretch yawn. I told him not to do it again and the female did the same, purposely. We moved a few rows and seats away and for the next 30 minutes, every 2-3 minutes, they would purposely ‘shout yawn’ and distract the entire theater.

    • Outrun1986 says:

      You have just cited the reason why I don’t go to the theater here, its gotta be 50 degrees in the theater! AKA its very, very cold in the theater. I am not one to be complaining about being too cold either, as I live in the northeast and I love air conditioning in the summer time, I don’t even mind when the AC blows right on me. But the theater is a totally different kind of cold, its so bone chillingly cold that it feels like you are in a freezer. Its even colder than the frozen dept. at the grocery store, which is very cold! So yes I can see wearing a huge parka to the theater…. If I ever get stuck going again I might have to do that as well!

      They do this in the winter time as well, blow air conditioning so you are even colder than you already are when you come in from the outside.

  12. deathbecomesme says:

    I had to tell some group of guys behind me to shut up in Expendables 2. Granted if you saw the first then you know the 2nd is going to be even more over the top. You accept this movie for what it is. they were joking loudly about all the outrageous stuff that happened. I mean LOUDLY. They were giggling like 13yos. Everyone was shushing them and giving them ugly looks. They wouldnt be quiet so finally I got up and turned around and told them very sternly “you guys need to keep it down…” Let them figure out the “or else” part on their own.

  13. DriveByLurker says:

    “… you’re going to burn in a very special level of Hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.”

    – Shepard Book

  14. jimmy says:

    I was at a theater in NYC at the Landmark seeing the movie ” Spun “. There was a couple next to me talking the whole time. I just said to them that I paid to hear the movie not hear them talking. They kept quiet from then on.

  15. Mambru says:

    Ninjas are always the solution to a problem. ALWAYS!

  16. Blueskylaw says:

    “What’s The Best Way To Deal With Obnoxious Moviegoers?”

    Shout out the ending if you know it.

  17. samonela says:

    “What’s The Best Way To Deal With Obnoxious Moviegoers?”

    Falcon Punch followed by a Zangief-style pile driver.

    – Internet Tough Guy.

  18. Flabbergasterisk says:

    People talking in movie shows?
    People smoking in bed?
    People voting Republican?
    Give them a boot to the head!

  19. twritersf says:

    Ejection seats.

  20. t2fastspin says:

  21. energynotsaved says:

    I am one of those strange people who loves to go to the movies. For max fun, I try to go early in the day on a weekday afternoon after the movie has been out for a week or so…. There are a few perks of being unemployed….. besides, the ticket prices are lower than prime time….

  22. powdered beefmeat says:

    I have no idea why people spend theatre’ money on watching a Drama or Comedy. I can experience these for free by gazing into a mirror.

  23. ichiban1081 says:

    It’s pretty sad when you have a plan of attack on going to the movies these days. My wife and I go to the theater when the movie we want to see has been out for about 2-3 weeks. We go on a Tuesday or a Wednesday right after work and so far it’s been great. Very small crowds and the age range is around 40 and up.

    • HogwartsProfessor says:

      That’s what I do, either go then or on a Sunday morning, a couple of weeks after it has opened. Sunday morning is good because many people are either in church or home with a hangover.

  24. akede2001 says:

    “Look out, they’re comin` right for us!” *BLAMMM*

  25. benminer says:

    “I got a call from my friend just as the movie started and thought I could get away with taking it. ”

    Why? Why would you think this is ever ok?

    If this guy got beat up to within an inch of his life I would have zero sympathy.

  26. Sidd Finch says:

    Without question, this is the best way to deal with them.

  27. CalicoGal says:

    MOVIE THEATRE: Other people, lumpy chairs, dirty facility, cell phones, over-priced snacks, Talky McTalkerson, BEDBUGS!!!!!!

    MY HOUSE: Big screen, surround sound, quiet couch, healthy cheap snacks, PAUSE button, blanket, CATS!!

  28. lucyrickyalex says:

    The ONLY solution to this epidemic:

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/movie_theater_layout

    (warning: contains one or two of George Carlin’s favorite words)

    • NickRayko says:

      Is there a situation for which there is neither an appropriate Oatmeal nor XKCD comic? We’re fucked if that’s the case.

  29. wellfleet says:

    I like a simple “Can you please stop talking?” said in a polite voice and always with “please.” That way, if the person is obnoxious back, they look like giant asshats and other people chime in to get them to stop. If it continues, I get up and get a theater employee. I love going to the movies and I’m not letting anyone ruin my experience because they’re a special snowflake.

    And, this person who was accosted by the theater ninjas… If I were a violent person, he would be the target to all my rage. What a vile piece of excrement to think that his meaningless, stupid, “where r u” phone call needs answering during a movie. Seriously, what a douche.

  30. IndyJaws says:

    Is this really a widespread problem? I truly am curious. Mrs. Indy and I go to the movies frequently and never run into this. However, I realize that’s a poor cross-section because A) We live in Indiana where people are generally respectful (but certainly have our share of idiots, too), and B) We typically go to matinees ($5 baby!).

    • pecan 3.14159265 says:

      That’s probably the reason. Where in Indiana do you live? We will really only go to one theater in our area (DC area) because we have a pretty good audience no matter what movie we see, and we always go in the evenings, usually on opening weekend.

    • chancyrendezvous says:

      I don’t have a problem with talkers; most of the time it’s texters. It’s the equivalent of a bright flashlight in a dark room no matter how stealthy people try to be and it’s very distracting. I tend to live in college towns, though, so that might skew my experience.

    • RandomHookup says:

      The biggest problem I see (and these are free college campus or community screenings — not in the megaplex) is the constant turning on of smart phones. I was at MIT and I saw about 10 separate times when people lit up their screens. The mindset is that it’s okay to do that in a dark room because I need to know the time or someone is trying to reach me. There seems to be little understanding that this is rude.

      I’ve also seen it at a local film festival — packed rooms and yet someone will turn on a smart phone in the dark room. It’s so distracting….

  31. Sarek says:

    Can they be shot with a gun using a silencer?

  32. Maxedaddy says:

    Bouncers like at a bar! If you don’t like it, don’t buy a ticket!

  33. axiomatic says:

    Toss em out… straight up. It’s the reason I don’t go to the movies anymore.

  34. Alexk says:

    Part of the problem is that the cultural norms have shifted. Twenty years ago, if you asked someone to stop talking, they did–and I once got audience applause for making the request. Nowadays, people think you’re strange for asking. And texting? Some people can’t even fathom the request–they think of it as private.

    I’ve a friend who actually bought a phone jammer–quite illegal in the U.S. He gets his kicks by waiting for the twits to start texting, and then he shuts down their phones.

    • Caddyshack says:

      lol,,,,,love it!

    • AzCatz07 says:

      I have a neighbor a few doors down who decided to blast music Sunday morning around 8 am while he was cleaning his car in his driveway. I walked down to his house and nicely asked him to turn it down. He told me he wasn’t going to and didn’t care that it was bothering me. He wasn’t necessarily nasty to me, but he absolutely refused to turn it down.

      If a neighbor came to my house and asked me turn down my music, I’d be embarrassed that I had inconvenienced a neighbor in the first place. I’d apologize and turn it down. Some people are just asses. Of course, I’m aware I have neighbors, so I wouldn’t do that in the first place.

      • TheCorporateGeek Says Common Sense Is The Key says:

        So basically you backed down like a sackless wonder?

        I’ll go a round with someone over this type of stuff, may or may not get my ass kicked but it lets them know you ain’t fucking around…

        • AzCatz07 says:

          I didn’t back down. I called my HOA and let them deal with it. Why on earth would I pick a fight with a grown man? I’m not trying to get shot or punched.

          Sorry if you think I’m a sackless wonder. Although I am female, so maybe I don’t have this sack to which you refer.

          By the way, you’re a dick.

        • RvLeshrac says:

          I mean, I guess you could beat them, but then you’re in jail, and will most likely lose your job.

        • kanenas says:

          “So basically you backed down like a sackless wonder?”

          Another internet tough guy.

          Do you really believe that being rude, aggressive and potentially physical is the best way for (presumably) adults to solve this problem?

          I like the poster’s solution… call the authorities who can enforce civil behavior and let them handle it.

        • shepd says:

          There’s no need to go any further directly with him other than nicely asking for the behaviour to stop. That’s plenty enough courtesy. The only thing I would personally do after that is say “If you’re not going to willingly stop it, I’ll have to ask someone in authority to make the request”, but that’s more than I would expect anyone else to do ( and I’m big enough a guy that small children cower in my presence… :P ).

          AzCatz did the right thing.

      • balderdashed says:

        I’m all for trying to be a good neighbor, but I find it interesting that you make a point to tell us it was “Sunday morning around 8 AM.” Is there something special about that day and time, that you feel deserves more respect than Thursday at 8 AM, or 7:30 on a Friday? Sunday might be someone’s day of worship, or religiously-mandated day of rest. I find it a pretty good day to wash my car, which I typically do at 7 AM — that’s when the Church down the block starts ringing its bone-rattling bells, and at that point I can’t sleep anyway.

        • quail20 says:

          Sunday is usually a good day to sleep off a good bender. 8 am on a Sunday is like 4 in the morning any other day. :p

        • Trick says:

          OK we get it, you hate religion. Do you feel better now changing the subject to how you feel about religion?

          In the real world that doesn’t revolve around how you can twist a subject around so you can dwell on religion, most people work weekdays and by 8AM on Thursday or Friday, they are off to work, taking their kids to school etc.

          Most people have the weekend off and like to sleep in on Sunday. Maybe they get up at 8AM then go to church too. What’s it to you? Are they dragging your pathetic ass to church with them or something?

          • Evil_Otto would rather pay taxes than make someone else rich says:

            Wow, you got from ‘The church bells wake me up and it’s annoying” to “you hate religion?” And then you accused him of ‘dwelling on religion’? I’ve re-read the comment you’re replying to a few times, and I’m positive the commenter expressed no opinion on religion, just something down the street that makes noise that happens to be a church. As a matter of fact, he/she actually defends the concept of Sunday being a day of rest in some religions.

            I’ve never seen a better example of the irrational persecution complex that some people have regarding their religion (especially when they are actually in the majority). Face it, some people believe in different things than you do (or nothing at all). It’s a fact of life. Deal with it. Pray for the strength to do so, if you’re so inclined.

        • Samuelm456 says:

          Sorry troll, but you cannot legitimately question someone holding Sunday as a day to be quiet…this is not something that can be debated, if you are a member of American society.

          Not religious either – ever walk out of your abode on a Sunday morning? See/hear anything moving? That’s cause most people treat Sunday as a day of rest, before our work week starts. That is NOT difficult to understand, or to respect.

          Oh, and playing loud music that disturbs your neighbors in the morning at 8AM is NOT okay, regardless of the day. I’m sure that guy blaring music has been annoyed at someone doing the same thing to him on an early morning, and that just makes him a hypocrite.

      • tghaney says:

        Had the same problem in an apartment complex, the offender said that “if I didn’t like it, I shouldn’t have moved into a Black Apartment” This complex was new when I moved in, I was the first tenent in my building. The only thing that made it a “Black” apartment was section 8 tenents galore that moved in after I did. I subsequently bought a house and moved out.

    • oldwiz65 says:

      I also hate the twits who use their cell phones in the toilet stall. Not only can everyone hear what they are saying, but the poor person receiving the call has to contend with bodily function sounds. Blech

  35. Delicious Spam is delicious says:

    they are the reason I come armed with gummy bears.

  36. mmcnary says:

    I have once stood up in front of the the offender and said if they were going to be louder than the movie, I might just as well watch them instead.

  37. AzCatz07 says:

    I have no problem with going to the manager to complain about someone who’s disrupting my movie-going experience. I used to say something to the offender, but if they’re rude enough to be obnoxious in the first place, chances are they’re only going to cause a problem if I speak up. I should note that I’m a petite female. My brother, on the other hand, is 6’6″ and about 250 lbs. For some reason, people tend to shut up when he tells them to do so.

    • RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

      I’ve gone out front and gotten the theater manager too (disabled wimpy girl), but the problem is that you still miss half your movie, this time from getting up, going out, finding the manager, etc. Then you have to do that “Are they looking at me? Are they gonna kill me in the parking lot?” thing the rest of the movie.

      The thing that I have been tempted to do is to go out, find the manager, tell him that the experience was unsatisfactory, given the fact that the usher went through the movie once with his little flashlight, did nothing to stop anything like talking or texting, ran like his feet were on fire, and left. And then ask for free tickets for another showing.

      If enough people did this, the ushers would do what they’re suppose to and stop this kind of thing due to lost funds from refunds.

      • RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

        My comment above needs a few more commas.

      • AzCatz07 says:

        It doesn’t actually take that long. I’d rather miss a few minutes of a movie than have the entire thing ruined. Also, you can always request a refund from the manager.

        • RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

          Ah, but you’re not disabled. It takes me forever. And don’t even get me started on trying to get up the stairs because some idiot thinks it’s fun to park all of his shopping in the only handicap accessible areas.

        • Professor59 says:

          It absolutely does take that long, disabled or not. You just can’t find anyone of authority interested in intervening in these matters in a modern multiplex. I haven’t seen an “usher” in many years. There are just kids who take your tickets, and everyone else is selling something.
          I have missed a lot of time at a lot of movies trying to do this very thing and there is zero satisfaction in it. I have never seen a human being involuntarily get kicked out of a movie theater in my life. Occasionally someone will be shamed into leaving for a phone call or a screaming child, but that’s it.

        • erinpac says:

          I’ve never been able to successfully get a refund that way, and it usually takes at least twenty minutes to get someone to get the manager, if they’ll even talk to you at all.
          The theaters are just not worth the cost anymore – the movies are better at home, if you are willing to wait.

  38. Haplo9000 says:

    So ok…isn’t it supposed to be “Trekkies”, TWC?

  39. prismatist says:

    My 500mW laser into their eyes usually shuts them up. Well, at least after the screaming and convulsing settle down.

  40. macemoneta says:

    For 15 years, starting in the 1980’s, we went to the movies every week with friends. Then people started with the noise, and cell phones, and yelling at the screen, and non-stop loud conversations and popcorn throwing. Now, we rarely go more than once a year.

    When I was younger (in the 1960’s) there were people that were paid to keep the peace: ushers (think movie bouncers). If you didn’t keep it quiet, you were thrown out. If you showed up after the movie started, you had to wait for the next showing, so as not to disturb those watching.

    Now that we pay 20 times as much to see a movie (3 times the inflation adjusted value), I think they should return to the tried and true method.

    Or they could just die. I’ve learned to like watching movies at home, both for the lack of distractions and the convenience of being able to take a break whenever I want. I suspect this is the actual result that we can expect.

    • bityard says:

      Agree completely. I’m about a zillion times happier watching a movie at home, at the time of my own choosing, in my underwear, than I am going to the theater and paying an inflated ticket price, with expensive snacks, and dealing with the crowd of idiots.

      The only reason I’ve ever stepped foot inside a movie theater in the last ten years was so that the wife and I could get out of the house and do something that normal couples do.

  41. RadarOReally has got the Post-Vacation Blues says:

    You know, everyone keeps saying “don’t go” and “I have a Dolby 600-speaker system and a 1000-inch TV at home”, but to some of us movie lovers, part of the excitement of a new movie is seeing it with a group.

    If you’re like me, half the high from a great movie early in its run in a packed theater is that you will never in your living room hear 500 people laugh at once, or spontaneously applaud at the end of the thing as though the director is bowing in front of the screen. You won’t come early to hear other fans buzzing about the same thing you’re so excited about. You lose the environment, it’s not as good. It’s not about the technology only.

    Unfortunately, people like me are in the minority, and the rest of you have gone off to your caves to enjoy movies in solitude. We’re left with the losers and talkers, without a majority of decent people to send a wave of “shhhh” along a crowded row and shut people up with the power of crowd-shaming.

    I’ll still keep going, though. Yeah, most of the time it’s bad for my blood-pressure. But that one time out of five when I get just the right audience and can experience seeing people around me crying or laughing, applauding at some fantastic moment, or I can see well-behaved kids learning to love the theater as much as I do, that one time will keep me coming back.

    • bityard says:

      “If you’re like me, half the high from a great movie early in its run in a packed theater is that you will never in your living room hear 500 people laugh at once, or spontaneously applaud at the end of the thing as though the director is bowing in front of the screen.”

      Yeah, but isn’t that why we have Twitter now?

    • thomwithanh says:

      I miss when I actually DID go to movies on a regular basis:

      Snakes on a Plane a few years ago on opening weekend. When Samuel L. said “I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane” the entire theater started saying the line along with him and cheered wildly.

      Lord of the Rings: Return of the King at a midnight showing on it’s opening in 2003 – packed theater, a lot of people came in costume, applause at each character’s first entrance, applause during the battle scenes and a standing ovation at the end. Same thing happened at several of the Harry Potter movies

      Seeing Superbad and both Hangovers with my younger brother in a packed theater with everybody else laughing as hard as we were are some of the best memories we have together.

  42. NotEd says:

    I am all for movie ninijas. Arm them with knockout gas and tasers and let them sit outside the theater at the end of each showing to ask for tips. Sans taser at that time, hopefully.

    Also I would like stocks in the lobby to shame repeat offenders and maybe a little jail cell for parents who take babies into R rated films and won’t remove them when they get upset.
    The children themselves will be removed to a safe, educational enviroment where they will be taught a preapproved set of theater manners. For those who fail they get sentanced to… The Ball Pit!

  43. Rubberduckgrrl says:

    Maybe see theaters post a number at the start of the movie and on signs in theater for patrons to directly text the theater so it can be dealt with?

    Offenders should be ejected with no refunds.

    I pay good money to go to the movie and I don’t expect to have to deal with obnoxious bozos. This is exactly why I’ll wait for it to come out on DVD or streaming – because the theaters DON’T deal with the misbehaving patrons.

  44. NorthAlabama says:

    theaters better figure something out that works, and this is a good first step.

    box office attendance is dropping. and theaters wonder why? when you pay $15-$25 a person depending on IMAX and refreshments, you have little patience for a negative experience. if you tell the manager, you’ve missed the movie, and have to start over. if you politely request the offending patron stop the disruption, you could be met with retaliation, even harm.

    i used to go almost every weekend. now, if i’m lucky, it’s once a month, and usually late on a monday or tuesday night, with few others, so we can easily move if something happens.

    it’s better just not to go. i wonder why attendance is down…

  45. SoCalGNX says:

    Lunch of a really good chili with lots of beans, onions and garlic.

  46. zippygaelle says:

    Bravo, AZCatz

  47. Obtruder says:

    I have no problem telling annoying people in the theater to shut the hell up and ousting them in front of the whole theater.

    • EarthAngel says:

      Last time I took DS to the movies, a couple of teenie boppers next to us texted throughout the entire movie. After 15 minutes of seeing the annoying bright blue screen out of the corner of my eye, I told her to stop. Five minutes later, she started texting again. “I will go see the manager.” She put down the phone.

      The movie we were watching was funny. DS was laughing. The stupid teenie bopper actually turned to me and said, “I’m sorry. We’re trying to watch a movie. Can you guys stop being so loud?” I looked at her and said, “No.” She didn’t say anything throughout the rest of the movie.

      People these day have zero respect.

  48. bben says:

    Because of jerks like these I refuse to go into a theater. I will wait until I can watch it in peace at home.

  49. quail20 says:

    Read about the Ninja ushers being used in London. Cool concept. Sad to say it but my best movie experiences are still in front of my wide screen HDTV. By the time a movie’s run long enough to have a small (and hopefully quiet) audience it’s been relegated to one of the smaller screens in the cinema — a place where there’s streaks on the screen & the surround sound seems to be off.

  50. thomwithanh says:

    Between 3D, rising prices, other patrons ruining my movie going experience and the endless slew of advertisements before (Regal, I’m looking at you) and during the movie with product placements, it’s just not worth it anymore to me. I go to the cinema on average twice a year, usually for a big “event” sort of movie (e.g. The Hobbit) – everything else I wait till it’s at Red Box or on On Demand.

  51. SilverBlade2k says:

    How about causing some financial hardship on the person being annoying?

    If someone is being disruptive in the movie – kick them out right away and give them a fine, say $100?

  52. Sad Sam says:

    Frankly, we just don’t go to the movies very often or we go to the drive in. The last time we were at a traditional movie theater, late at night for a R rated movie, there were babies and little kids in attendance who were crying and fussy the entire time (which makes sense since the movie was ultra violent). If the theater wants the money from the parents with kids in tow then they don’t want it from me, they can’t have it both ways.

  53. 401k says:

    Get vocal with the rude person. Trust me, the entire theater will have your back.

    • RiverStyX says:

      ^ This.

      It also works in class when know-it-all ingrates are sitting next to you talking to each other. Telling them to STFU has never resulted in an incident between me and the offenders.

  54. Robert Nagel says:

    My wife and I went to see the Moody Blues once and we were seated in the next to last row. There was a drunk lady about ten seats down that kept getting up and asking them to sing “She’s a Lady”. When I had had enough I told her in as loud a voice as I could control that they didn’t sing “She’s a Lady” and please sit down. She sat down. The guy sitting next to her boyfriend started to negotiate buying their tickets to get them out. next thing two ushers were on them escorting them out. Apparently she was interfering with the sound crew to boot.
    His comment? “I didn’t know we were bothering you”. Some people.

  55. orion70 says:

    I still love going to the movies, although I don’t go often. There’s just some stuff that has to be seen on a big screen.

    One thing I’ve noticed is that if you go to film festivals, you don’t have these problems. People are typically genuinely interested in being there.

  56. mulch says:

    Simple, I quit going to movies. That was after the very large fellow sprayed something sticky on my leg during The Fountain. After the manager gave me a fistful of free passes and assured me that “it happens all the time” I decided, after scrubbing off with bleach repeatedly, that my movie going days were over.

  57. eldritch2k4 says:

    I am a large man; I am 6’8″, 360lbs and my voice booms when I so desire. Generally, making my presence known and dropping a growled f-bomb will get most people in the theater in line. I have also been known to get applause and cheers from an audience for using this talent.

    csb: My wife and I went to see The Dark Knight Rises. We have an 18 month old son, so we don’t get to see many movies, as I won’t burden others with a screaming toddler, if I can help it. So, we really want to enjoy our movie and we did, right up until the end. That was when the douchenozzle behind us started texting and apparently didn’t realize that “Silence your cell phones” meant him, too. As Alfred is giving the eulogy at the end, the phone does its stupid, little twitter and rage mode goes off. I spin in my chair and growled, through clinched teeth, “Turn it the f*** off.” Not another sound from him, no phone, no smart-ass comment, nothing. His group was the first out of the theater, too.

    While I don’t normally enjoy the fact that most people are scared of me, it does have its uses.