There are those who hate their jobs and those who love to hate their jobs. Chris says he is a Subway sandwich maker who falls into the latter category, putting in extra work to make your sandwich suboptimal. He eats your pain with relish. Here’s what he does to your sandwich:

I’ve been working at subway for about a year and a half, and it always amuses me when people complain about not tessellating cheese [ed. see “This Is Not A Test” – Subway Says It Definitely Will Start Tessellating Cheese July 1“]. Now, merely to amuse myself, not only do I not tessellate the cheese, but I also leave gaps in the cheese placement so that an indeterminate amount of your bites will be cheeseless.

Also, I put a really small amount of dressing on your sandwich whenever you ask for it. Then when you ask for more, I squirt out a large quantity before you can say stop so that your sandwich has far too much dressing.

Then, when I cut the sandwich in half, I only cut it 3/4ths of the way through so that you have to messily tear the rest of the sandwich yourself.

Cheers!

– Chris

Thanks Chris! Now I know what to watch out for. If I see you do that to my sandwich, you’ll get to do it all over again until you make it right.

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