Your Morning Cup Of TSA Backwash

American citizen with free time declines both backscatter scan and patdown upon re-entering country, ends up being able to walk through security without doing either even after cops are called. [NO BLASTERS!]
TSA head makes ad explaining why there’s nothing to fear. Message belied by ominous grey background. [YouTube]
Reporter goes through pat-down to show us how easy it is. “He uses the back of his hand to check the front of my groin area.” [KDAF]
An “I’ll be groped for Christmas” holiday jingle. [YouTube]
Man opts for third choice: stripping down to his skivvies. Is then arrested and walked through two terminals in his underwear. [NBC San Diego]
SNL reimagines TSA as a sexy 80’s hookup company. [Hulu]