While it took an enraged Dunkin’ Donuts customers eight minutes to express her extreme displeasure at not receiving a receipt, other bad consumers are bit more, shall we say — concise? with their vituperative rants. To wit: A very rude man who is beyond consolation at the mere presence of cheese on his burger. He makes his case to an unlucky Wendy’s employee in a quick 57 seconds and boy, is it a doozy. 

“I need my money back and I want it FAST,” the man begins while standing at a drive-thru Wendy’s window. And while we can’t hear the employee’s response, that was apparently not good enough for the man, who goes on to politely (ha, just kidding! He’s rude to the extreme!) explain the difference between a hamburger and a cheeseburger in the below video, via Guyism.

WARNING: Some language may be NSFW so pop your headphones on or put your earbuds in.

“Double HAMBURGER — is there cheese in hamburger? There’s NO CHEESE IN HAMBURGER!” he screams. “When you have a cheeseburger you have a cheeseburger, if you have a hamburger, you have hamburger.”

Oh, okay. Understandable — perhaps he doesn’t want to eat cheese and no one is forcing him to do so. And yes, his order should be correct. So, what does he want?

“I want my money back, I want my money back now, and I want it fast.”

His demands are clear — no cheese, and his money, fast and now. But the rest of his order wasn’t right either, causing him to lose his mind and admit to as much.

“There’s not even bacon on this, there’s not onion on this — there’s not anything that I asked for. This is so incompetent. It happens every time I come here. I’m losing my shit because this happened the past three times I’ve come. PLEASE, be competent. For once in your life, ONCE. Take an order, and FILL IT. God dammit.”

On receiving an unspecified sum of money from the employee: “I paid more than this! I want 10 bucks! You goddamn sons of bitches.”

And with that, he drops the mic, as it were, and stalks off.

While we don’t think any of our readers would ever get this worked up over the presence of cheese, please remember the golden rule of Consumerist: Kill’em with kindness. Being calm, reasonable and polite will get you a lot farther in life, and likely won’t result in a video of you acting like a total butthead going viral on the Interwebs.

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