Perhaps you have noticed that restaurants like to give their food interesting names. Perhaps you have also avoided ordering the food by its interesting name because it’s completely ridiculous. We looked through dozens of chain-restaurant menus to find the 7 most painful-to-order names out there. Enjoy.
1. Chili’s “Quesadilla Explosion Salad” As if the idea of a quesadilla salad wasn’t silly enough, they had to add a little Jerry Bruckheimer to the mix. What exactly is a “quesadilla explosion,” you ask? “Fajita-marinated chicken, mixed cheese, corn relish, cilantro, diced tomato, crispy tortilla strips and ancho-chile ranch drizzle. Served with fire-grilled cheese quesadilla wedges and our citrus-balsamic dressing.” Sounds kinda tasty, but do we have to say “quesadilla explosion” when we order it?
2. Applebee’s “Chicken Parmesan Tanglers” Tangler is not a delicious-sounding word. It sounds like something one must have removed from the rear end of a beloved pet.
3. Cheesecake Factory‘s “Weight Management Asian Chicken Salad™” Yes, there are salads that are not classified as “Weight Management.” This is not one of them. Order this salad using its full, trademarked, name. Go ahead.
4. P.F. Chang’s “Hot Fish” This dish suffers from the opposite problem. There is just not enough information here. Who wants to tell someone they’d like some “Hot Fish?” Maybe “Catch of the Day” would have been better?
5. Cracker Barrel‘s “Uncle Herschel’s Favorite®” Apparently Uncle Herschel was a real guy, and a real uncle, but the creepiness of the name of this breakfast prevents us from ordering it. That, and the portion seems large enough that an appointment with a cardiologist should be included as a side.
6. Friendly’s “Super Sizzlin’™ Sausage Sunrise” We’re familiar with the “sausage sunrise,” and we keep telling them that we’re just not in the mood in the morning. It’s nothing personal.
7. Outback Steakhouse’s “Chocolate Thunder From Down Under®” This is just an incorrect use of words. There’s no other way to describe it.
We’re sure we’ve missed some. Add your suggestions to the comments and help us out!
IHOP’s “Rooty Tooty Fresh ‘N Fruity®” Here’s one where you just point at the menu and say, “I’ll have this.”
Bubba Gump’s “Bubba’s After the Storm Bucket of Boat Trash” We’ve seen “Deadliest Catch” and we’ll pass on this one.
Moe’s “Joey Bag of Donuts” It’s a burrito. Really.