Recall Roundup

Umbrellas, toy beach chairs, swingsets, and mysteriously collapsing benches. What do they have in common? All of them have been recalled for various reasons in the last month.

Home Depot patio umbrellas – may fall over unexpectedly after umbrella closes and hit someone. No, seriously.

Step2 Play Up Gym play sets (sold at Toys R Us) – swing hangers can break; risks sending child hurtling through the air in a very not-fun manner.


Gothic Cabinet Craft bunk beds
(sold in NY metropolitan area and NJ) – violate federal bunk bed safety standards; a child’s body can pass through spaces in guardrails, but not a child’s head. Scary.

Ely and Walker girls’ hooded sweatshirts – drawstring poses strangulation hazard.

Ross Stores benches – can collapse when weight is put on them. (No word on how much weight.) Bad feature in a bench.

Bicycles from Norco, Trek, and Cannondale due to potentially dangerous defects.

Build-A-Bear Workshop folding beach chairs – risk of injury (to humans) when folding chair shut

Comments

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  1. AlteredBeast (blaming the OP one article at a time.) says:

    Is it wrong that I find the recall roundup posts the funniest?

    • Nick1693 says:

      @AlteredBeast: Nope. I find it a clear reminder of how natural selection will be fought,

    • RandaPanda says:

      @AlteredBeast: I find it amusing how Laura is wording things on this recall round up. For example:

      “swing hangers can break; risks sending child hurtling through the air in a very not-fun manner.”

      Now, I’m sorry, when I was a kid, this WAS fun. If the swing broke and we went flying through the air only to land on our asses 10 feet away, we’d rig the swing up to do it again, and everyone would get a turn.

      • Laura Northrup says:

        @RandaPanda: See, I used to jump off swings and it was fun. But the CPSC fascists are all, “blah blah risk of injury.”

        Also, the recall implied that the fall happens when the kid sits down on the swing, not while swinging, which is way less fun.

  2. Fujikopez says:

    The link for the Build-A-Bear is for a bike.

  3. jaydez says:

    Can you rename this to the natural-selection roundup?

    If a kid is stupid enough to crawl though the bars… good.

    If you are too heavy to sit in a folding chair… good.

    If you you get hit by a falling umbrella, be more aware of your surroundings… but that would be freaking hilarious.

    How are all hoodie draw strings not strangulation hazards? If you get strangled by it you are the fail. Maybe this is why half the hoodies at Old Navy have no strings on them.

    And as for the bike thing… you should inspect you bike before and after you ride it every time… check for cracks, make sure everything is tight.

  4. HogwartsAlum says:

    Every single patio umbrella I’ve ever OWNED falls over when you close it and clonks you on the head.

    I can’t use one anymore because the damn wind destroys them. :P

  5. Anonymous says:

    I miss the Under Armour Athletic Cup (protective gear) from April 29, http://www.underarmour.com/productsafety which is “subject to breaking under certain circumstances” with one report of injury. That’s *not* the part where I would want any breaking to occur. But they’ve been good sending direct mail to all potential owners.

  6. oneandone says:

    By random coincidence, about 2 hours before this was posted I read the federal regulations on bunk beds (16 CFR 1501.18(a)(18) and 16 CFR 1513.2(c)). An instructor was using it a class. So serendipitous!