New Burgers Turn Hearts Into Hand Grenades

With yellowish cholesterol practically spraying out of the pores of the average American, what are the nation’s fast food purveyors doing to stop it? They’ve pulled out the mop and bucket, wiped it off the floor, then used the wringer to drip it back into the next burger they sell you.

For example, take Burger King’s Meatnormous Omelete Sandwich. two slices of fluorescent cheese, two chicken ovums and half a hog on a toasted bum. 740 calories. Or Hardee’s Monster Thickburger — a cow cut in half, greased with bacon and slathered in mayonnaise and cheese. 1420 calories.

When I go home to the States every year, I have a “things to eat” list. These sandwiches just made bullet points 1 and 2.

Fat Dude Nation [Stay Free Daily]

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  1. misskaz says:

    This post made me go to Mickey Ds for lunch. I saw that picture and instantly craved the nastiness that is fast food – in my case, in the form of 3 premium chicken strips with ranch dressing, fries, and a root beer. I justified it because I ran a 3.5 mile race last night and got a promotion at work today, but really it’s all The Consumerist’s fault. Damn you.

  2. CTSLICK says:

    Burger King’s Meatnormous Omelete Sandwich comes with a 20% off coupon for your next defibrillation ….mmmmm I can feel my arteries hardening now.

  3. matto says:

    I lived in Tokyo for three years, and for some reason, the one thing I missed from the good ol US of A was Taco Bell. I can’t describe to you the insatiable, maddening pangs of unrequited longing for a Burrito Supreme which I suffered.

    On my vacation trips back to the states, I’d often hit the TB right after picking up my rental car at the airport. I also became skilled at convincing friends to mule back sacks of the goopy ersatz mexican goodness when they went on trips, too.

    I’m not sure what this has to do with the latest round of fast-food breakfast sandwich announcments, but typing this was a lot more fun than doing work.

  4. Clare says:

    At my old job, there was a birthday budget for my department. You could choose to have bagels for breakfast or sheet cake at lunchtime on your birthday. Our VP played favorites something fierce, so he let his favorite favorite get the Meatnormous Omlette Sandwiches for everyone in the department.

    I got laid off from that job.

    I hate the Meatnormous Omlette Sandwich.

  5. geek 101 says:

    cant resist sandwich porn…….

    on i side note there just trying to capture the sucess of the supream omlet at dunkin dounts