Packing Fudge: Woman Arrested For Stealing $70 Worth Of Fudge

A Maryland woman with a purse completely “packed” with fudge was arrested last week in the Maryland House Hotel where she was found, covered in chocolate and crying hysterically, on on a lobby sofa. The sofa was also stained with chocolate.

Catherine Anne Delgado, 35, had “chocolate smeared on her arms and shirt, and there was so much unwrapped chocolate in her purse that it was spilling out onto a hotel sofa.” Delgado had apparently tried to flush the bricks of fudge down a hotel toilet, which, according to the police report posted on The Smoking Gun, “stopped up the toilet.”

In addition to the fudge she had also stolen 5 M&M pretzel sticks. Half-eaten cookies were found at the scene of the crime. Someone call Encyclopedia Brown, there may be more to this case than meets the eye…

Fudge Packer Popped [The Smoking Gun via DListed]
(Photo:Annapolis Police Department)

Comments

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  1. n/a says:

    I guess you can say she really “fudged” up that criminal attempt.

  2. iMike says:

    Is this The Onion?

  3. dbeahn says:

    Welcome to http://www.TheCriminalist.com

    Seriously, what the heck is going on with this blog? Religion, hacking, cooky criminals, made up stories about call center reps with zero confirmation, stories that don’t make sense about cable techs. Everything except consumer issues.

  4. formergr says:

    And the story of a clearly mentally disturbed woman stealing food from a hotel is on Consumerist because…????

  5. Nicholai says:

    @iMike:

    I was thinking the same thing…

  6. DeeJayQueue says:

    Bugs Meany was behind it.

  7. Crazytree says:

    SHE LOOKS LIKE A GHETTO KIMORA SIMMONS.

  8. MissKissLock says:

    @crazytree-
    As opposed to the actual Kimora Simmons?

  9. Techguy1138 says:

    I’m not sure why this is here either.

    Are we supposed to get a laugh at her expense? I feel sad for this person. Her crime was pretty minor but it is obvious that she has quite a number of issues. I hope that she can get the assistance that she needs to overcome her mental anguish.

  10. Chongo says:

    @dbeahn: Hey, its all fun… go outside and take a breath of fresh air or something!

  11. gozilla09 says:

    Lol……fudge packer…

  12. pestie says:

    @dbeahn: Yeah! It’s almost like this is a blog rather than a newspaper!

    Hey, wait a second…

  13. Amelie says:

    The title is tasteless, especially considering I just finished dinner. What has a story about a woman with serious food issues that resulted in shoplifting, have to do with this site?

  14. Cowboys_fan says:

    She shoulda’ applied for a job. I had a friend who worked in a fudge store and got all the free fudge he wanted. (Of course, after a few weeks, he didn’t want any anymore)

  15. acambras says:

    Sad. Obviously this woman has some serious mental health issues.

    I did like the Encyclopedia Brown reference, though.

  16. Crazytree says:

    @Crazytree: whatchu talkin about willis?

    Kimora may be a skank ho… but she took a great mugshot… that kind of composure is hard to find when the cops have just found your coke stash.

    [drinkthis.typepad.com]

  17. jmschn says:

    @dbeahn: I definitely concur…although i have only recently joined that’s what ive always thought Consumerist was..75% tabloid, 25% consumer fighting!

  18. Chris Walters says:

    @COWBOYS_FAN: I agree. In high school I got to live out my childhood dream when I took a part time job scooping ice cream at the Baskin Robins in the mall. I’m surprised I didn’t put that store out of business. I have very low morals when it comes to ice cream.

    Now I know to just avoid those sorts of jobs.

  19. Greasy Thumb Guzik says:

    I thought only gay men could be fudge packers!

  20. pinkbunnyslippers says:

    “….where she was found, covered in chocolate and crying hysterically, on on a lobby sofa.”

    Sounds like someone was surfing the crimson wave!

  21. Maulleigh says:

    Poor thing. I think she’s got a story to tell at an O.A. meeting some day.

  22. FishingCrue says:

    I think we can attribute the differences in coverage to Ben’s vacation. Otherwise I’m afraid Consumerist has jumped the shark with this post.

  23. homerjay says:

    Two words: POSTING QUOTAS

  24. pine22 says:

    my only question would be why?

  25. welsey says:

    Oh come on, everyone here cries so much over everything they should really switch the articles to solely Kleenex-related.

    I don’t know how great this article being posted is, though. But I haven’t had any real issues with anything else. And it is just a blog, calm down!

  26. kweee says:

    I think we can attribute the differences in coverage to Ben’s vacation.

    Yeah, that’s why it’s so much better… though that ain’t saying much.

  27. hc5duke says:

    whoa, wait hold on a second this is a HUGE story… are you telling me they now make M&M pretzel sticks? when did this happen?

  28. boston214 says:

    Seriously, there must be better things to do than laugh at a woman who obviously has pretty major problems. I would have expected better.

  29. cde says:

    Encyclopedia Brown? More like Encyclopedia Dramatica…

  30. CumaeanSibyl says:

    For everybody complaining about how Consumerist doesn’t post enough consumer news, I’ll point out that the article about the CPSC’s resuscitation has a total of three comments on it, two of which are mine. So… for all the begging and pleading for more articles like that, nobody seems to actually like articles like that.

    At least, that’s how it looks when you’re measuring quantifiable statistics of site usage, like pageviews, comment numbers, and other things that help the operators decide what kind of stories to post. Even if Ben and Meghann read the thread on this article and see that people hate it, they can see that people are willing to argue about this article in a way they won’t on the other one. Arguments mean more hits, and more hits mean they get to keep their jobs.

    Lord knows I hate blaming the victim, but in this case, reader response determines site content — so yeah, it’s kind of our fault.

  31. Crazytree says:

    don’t you feel bad for this lady at least?

    talk about hitting rock bottom.

  32. silenuswise says:

    @Crazytree: Yes, although I have to admit the post’s title made me laugh when I first read it, the picture of the woman makes me feel very sad. It just reeks of randomness and desperation–why steal fudge? Does she have bipolar disorder?

  33. ToadKillerDog says:

    Well she definitely was a consumer!

  34. lestat730 says:

    chocolate is her smack.

  35. mantari says:

    @homerjay: Two words repeated — POSTING QUOTAS :(

  36. timmus says:

    I actually feel sorry for her… she evidently has a few screws loose and needs some help.

  37. faust1200 says:

    When you go to Consumerist.com school the first rule is: anytime you can get in a salacious title like “Packing Fudge:” you must go with the story. And I for one welcome our new fudge packing overlords. Or is it: I’m tired of these motherfucking crazies in my motherfucking fudge. Or step 1: pack fudge step 2: ?? step 3: profit. Take your pick. It’s all fudgilicious.

  38. DanPhilpott says:

    ENCYCLOPEDIA BROWN! What an excellent reference. Their really aren’t enough references to him in popular culture. And we could use some more kids (and adults) who aspire to an encyclopedic knowledge to see them through their lives.

    Are The Three Investigator references up next?

    (As for article selection: All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.)

  39. shoegazer says:

    @DanRP: What about Wikipedia Brown?

  40. rekoil says:

    Ah, my hometown represent. :)

    Annapolis is a great tourist town, no so great of a living town…

  41. evilfremen says:

    I live in the area and read the local news police report. Some of the orginal story has been left out here. Apparently, when she arrived at the hotel she had claimed she was sexually assulted. The police investigated, found she had fabricated the story, saw the chocolate every where, become suspicious. They investigated near by and found the store broken into, and when they went back to confront her, thats when they found her flushing fudge down toilet.

  42. fulanoche says:

    Ben’s on vacation. Is this the Consumerist/Onion?

    There’s nothing wrong with a differnt type article once in a while.

    Keep up the good work.

  43. MalichiDemonos says:

    I know when I make fudge I usually put it into the toilet.
    So the consumerist warning for this story is… fudge may cause historical behavior???

  44. dbeahn says:

    @MalichiDemonos: Hell yes, if it’s historical fudge.

  45. oudemia says:

    @rekoil: I lived in Nap-Town for four years (college). At least then there were still in-town services for non-tourists, like a pharmacy and a grocery. Now it’s just, well, fudge shops and keychain stores.

  46. nightshadowon says:

    Tell me how the story ends?

    What I was thinking… (in my mind role played my Pamela Anderson)… She was naked rolling around in chocolate in the hotel room. The porter enters bringing her baggage. She says “come here big boy and help me pack my fudge”… Then the old 70s porno music kicks in.

    Ok, we men are weird, but have good imaginations and can turn anything we see or hear into a porno in our minds :)

  47. Pelagius says:

    Suggestion for your next headline: Consumerist readers found with 10 pounds of sand packed in their va-jay-jays.

  48. Consumer-X says:

    I think by definition a “consumer” at this site is one who exchanges something of value for something of value in return such as $9 cash for a 1.75 liter bottle of Val-U-Rite vodka. Thieves are not consumers at this site. This article should have been posted at shoplifterist.com instead.

  49. MalichiDemonos says:

    @dbeahn: Sorry about that… i ment “Hysterical behavior”. MS word cant read my mind while i’m typing words wrong. At least i dont think it can…
    Shoot!!! Wheres my tinfoil hat?!

  50. thedreamingtree says:

    I’d rather someone be smeared in fudge with a made-up story than smeared in crap (remember Tawana Brawley?)

  51. TCameron says:

    I Hope that Fudge wasn’t part of the Chinese poison train. Toot! Toot!

  52. TCameron says:

    I hope that fudge wasn’t part of the Chinese poison train. Toot! Toot!

  53. I think the poster was having a laugh with the title as ‘packing fudge’ is a homosexual term for anal sex. Next an article about “Madame La Palma and her 5 daughters?”

  54. IC18 says:

    Damn fudge-Aholics.

  55. rg says:

    Poor thing…honey it’s GREEN card, not BROWN card!

  56. frankieman70 says:

    That is awesome, I love our country.

  57. Does this really worthy to be posted here in Consumerist.com?

    Come on, people, have some quality control!

    [www.tian.cc]

  58. jrdnjstn78 says:

    ymmmmmmm fudge!

  59. scootinger says:

    I think she stole a lot more than $70 worth of fudge….it’s usually really expensive.

    “Delgado was charged with swiping ten fudge loafs valued at about $70 and five M&M pretzels worth $19.45.”

    Looks like she probably stole nearly $800 worth of stuff from this store.

  60. Jesus On A Pogo Stick says:

    @Pelagius: I totally just spit my water all over myself. That was great.

    Seriously people, this was supposed to be funny. You know, haha. Big deal if it isn’t about consumers and CEOs bendind poor people over. IT IS FUNNY! LAUGH!

    Well…. and sad. Poor lady needs some help.

  61. jesirose says:

    This has absolutely nothing to do with consumerism! A woman with an eating disorder stole chocolate and had a breakdown. BFD. (no seriously, it is, she obviously needs help) What the hell is it doing here?

    Maybe you guys need to reread your FAQ. This story reads a lot more like sensationalist crap about people doing stupid things, than anything to do with consumerism. Oh wait, I get it, she consumed the chocolate? Right.