health

First Benzene Soda Lawsuits

First Benzene Soda Lawsuits

The Benzene scandal is starting to escalate, as Massachusetts and Florida consumers press class-action lawsuits against soda companies.

Washington Post Op-Ed Likens Obese To Air Pollution

Washington Post Op-Ed Likens Obese To Air Pollution

There’s a hilarious op ed piece up at the Washington Post, equating fat people with air pollution. Not the strange gases emitted simultaneously with the obese’s impressive spectrum of farting noises. The fat people themselves.

MERCK Gets Mercked for $9 Million in Vioxx Suit

MERCK Gets Mercked for $9 Million in Vioxx Suit

A jury awarded $9 million in punitive damages to John Darby who blamed his heart attacks on Vioxx. The sum is a defeat for drug-maker Merck, which, for some fucking reason, was assumed to be “bulletproof” because the trial took place in New Jersey.

Stem Cells Attained From Mice Testicles

Stem Cells Attained From Mice Testicles

A team of German scientists have developed a new source for embryonic stem cells: your taint.

Benzene In Soda Is Cancerous

Benzene In Soda Is Cancerous

Watch out, that next can of carbonated fizzy water you guzzle could turn your esophagus into a tumorous pipe oozing with cancer and bile. The carcinogen in question is Benzene and according to Beverage Daily, benzene levels in most soft drinks are up to five times the World Heath Organization’s limit for drinking water.

Freaks, Geeks And Aspergers: “Don’t Tell Women They Look Fat.”

Freaks, Geeks And Aspergers: “Don’t Tell Women They Look Fat.”

Are you a highly functioning autistic with severely impaired social skills? Yeah, so are we. And, like many of our fellow Aspergerians, we’ve often taken time out from building Rube-Goldberg-like fusion reactors in our Mom’s basement to lament our poor success rate with the ladies. Even for the normal man, saying the right thing to a woman is a game of Russian Roulette, only instead of a bullet in the face, you find your testicles under heel to a grinding stiletto. But what if you can never manage to say the right thing?

Dr. Frankenstein Makes Bacon Good For You!

Dr. Frankenstein Makes Bacon Good For You!

We know this is disgusting, but one of our favorite sandwiches is the peanut butter and bacon sandwich. It’s as simple as it sounds: fry up some bacon. None of the ham-like, Canadian or rasher variety — the crispier the better. Next, place it between two pieces of bread and slather this inside with a gooey layer of crunchy peanut butter. If you’d like, lightly grill it in a buttered frying pan.

Jon Stewart on Trucker Bombs

Jon Stewart on Trucker Bombs

We’re sure you’re as fascinated by the trucker bomb phenomenon as we are. Honestly, we are seriously considering making our next Consumerist photo contest dedicated to them, or perhaps merely a contest to see who can send the most trucker bombs to Poppy Z. Brite’s house in payback for the many literary trucker bombs she’s forced us all to endure over the years. Note to Poppy’s attorneys over at CyberTrialLawyer.com: just kidding!

Less Mad Cow Testing For Everyone!

Less Mad Cow Testing For Everyone!

Despite the fact that over the last couple of months there have been several reports of U.S. cattle infected with Mad Cow’s Disease, the USDA intends to ramp down its testing of American cattle herds, not ramp it up.