Did you know carrots used to be purple? It’s true — their distinctive fluorescent oranginess was bred into them by Dutch carrot breeders in the 18th century. Likewise, did you know sausages are initially purple? Drive your fist through the loins of a squealing sow, then pull out a steaming spool. See? Gross, but truth is stranger than fiction.
As you may know, we at the Consumerist are very much against the “unnatural” in our foodstuffs. We’re weary of scientists playing God by making what we eat more aesthetically appealing. Sausages are just bowels stuffed with offal anyway — we all know it, why pretty it up?
Luckily, some intrepid New Zealand sausage makers are on our wave length, and have decided to start selling purple sausages the way YHWH intended. The sausages — technically cocktail weenies — are called Purplos. And yes, we’re just kidding, this is fucking disgusting.