Justin sent us this gamepiece he scraped like a wet scab off the side of his moist Subway beverage cup. (I do not like gamepieces affixed to fast food drinks.) We’re in awe at its nearly k?an-like phrasing. How is an instant win not an instant winner? How do you peel the gamepiece that has already been peeled? Feel free to use these in your meditations.
Normally we wouldn’t rely on the phrase “third largest bank failure of the year” to impress upon you the seriousness of a situation, but since we’re at our 81st bank failure of 2009, we’re going to go with it. Meet Guaranty Bank of Texas. It has now failed.
A Consumer Reports Insights story in the Washington Post evaluates the DIY teeth-whitening racket, finding strips work better than trays, which don’t always fit in your mouth so well, the products may mess with your sensitive teeth, and that yellow teeth whiten easier than gray, brown or blue.
What can you do if you’re too small to have a shot in our Worst Company In America contest, but too awful to not earn some sort of notoriety? Well, you can get your BBB membership revoked and earn a big fat F ranking. It’s no golden poo, but it’s a start.
New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg told the Daily News that the residents of the swanky failed-condo-turned-homeless-shelter shouldn’t get too comfortable. They’ll need to move on.
Target continues its rebranding as the Duchamp of retail stores, with this receipt that indicates savings where no savings ever existed. Or perhaps multi-dimensional savings; we can’t pretend to know what Target sees when it stares into the void. Mark notes, “The cookies were on sale, as indicated. The cascade, I had a coupon for it to be free. Total savings should be $4.23. The receipt says $7.37. Maybe it’s a conspiracy since it is the Love Field (near the airport) in Dallas where Southwest flies only 737s.” That’s as good an explanation as any, Mark. Maybe you should work for Target?
(Thanks to Jess!)
Did you know the asterisk in the Macy*s logo is actually part of a clever branding campaign to associate the brand with fine print? It must be true, because no other department store has such a love of fine print on coupons—and such an apparent hatred of actual coupons. Their latest masterpiece in exclusions won’t cover electronics, wigs, mattresses, shoes, watches, about a million clothing brands, and more. What does it cover? Probably a shoehorn from the Notions for Men department.
Want to provide some feedback to Yum! Brands, the company behind KFC, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell, Long John Silver’s, and A&W Restaurants? No matter how old you are—they go back as far as Jan 1st, 1906—they’ll tell you that you’re too young to use the “Contact Us” part of their website. Yum! is in it for the long haul, and they don’t need a bunch of jibber-jabber from hooligans like you.