Slim Jim Shortages Cause Widespread Turmoil, Healthy Sodium And Cholesterol Levels

If you’re noticing a lack of mechanically separated chicken and hydrolyzed corn gluten in your diet, you’re not alone. The tragic ConAgra factory explosion that killed three people near Raleigh, N.C. ended Slim Jim production until this fall. [Update: The factory is reopening on July 27.] It was the only place where the snack sticks are manufactured.

Citigroup analyst David Driscoll cut the stock to “hold” from “buy” due to the explosion, and was quoted as saying that Slim Jim generates $200 million in annual sales and $0.06 a share for ConAgra.

“Slim Jim loyalty is very high,” food industry consultant Jim Degan told the New York Post. “If you eat Slim Jims, you aren’t going to find brand B or C to be an acceptable substitute.”

It’s no tragedy, it’s true, but it shows how an accident in one factory can affect a major company—and, more importantly, corner stores across the country.

Sudden Shortage of Slim Jims Causes Widespread Panic [Minyanville]

(Photo: spidra)

Comments

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  1. Thassodar says:

    Snap into a Slim Jim!

  2. dohtem says:

    There are two kinds of “stick meat” (how I refer to them, not a euphemism) at convenience stores. Is Slim Jim the unwrapped ones that people rub their grubby hands all over instead of using the tongs?

  3. HiPwr says:

    We need a Meat Snack Czar to address this situation.

  4. Kyattsuai says:

    I couldn’t help but think of that tribute song that Macho Man Randy Savage did for the late Mr. Perfect. He should get back in the studio to rap about how much he misses Slim Jims.

    • I Love New Jersey says:

      @Kyattsuai: I know all those words, but that sentence makes no sense to me.

    • Yoko Broke Up The Beatles says:

      @Kyattsuai:

      Speaking of getting back in the studio, I’m waiting for the Macho Man’s follow-up diss to the Hulkster. I feel like there was some unanswered questions in his last LP.

  5. JoeDirt says:

    First the Fat Boys break up, now this.

  6. Applekid ┬──┬ ノ( ゜-゜ノ) says:

    Eh, just wait for the Meat Blimp.

  7. Chris Irvine says:

    I’d say the 3 dead is a bit tragic…..

  8. rpm773 says:

    By the time Big Slim Jim gets the production lines going again, their customers will have learned to get their fix with kielbasa.

  9. glater says:

    If you’ve had a slim jim since grade school, you’ll recall that they’re mostly made of plastic and sawdust anyways. Horrible little devices (food is the wrong word), they are. They have the texture of well-greased cardboard and the taste to match. Awful.

    Tragic about the people that got hurt and killed, but I think the world would be for the better without these abominations being sold as “meat”.

  10. Skin Art Squared says:

    I love Slim Jims. Especially the hot n’ spicy ones. And you are correct, there is no substitute.

  11. TCinIowa says:

    Why doesn’t President Obama release meat from the Strategic Slim Jim Reserve? For the love of God tell me we’ve got a Strategic Slim Jim Reserve. Kentucky and Mississippi each have 2 senators and we haven’t established a Strategic Slim Jim Reserve? DID WE LEARN NOTHING FROM HURRICANE KATRINA AND 9/11?????????

    • SpruceStreetPhil - in a new Pine flavor says:

      @TCinIowa: Well I learned that only fools think that 29°57′53″N 90°4′14″W will be land for quite some time. Yeah go ahead, go rebuild your house, I’m sure you’ll sit out the next one too and then the coasties will have to come along and cut a hole in your new house’s/house’s new roof to get you out… just like last time.

      pshh the Acadians/Cajuns knew something right when they built the French Corridor: only build things on land that is ABOVE sea level because no one, NO ONE, has the elite land making skills of the Dutch.

  12. TheUncleBob says:

    I’m off to go stock up on Slim Jims to resell on eBay. I’ll be rich!

  13. albear says:

    Step into a slim jim!!!!!

    *I swear, it was until the Slim Jim explosion last month that I found out that they sais snap and not step*

  14. I Love New Jersey says:

    Isn’t this basically a processed meat version of beef jerky?

  15. HomersBrain says:

    I feel pretty confident saying Slim Jims have killed more than three people

  16. polyeaster says:

    there are so many ways I could go wrong with a comment on Slim Jims/any of the previous comments:) >Resists< Slim Jims are the nasty hard-to-open packages of dried salty meat. That taste like chemicals. The world is now a better place…

  17. ReverendBrown says:

    It’s easy to ridicule the salty beef product, but with $200 million in annual sales… a lot of people based their livelihood on them. I don’t just mean factory workers or convenience store clerks, either. I’m talking doctors and nutrition specialists. They’ve got to have something easy to treat once in awhile. What will America do with inferior processed beef snack?

  18. Trai_Dep says:

    I’ll bet it was a warning shot across our bow by the North Koreans.
    First Slim Jims. Then the Internet. What’s next, Apple Pie?!

  19. TimeDoctor says:

    What the heck is this minyanville source?!

    from their about page:
    “THE MINYANVILLE PROMISE
    Secure Your Future: We will help you understand how the financial world works to make you more confident and successful.
    Feed Your Brain: We will provide our best thinking to make you smarter so you can make better decisions.
    Make You Smile: We will deliver it in a way that will help you laugh while you learn.”

    That doesn’t sound like a journalistic outlet to me.

  20. WarOtter - I went to Japan and all I got was this tumor. says:

    Somewhere, Macho Man Randy Savage is weeping as he loses the source of his power…

  21. MaelstromRider says:

    ConAgra gets an F for business continuity.

  22. Smashville says:

    I must be the only one on here that actually likes Slim Jims…they used to be a necessity when I’d go backpacking…

    • The Porkchop Express says:

      @Smashville: eventhough I doubt they contain more than 2% meat as I’ve stated prior…I love them. They’re never big enough though, I want it to actually hurt inside after only one.

    • calquist says:

      @Smashville: They are good for backpacking and road trips… but I’m more of a Beef Steak Nugget kind of girl.

  23. halothane says:

    Diss Slim Jims all you want, but as nasty as they may be, when you crave one, nothing else will hit the spot. Hell, they helped me get my blood pressure from a tragic 80/60 to a respectable 94/70!

  24. Baxterjones says:

    Sim Jims = meat gum

    Strange but delicious.

  25. evilhapposai says:

    Just noticed the beef part on the story’s label just says beef now. Guess they thought the beef heart part was going to frighten weak stomachs away. I used to love to point it out to people. Oh well, at least I still have the anchovies in Worcestershire sauce.

  26. Anonymous says: