Here’s a company that will help those who really, really need more help killing Col. Mustard in the parlor with the candlestick in Mafia Wars: Australian company uSocial is selling Facebook “friends” and Twitter followers by the batch. If you want 5,000 more adoring Facebook minions checking out your status updates, you pay $654.30.

The offer is best suited for companies looking to spread word about themselves on the cheap via social media. Reuters reports:

“Facebook is an extremely effective marketing tool,” Leon Hill, uSocial CEO, said in a statement.

“The simple fact is that with a large following on Facebook, you have an instant and targeted group of people you can contact and promote whatever it is you want to promote,” he added.

“The only problem is that it can be extremely difficult to achieve such a following, which is where we come in.

Understandably, Facebook is miffed. Its rules prohibit using personal profiles to promote personal gain, so we’ll see how long this business model lasts, assuming the bought friends are uSocial contractors. CNN is hoping Twitter doesn’t ban uSocial before it can buy its way back into competition with Ashton Kutcher.

Not enough Facebook friends? Buy them [Reuters]
(Thanks, Michael and Kim!)

Want more consumer news? Visit our parent organization, Consumer Reports, for the latest on scams, recalls, and other consumer issues.