Daryl’s insurance company charged a closed checking account for a premium on a policy he’d already canceled, then tried to stick him with the bounced check fee.
executive email carpet bombs
Mike forgot to pay off the balance of a purchase he made on a Best Buy/HSBC credit card by the no-interest deadline and faced more than $500 in charges. On a whim, he followed our advice for launching an Executive Email Carpet Bomb and Jedi mind-tricked Best Buy into forgetting about the interest.
It took an Executive Email Carpet Bomb to convince Best Buy to replace Bryan’s Panasonic LiFi LCD Projection TV after it ate through four lamps. Bryan had purchased Best Buy’s extended warranty, which contains a no lemon clause that promises a replacement after three failed repairs. Best Buy conveniently insisted that replacing the broken lamp did not count as a “qualified repair.” Bryan first escalated his complaint through normal channels; when he had no other choice, he launched the mighty EECB.
Jiffy Lube agreed to pay Alison over $250 after botching routine work that forced her to interrupt her road trip for emergency car repairs. Alison’s mechanic said that Jiffy Lube’s attempted transmission fluid flush could have caused “catastrophic car damage” if left unfixed. Jiffy Lube denied all responsibility until Alison fired off an Executive Email Carpet Bomb to C.E.O. Rick Altizer, who agreed not only to reimburse for the repairs, but refunded the original cost of the transmission fluid flush, and tossed in a few coupons for free oil changes.
Do not launch an Executive Email Carpet Bomb against your own company or it will explode in your face. Reader E discovered this the hard way when he tried to use an E.E.C.B. to convince the bank where he worked to reverse $300 worth of overdraft fees.
Josh chopped down Duke Energy‘s thicket of phone trees by launching the mighty Executive Email Carpet Bomb. He had a simple request: turn on the power to his construction site. Calling the main customer support number led to a series of thirty-minute waits while listening to Duke’s cheerful computer voice promise that he would hold “for no longer than one minute.” He also sent six emails to Duke’s customer service inbox, all of which were ignored. Finally, after three weeks without power, Josh tracked down executive contact info for Duke’s executives and fired off an EECB. Five minutes later, his problem was solved.
Reader Michael wants to know why it’s taking UPS almost a month to ship his daughter’s Christmas gift from Los Angeles to Seattle. Michael thinks his package might have been eaten by the snowstorm that broke Seattle a few weeks back, but UPS swears that they have the gift and that this is all a simple matter of “the driver forgot to put it on the truck.” Worried that it that it might have been faster for a messenger to walk between Los Angeles and Seattle with his daughter’s present, Michael decided to launch an Executive Email Carpet Bomb at UPS executives.
You might think driving to a Time Warner office, filling out transfer forms, and copying your IDs—twice—might convince Time Warner to change the name on your bill; but you would be wrong.
Reader S knows his stuff when it comes to his rights as an airline passenger. He was flying on American Airlines (AA) and takeoff was delayed. AA said it was because of thunderstorms in Dallas. He called a friend in Dallas and they said “there isn’t a cloud in the sky.” AA later revealed the flight was actually delayed because they were waiting for a fax. It’s understandable why AA lied. Since this was something they had control over, it meant they owed several things to the delayed passengers. By lying and saying it was due to the weather, they could escape their obligation. The flight finally took off but reader S missed his connection and had to stay overnight in a hotel, a hotel room that American should have paid for. Inside, the letter S executive email carpet bombed after two customer service reps refused to listen to his story on the phone and an online form sent back a robotic received reply with no real results.
To Whom It May Concern: