Best Fraud Spam Ever

Something about this spammed fraud attempt that landed in our inbox amused me. Maybe it was the chicken burgers for mother.

From: [redacted]
Subject Line: BIRTHDAY PARTY

My name is [redacted] i will like to order for chicken burger for 150 guest and it will be picked up by 6Pm on the 17th of September for my Mothers b-day party it will be pickup by private carrier and so can i want you to give me the total cost and let me know if you accept credit card

thanks
[redacted]

I would like to believe that somewhere out there is a thoughtful son who needs to buy one-hundred and fifty chicken burger patties for his mother’s birthday, but sadly, this being the cynical age we live in where people come up with some of the most cockamamie ideas for advance fee fraud – the key fraud word in this email is “private carrier” – that’s not the case.

Comments

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  1. Oranges w/ Cheese says:

    Wow! Consumerist when did you start selling chicken burgers and WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US! I want to order 1000 to feed my cat army. Stat! And I demand free shipping!

  2. Rocket says:

    Respond with a price, and see if you get paid.

  3. MDSasquatch says:

    This is a great site for those that find humor in such things:

    http://www.419eater.com/index.php

  4. humphrmi says:

    I can haz Chicken Burger?

  5. Sheila says:

    Yes, and please deliver them to us at the Ikea here in Houston. I’ll be the one with 86 cats on my lap. We’re hungry.

  6. grumpskeez says:

    This chicken burger goes up to 11

  7. trippingguavas says:

    I work at a restaurant and we get things like this ALL THE TIME…except, not via e-mail. We get them via Relay call, and it’s hilarious because the Relay operator has to repeat *everything* you say, no matter what you say. So usually my manager will lead the scammers all the way until the very end of the deal, when the scammers think they’re going to nab a sucker, and then he starts yelling obscenities and describing all the things he would do to the scammers’ mothers.

    It happens at least four times a week, no joke.

    • shockwaver1 says:

      What the hell is a relay call?

      • Boven says:

        It’s a call via a TDD relay service for people who are deaf. Scammers call into the service via a text terminal and the service calls the restaurant they’re targeting. The operator at the service basically reads off what’s coming in on the terminal and types the responses back into it.

        • smbizowner says:

          gee, we always try and get the Credit card number up front from the parasite so we can report it to the cc co as stolen.
          usually when we say yes, we can and what CC will you use to pay, they hang up really really quickly. We and the TDD relay personnel have a good laugh.

          oh and our calls are always 50 floral arrangements for $85 +/- for each and a private carrier will pick them up, please add $1500 to the CC to pay for the carrier. bla bla bla

  8. mcnerd85 says:

    I would like two chicken burger patties. No bun. I would like bacon and pepperjack cheese inbetween. Hold the mayo like substance. Drizzle with a light cream cheese frosting instead.

  9. Captain Walker says:

    I want a chickenburger. No, cheeseburger. I want a hot dog. I want a milkshake. I want potato chips.

  10. vitajex says:

    I would be infinitely more impressed if this order for 150 chicken burgers was to be picked up by private carrier pigeon.

  11. Nighthawke says:

    Spamcop it. Let the ISP’s sort it out.

  12. Big Mama Pain says:

    Anyone know how an advance fee scam works? Never heard of this one…

  13. Hoss says:

    So how would the scam play out? I’m lost

    • QueenofSheepsbaaah says:

      Me too. This sounds like those oh so hilarious prank calls we used to get when I worked at the local pizza joint back in the stone age. Some clever high schooler would call up and order 6 super supremes etc. for pickup (no delivery from the mom and pop joint) and never pick up. The owners hated it but my room mates loved it when I brought home the spoils. I suspect they may have been the culprits on occasion.

    • runswithscissors says:

      AFAIK it’s the old overpayment scam. They want to use a “private courier” who will pickup the order and then they tell you to “add $X to the credit card bill to pay the courier”. Courier dude shows up, you give them the merchandise and pay them the $X in cash for their fee (after all, the customer paid that too via the CC) and off the courier dude goes. But courier dude was in on the scam and isn’t a courier at all. CC comes back as stolen (natch) so payment is reversed against you, the seller and now you’re out both the product and the $X you paid the “courier”.

      Variant is the PayPal way which I’m getting several emails attempting now that I’m trying to sell a vehicle. “I will buy your vehicle and pay you exactly what you are asking and someone will come pickup the vehicle, I will pay you for the vehicle via paypal”. Then I’m sure they’d overpay me via PayPal so that I can pay the pickup guy for them and then pickup guy comes to pickup the vehicle and takes his payment from me. Likely he ditches the vehicle later as its not even the target (the overpayment is) and not worth being pursued for (or he drops it at a chopshop, who knows?). And of course the coup de gras is that PayPal has to reverse the payment once the credit card used to pay me turns out to be stolen – leaving me on the hook for all that money. Whee! So of course I’m ignoring these emails.

      This is all just my understanding of how these scams are supposed to work… I’ve never yet been taken by one, just read other internet people’s descriptions.

  14. wehojoel says:

    I worked at an art gallery and we’d get calls and emails like this all the time. For those who asks how it works. The courier they want to use would be how the pay off would be. Who ever would want to buy the picture said they would wire us the money but before that we had to arrange for the transportation. The courier or delivery service they requested or insisted was the only one that would deliver would demand an upfront payment only via Western Union or some other wire service. For some reason UPS/FedEx wasn’t good enough. So the courier/delivery service was the scam and how they’d get the money. I am shocked that this even works at all.

  15. barcodetattoo says:

    EVER? Really?

  16. mac-phisto says:

    “the key fraud word in this email is “private carrier””

    really? i thought the key word was [redacted]. i don’t ever accept anything from [redacted]. he’s a total douche.

    seriously though. we’re censoring fake names in a spam email now? wow.

  17. Mxx says:

    Ben, and you didn’t [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scam_baiting]ScamBait[/url] him?!

  18. Chasing Headless Chickens says:

    This scam is very popular against businesses. They should be easy to spot, but I can’t tell you how greedy some business people are, and the attraction of money over-rides their common sense. I’ve tried to prevent my mom’s boss from getting scammed severa times. Even after I warn him and provide all the supporting evidence, he’s still been taken at least once. The purchaser wanted to buy a few cabinets and ship them overseas. He was willing to pay thousands for these cabinets (which only cost a few hundred) and then spend thousands to send them overseas via his “private carrier.” Did my mom’s boss stop to think that this didn’t make sense, considering you could buy the same cabinets that country, for probably $100? Of course not!

  19. scoobydoo says:

    I sat in my local Gyros joint listening to the owner take one of these calls, try to run various CC numbers several times and even start getting orders prepared. Eventually I walked up to him and explained what was happening. Amazing how many people are so clueless about scams.

  20. Extractor says:

    Go to Burger King or McDonalds for the $ menu. Thats all I buy from them since mid August and can get stuffed on $3. Sent one of the office staff out to MickyDs, Labor Day Saturday, with a 20 and she returned with 3 bags. 1 with 12 sandwiches, 1 with 3 fries(worthless since cold), and 1 with something. I even got change and there were leftover sandwiches. Also save your Burger King reciepts for the free whopper offer on the back. I give my reciepts to one of my assistants. So I pay $3 for 2 1/4 lb burgers and a chicken sandwich and the reciept gives a free whopper when drink and fry is purchased. Decent deal.