Have You Finished Buying All Your 'National HP Toner Month' Gifts Yet?

With so many things going on in this crazy world, it’s easy to lose track of the holidays. Luckily, Consumerist reader Mike recently received an e-mail from Office Depot reminding him that September is indeed National HP Toner Month, that time when families gather together by a bonfire to roast marshmallows, sip cider and swap tales of past National HP Toner Months.

And of course, each town as its National HP Toner Month parade, in which the Toner Princess and her escorts ride down the High Street on floats pulled by Chevy trucks left over from National Truck Month.

Some believe that the growing popularity of National HP Toner Month is what has led to big box retailers putting out their Christmas items during the summer months. After all, once a young child’s mind turns to thoughts of toner, it’s hard to get them into the Yuletide spirit again.

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  1. Graymalkin56 says:

    And Wednesday, Sept. 12, will be National iPhone 5 Frenzy Day.

  2. KyBash says:

    It sort of makes sense since September is also National Be Kind To Editors and Writers Month.

    I’m wondering how this site is going to celebrate tomorrow — Sept. 11 is National No News Is Good News Day.

  3. Quirk Sugarplum says:

    I remember how me and the other kids in the old neighborhood would gather around on HPaunukkah and spin the toner for gelt and original UPC labels. Oh, the fun we had!

    • mikeMD says:

      We only had inkjets at our house growing up. I felt so left out as a kid. What with all the “Happy Toner” here and “Happy Toner” there it was so alienating. Then when the cashier says “Happy Printer Month” other people declare a “War” on Toner Month. I am married with my own children now and we celebrate Toner Month with one set of grandparents and Inkjet Week with the others. It’s all so confusing for them. But we still like to sit around and listen to the stories of our ancestors in the days of dot matrix printers with ribbons.

      • Stickdude says:

        Dot matrix?

        Back in my day, our printers had daisy wheels! And we liked it!

      • Diabolos needs more socks says:

        My father’s a Benedictine monk, you insensitive clod!

      • jeepguy57 says:

        I remember my grandpa telling me stories when I was kid about his first dot matrix. It only got 6 pages to a ribbon but man did he do tons of printing with that thing. Like he always said, they just don’t make ‘em like that anymore.

        I am trying to track down an ’86 Epson to work on with my son. Want to show him what real printer is.

  4. polishhillbilly says:

    toner makes great swinging targets. The puff of toner when you hit it, is rather breathtaking to behold. Causes everyone to giggle.

  5. Revanche says:

    Chris, excellent snarky article. I really enjoyed the creative spirit you showed.

  6. axolotl says:

    This is the best thing since Migratory Birds Day

  7. Hoss says:

    I’ve stacked my spent cartridges and put a string of lights around them. I also found a way to spray more toner in the room so I get that nostalgic scent of when I changed cartridges with my granddad. I hope mom brings the kids a magenta

  8. ReverendTed says:

    I remember the year some mean older kids told me Tonerclaus wasn’t real. I still listened for the sound of the be-sooted elf shaking new toner cartridges on Tonermas Eve, but I couldn’t ignore the knowledge that it was my parents who left those boxes and puffy plastic bags lying around for me to find. I couldn’t even bring myself to load my old cartidges into the boxes for recycling on Tonermas morning.

  9. PragmaticGuy says:

    Geez, I feel so left out, my laser fax is made by Brother. Waaaah.

    • scoosdad says:

      There there, Brother’s toner month will be February next year. Be patient and be happy for HP. They’ve paved the way for all other toner manufacturers to have their own month now.

      • ReverendTed says:

        I was going to crack a joke about how you gave Brother the shortest month, then I realized “Brother”, “February”? I hope that’s just a coincidence.

  10. MarkFL says:

    I have a Canon printer. I AM A COMMUNIST!!!!!!

    (By the way, does Office Depot have a nice selection of HP Toner Month cards I can send to my mom?)

  11. AnonymousCommenter says:

    This event is then followed up with the less publicized HP Employee Layoff month.

    http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10000872396390444100404577643352249358504.html

  12. akronharry says:

    On 9-10 I went to Office Max and picked up a refurbished cartridge for 14.99 and had brought my old cartridge along to make sure I bought the right one. As I was checking out the clerk noticed I bought the old one along and said ” Good thing you are buying a cartridge instead of refilling the old one!”
    I asked him why and he said that they recommended buying a cartdige instead of refilling the old one because they can’t get as much ink in the cartridge as a store bought cartridge. I asked him how that can be and he said that he did not know but management had told him to say it. WTF