Ben Davis was 348 lbs and depressed. At the bottom of his hole and sick of being single, he called up his brother and said, “I need to get my life together.” His brother said, “All right, I’m signing us up for a 5k. It’s in three weeks.”
According to Rolling Stone, when M.I.A.’s new album comes out later this year, there will be a track on it called “I’m Down Like Your Internet Connection”–and it will feature “Filipino Verizon workers singing the hook.”
“Save a part of your income and begin now, for the man with a surplus controls circumstances and the man without a surplus is controlled by circumstances.” – Henry H Buckley
If you’re down in the dumps and have nowhere else to turn, consider this collection of congratulatory remarks dubbed over applause. Only $24.95! But wait, if you order right now, you’ll also get some, uh, pewter puzzle pieces?