Enstrom Will Replace Your Almond Toffee If It Fails To Calculate Your Taxes

Bobby didn’t believe that Enstrom’s “Unconditional Guarantee” was truly unconditional, so he sent an email to Enstrom complaining that his Almond Toffee did not perform well as a tax preparer.

Bobby submitted the following through Enstrom’s web form:

Your Almond Toffee does not work well as a tax preparer. Per your unconditional guarantee, I formally request my monies to be refunded at the earliest possible date to:

[redacted]

Please confirm receipt of this email and the issuance of my refund at the earliest opportunity.

Best regards,

Bobby

Enstrom quickly replied:

Thank you for contacting Enstrom Candies Customer Care Department. We would be more then happy to replace the box of toffee as stated in our guarantee. Would you please provide your order number or customer number so I can do so?

To place an order, please contact Enstrom Candies Call Center at 1-800-367-8766 (24 hours 7 days a week) or visit our website at http://www.Enstrom.com. Should you need further assistance, please reply to our email or contact Customer Care Department at 1-800-367-8777.

Jessica Shaner
Customer Service Representative
Enstrom Candies

Wow, that is an unconditional guarantee! Bobby was shocked by the response, and since he isn’t a colossal jerk, he didn’t follow through with his request. The satisfaction that Enstrom would honor their guarantee was more than enough. Plus, we’re told that the toffee was excellent. Delicious work, Enstrom!

Comments

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  1. Ness says:

    Haha, I ate it all, but I was not satisfied!

    Good going on their part, and a good sense of humor. :D

  2. ryan89 says:

    Mine forgot a few small deductions, but it was worth it to not do it myself.

    Oh and Enstrom’s Almond Toffee is to die for! We get it every year at Christmas.

  3. mythago says:

    It probably performs as well as certain large chain tax preparers.

  4. KyleOrton says:

    Great, now Brian is going to get free toffee because it has poor grammar.

  5. Tank says:

    i wonder how many goofy requests they’ll get from people with no morals before they catch on?

    • Skybolt says:

      @Tank: It’s likely that they caught on before they started using this guarantee, and built that potential problem into the cost of the product. LL Bean, of course, has a return policy just like this and they’re doing great. I am more likely to buy from a company if I know that there is no way I will get screwed.

  6. NotAppealing says:

    Mmm… Thanks for the delicious looking tip.

  7. Nunya B says:

    This is what Gmail Goggles was invented for.

  8. crazydavythe1st says:

    It seems more likely that the CSR is trained to reply to anything inquiring about an unconditional guarantee with info about how to go about it, instead of actually reading complaints, don’t yall think?

    I would find it hard to believe that someone somewhere along the way wouldn’t flag this and say “no”.

    • kingmanic says:

      @crazydavythe1st: or, They’re company has a sense of whimsy and will honor their guarantee because they know there are fewer jerks with time on their hands to do this then people who appreciate the consumer friendly gesture.

      If the balance of jerks to customers grows too great they can just grandfather the guarantee.

  9. PrimaveraTydeus says:

    As someone who has gone to a 12-Step group to get over my addiction to Enstrom’s dark chocolate almond toffee, this thread made me call my sponsor so I wouldn’t rush downtown and buy (and eat) another pound of the stuff… seriously, it’s AMAZING.

  10. bossco says:

    some people have way too much time on their hands….kudos to the CSR.

  11. TVarmy says:

    This reminds me of the time I ate a bag of Doritos because I thought it would get me true love because of the 100% satisfaction guarantee. Sadly, after I ate them, my stomach was full, but my life was still empty. I was too angry and depressed to call the customer service number.

  12. Wubbytoes says:

    My grandmother occasionally mails my mom boxes of that stuff, and she knows to save me some or else. :p

    • kbrook says:

      @Wubbytoes: With my parents, it was the opposite. My aunt and uncle used to send them boxes, and into the freezer they’d go, for a special occasion. We all knew there would be death (instant or protracted, we never tried) if we got into the toffee before the special occasion.

  13. dakotad555 says:

    Dear Enstrom,

    I have consumed my entire box of delicious toffee, and am unsatisfied that there isn’t more left. Please refund my money (or just send me more toffee).

    Sincerely,

    Your customer

  14. stopNgoBeau says:

    I’m slow. Can someone tell me how this toffee relates to tax prep?

    • TheRealAbsurdist says:

      @stopNgoBeau: We could, yes…

    • witeowl says:

      @stopNgoBeau: Clearly not very well. Otherwise, Bobby surely would have not asked for a refund. You know, unless he was trying to make a point or something.

      • Applekid ┬──┬ ノ( ã‚œ-゜ノ) says:

        @witeowl: I beg to differ. The relation is very clear. Many a time I have purchased toffee and sat it down with a Schedule D and it did NOTHING. I turned its attention to a AMT worksheet and still it did nothing: no manufacturer I’ve ever known has ever stood behind their product.

        I will absolutely consider Enstrom toffee in the future, confident that if it fails at its primary task I can always return it. Now that’s someone that has confidence in their product.

    • shanoaravendare says:

      @stopNgoBeau: Sorry to be a spoilsport on the running joke guys but….

      The guarantee on the toffee is “unconditional” which means you can ask for your money back for pretty much whatever the heck reason you want. Bobby decided to be funny and see if they really meant it and asked for his money back because the toffee couldn’t do his taxes.

      No real relation at all, just humor.

  15. mike says:

    I have to say that this is awesome! I’ve returned backpacks to LL Bean because they were out of style and they gave me a refund!

    Companies like this should be praised! I *ALWAYS* tell my friends and family to purchase from LL Bean if possible, even if its pricey.

    • thetango says:

      @mike:

      “I’ve returned backpacks to LL Bean because they were out of style and they gave me a refund!”

      So … you’re basically ripping them off?

      • Gopher bond says:

        @thetango: L.L. Bean’s return policy states that their products are “guaranteed to give 100% satisfaction in every way”. That’s a pretty broad return policy. Out-of-fashion clothing seems perfectly within those bounds. Surely it could be taken to more extreme measures.

  16. drdom says:

    A client of mine started sending us Enstrom’s Toffee as a holiday gift a few years ago. Enstrom’s can afford to give an unconditional guarantee because the quality of the product is so exceptional, that I doubt they have to send much replacement product out. Their customer service is also exceptional. We now send it as holiday gifts as well.
    Consumers need to reward companies with standards like Enstrom’s with their business.

  17. Boulderite says:

    Enstrom toffee is the BEST TOFFEE!!! It practically melts in your mouth. We’ve always recieved great service from them.

  18. Geekybiker says:

    Kudos to them. I’m assuming they also have a high enough profit margin that they can afford to send out extra boxes without losing much (if any) money.

  19. UgoDawgkatt says:

    I have to add my comment too . . . it’s the best toffee you’ll ever have! I’m just glad there isn’t a location within driving distance or I’d be buying it weekly! When I order for gifts, I can’t help but include myself as part of the order. If you’ve never had their toffee, give yourself a personal gift!

  20. Jabberkaty says:

    Why did I look at the website? Sure, I wanted to read this unconditional guarantee, but now I have a toffee problem… Oh, cruel world.

  21. Phantom_Photon says:

    Impressive! A fantastic claim (a guarantee that is “unconditional”) can really improve a company’s sales.

    However, many companies are unwilling to follow through on these claims, because of the cost involved. This in turn, undermines the consumer’s confidence in the company, hurting the good publicity the original fantastic claim produced.

    This forward thinking and moral company has stepped up to honor their incredible guarantee, and in the process has generated even MORE good publicity in the process.

    Congratulations to Enstrom for not only doing the right thing, but also looking at the Big Picture!

  22. resonanteye says:

    totally going to buy toffee now, maybe it will do better with my taxes.