Ashley Madison Offering Profile Photo Masks, Rendering Users Completely Unrecognizable To Their Loved Ones

"I know the guy on the right is Bob from accounting... but who are those other guys?!?"

“I know the guy on the right is my husband of 16 years, Bob … but who are those other guys?!?”

Isn’t it creepy when your husband/boyfriend leaves the room for a second, and then a stranger with a mask over his eyes enters it right after, and you’re like, “Whoa! Who are you and what have you done with my husband/boyfriend?!” Because everyone knows that disguises that only cover half your face can fool loved ones into thinking you’re a total stranger, Ashley Madison is offering users new tools to keep their identities secret.

For users who are feeling “shy” or just don’t want to get caught using the site for cheaters — say, if the company suffers another massive hack attack that leaks their identities — Ashley Madison has some solutions to keep their profiles discreet, reports CNNMoney.

Because profile photos are a good idea for attracting suitors on any dating site, Ashley Madison is offering the option of a brown or black mask that can be slapped on a profile photo; four levels of photo blurring (for those who can’t use Photoshop themselves); and a black bar that can be placed over a user’s eyes in a photo.

“We respect your need for discretion so we’ve added some tools to keep your identity a secret,” reads a special box on Ashley Madison’s new profile page. “Upload a new photo and you will have the option to crop it and add a mask!”

What, no Clark Kent glasses?

At the time Ashley Madison it was hacked, the company promised members it would beef up security protocols. It’s unclear whether this is intended to be an actual extra layer of security or someone has been watching too many romantic comedies involving masquerade balls and mixed up identities.

Read Comments2

Edit Your Comment

  1. LauraNorthrup says:

    Eyes Wide Shut. Someone has definitely seen Eyes Wide Shut too many times.

  2. limbo says:

    Wait, didn’t the hack expose one particular fact; that it’s 99.95% men looking for women who aren’t on the site?