Yes, There Is A Toaster That Will Toast Your Likeness Onto Bread

It's you! On bread.

It’s you! On bread. (burntimpressions.com)

As if splashing your selfie over social media isn’t enough, self-indulgence can now be obtained to an even higher degree by literally indulging in your own face, by way of toast. A novelty toaster company is selling custom toasters that sear your likeness onto bread, thereby providing an easy way to eat your own face, covered in butter. This is getting weird, sorry.

The Vermont Novelty Toast Corp. has been making novelty toasters since 2010, tweaking the appliances to toast logos and letters. Things are getting more complicated now, with in-depth graphics and the human face.

The founder of the company says the idea hit him a few months ago while he was trying to engrave a plate with a photo of his son.

“It came out great,” Galen Dively tells ABC News. “He loved it! And then he ate it.”

Here’s how it works: Customers submit photos, which he then downloads and tinkers with to make sure the photos will work on toast — manipulating color and contrast, and taking out background elements. The computer then turns those images into files that a plasma cutter can read.

“We just press some buttons and [the selfie] is cut out of sheet metal,” he explains, and those are inserted into the toasters. The appliances sell for $75 a pop and ship for free.

And there are some best practices users should employ when attempting to toast their faces, he adds.

“You want to choose a bread that’s not very airy. White bread works really well, but I’ve used Ezekiel bread. It all depends on the design, too. If the design has more fine details, then you really want to get a fine-grain bread.”

I always saw myself as a fine-grained kind of gal anyway.

You’re Toast: Company Will Stamp Your Face on Sliced Bread [ABC News]

Want more consumer news? Visit our parent organization, Consumer Reports, for the latest on scams, recalls, and other consumer issues.