Online dating site eHarmony.com does not want Tamsem (pictured) as a member. Based on its extensive personality profile, eHarmony found her unsuitable for any of its tens of thousands of members.
It’s not that she’s legally separated from a spouse, like that guy in California who’s suing eHarmony, nor is it her shiny red locks nor that she’s a part time model.
She wondered, was she simply unattractive? Unlovable? Does eHarmony hate Canadians?
Nope, it’s something far worse…
I just wanted to add to your story regarding John Claasen’s claim against eHarmony.
I, too, have been discriminated against by eHarmony though for a different reason.
I don’t believe there’s anything really wrong with me. I think I’m a fairly well-adjusted, healthy, edumacated, fun, hopefully interesting writer and part time model here in Toronto and yet, based on my personality profile, I was completely rejected by eHarmony. They said something to the effect that I was not suitable for any of their (1000′s and 1000′s) of members.
Let me tell you, that was a blow that I did not need after having a seriously tricky time out in the dating world. In my pea brained head, that basically said to me that not one of the men on their vast member list would like me – it was pretty disheartening and has really put a dent in my dating confidence.
I was down for a week or so, pondering my basic attractiveness to men in general when it dawned on me that it might be a discrimination thang. By that I mean, I am an atheist (or agnostic, when the mood strikes me) and I did not hide that fact when I went through their ‘personality test’ (that I obviously failed – I should have studied harder??). However, I did not say that I would only date like-minded men, I clearly checked off the boxes on Catholics, Presbyterians, Anglicans, and demon-worshippers as men that I would be more than happy to take home to mum and dad. My suspicion was confirmed when I asked a Christian friend if she knew anything about eHarmony and, if so, did she know if it was a religious site. she said that it was and that I should take my heathen ways to another site… ok, the last part isn’t true, but she did say that it was a religious site.
So, I was feeling better that I was being simply discriminated based on my lack of religion and not that I was a horrid person who was completely unlovable. Hey, wait a minute, I hear that Americans are pretty big on people not being able to discriminate against others based on their religion (or lack thereof). Hmmm, now it sounds like I have the same claim as John Claasen “discrimination at the hands of eHarmony”.
I don’t think that I’m desperate, just disappointed (especially by the fact that I didn’t print out their assessment of my personality and their resounding rejection).
We suggest that Tamsen email eHarmony and ask why they rejected her profile. Who knows, maybe it was a technical glitch and with a few swift keystrokes, she can be back in the club. Or maybe she’s right, a site founded by a devout Christian, espousing certain Christian values, really doesn’t like redheads.
Previously: Married Man Sues E-harmony.com For a Date