I pulled out of the lot, turned left, and I wasn’t more than 200 yards away when a cop comes up behind me, lights flashing. I knew I couldn’t have been speeding so I was genuinely confused. He said the woman at the United Dairy Farmers said I drove off without paying for gas.
This guy was trying to make strawberry jam this morning, and he had to go buy 4 bags of sugar. The cashier threw away the original receipt but put the sugar in a couple of Wal-Mart shopping bags, so Ben left the store thinking everything was, you know, normal for a Saturday morning. Then he was stopped by a security guard, a store manager, and an off-duty police officer, all of whom went batshit crazy on Ben over his 4 bags of sugar and lack of receipt. Before it was over one of the shopping bags was ripped open, a bag of sugar lay broken open on the parking lot, the guard had threatened to kick Ben’s ass, and the police officer said, “you’d better not be lying to me.” Ben was marched back into the store so they could verify with his cashier that he wasn’t a sugar thief. Welcome to Wal-Mart, the police-state superstore where prices are low and civil rights don’t exist.