Watch A Man Subject Himself To Four Loko In The Name Of Journalism

There’s been a lot of talk lately about Four Loko and whether or not the mix of energy drink and alcohol is dangerous or irresponsible. There’s also some concern about whether or not the beverage is marketed to kids. One brave soul decided to subject himself to several cans of the potent potable, then tested his ability to recite Shakespeare, play Call of Duty, and flirt with a lady. Let’s watch.

Spoiler Alert: We especially enjoy the way he concludes that it’s not really that bad — but can’t remember if he finished all of it or not.

[via Daily]


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  1. GuyGuidoEyesSteveDaveâ„¢ says:

    I wonder how kittehs and puppehs would respond to this product….

  2. PhineasNanerpuss says:

    tried one of these things at a party just to try it, most foul thing I’ve ever tasted.

    • SecretShopper: pours out a lil' liquor for the homies Wasp & Otter says:


    • cymph says:

      At least you were at a party, I bought one on purpose ’cause watermelon malt beverage sounded delicious. Absolutely horrible – I was daring others to try it… no one would.

      • Groanan says:

        If you thought that sounded good I strongly suggest the Honey Run Winery’s blackberry, cherry, cranberry, or elderberry honeywine (mead). (I think elderberry is the best)

        And if you are of less discriminating taste, I would also suggest some Strawberry Boone’s Farms.

  3. Doubts42 says:

    The media is getting really stupid about 4 loko.
    here in Dallas there was a story in the papers yesterday about a 14 year old kid who was drunk when he, his girlfriend, and another kid stole a parents SUV and took off for Oklahoma. they wrecked and the girlfriend was killed.
    Yesterday it was a page 2 story. Today the friend told reporters they had put away a few 4Loko’s along wiht a couple six packs of beer. Now it is a front page story about how 4Loko kills. It was still a drunken 14year old at the wheel, but of you listen to the MSM then he would have been fine if they were drinking Jack Daniels or a cabernet, but because it was the latest gimmick drink it is front page news.

    • ChuckECheese says:

      What I find most disturbing about the story you reference is that the kids decided to go to Oklahoma. Four Loko must create brain damages.

    • xxmichaelxx says:

      Agreed. Vodka+Red Bull has been the drink of choice for half of Las Vegas tourists for a decade.

      There’s nothing this drink will do that any other alcoholic drink will not also do.

    • falnfenix says:

      they’re proposing a ban in Maryland…lulz.

  4. bdcw says:

    And, how is this better than an Irish Coffee?

    • fsnuffer says:

      In an Irish Coffee most of the alcohol evaporates before you can drink it due to the hot coffee

      • donopolis says:

        LOL! No…sorry you don’t like the whiskey on fire and burn it off in a Irish coffee…it is served hot but not boiling…much the same as a hot toddy…the alcohol is very much still present.

        • Im Just Saying says:

          Also studies have shown the alcohol doesn’t “burn” off as we believe and that unless you slow cook for hours upon hours, most of the alcohol is still present through normal cooking methods.

      • Back to waiting, but I did get a cute dragon ear cuff says:

        Uh, no. Alcohol has a boiling point of 172 degrees. Not even McDonalds serves coffee that hot.

        One of the best drunk nights I ever had was walking around Georgetown in DC with a friend looking for the perfect Irish Coffee. We discovered 2 things:

        1) You can do a LOT of walking after 4 or 5.

        2) Creme de Menthe is just foul in one

      • Chaosium says:

        “In an Irish Coffee most of the alcohol evaporates before you can drink it due to the hot coffee”

        Coffee isn’t hot enough to evaporate the alcohol, unless you spend 10-20 minutes with the coffee on a continuous boil.

        You should probably cook more!

      • humphrmi says:

        I used to think that too, then someone (on Consumerist) posted this :

        Scroll down a bit, and there’s a chart that outlines the retained alcohol in various cooking situations. Add alcohol to boiling liquid: 85% of the alcohol is retained. Even flaming it leaves 75%.

  5. dulcinea47 says:

    The thing is, even if they stop making pre mixed alcoholic energy drinks, people will still continue to mix them themselves as they have been for years.

    Personally I would never drink that crap. My friend’s cousin had a heart attack and died at age 22 after drinking too much vodka & red bull.

    • evnmorlo says:

      If he was having sex at the time it would be a perfect death

      • darcmosch says:

        I’m surprised he didn’t get laid. You see him mackin on that chick dawg?! He was gonna hit that. His bros prolly rooster-blocked that mofo cuz he was gettin sum!

    • eccsame says:

      Weird! My friend’s cousin brought a chihuahua back from Mexico and when she got home, discovered it was a giant sewer rat! And the thing she thought was a pimple exploded and baby spiders came out because a spider had laid eggs in her skin.

      • theblackdog says:

        I think we have the same cousin, because mine bought a cactus in Mexico and when she brought it home it started moving, then it exploded and baby tarantulas came pouring out of it!

  6. cash_da_pibble says:

    I had one of these a month ago and didn’t realize it was THIS!
    I saw it in the liquor store and -always keen on trying new things- I said “Well, It’s watermelon flavored. how bad can it be? Besides, if it’s terrible I only lose $3. “

    Well, I did not finish it.
    It tasted like watermelon cologne.

  7. Lollerface says:

    How is this different than Red Bull and Vodka, available at any bar?

    • davemei83 says:

      That’s my thought exactly. Same thing with Jagerbombs…

      • Im Just Saying says:

        Primarily quantity and price. There’s more caffeine and a much cheaper price point for four loko than your average vodka redbull.

        • Zachary Jacob Zblewski says:

          How many milligrams of caffeine are in and ounce of each? I doubt Loko has much more than Red Bull. And I don’t see many people having just one vodka/energy on a night out. Yeah Loko comes in a big can. A bottle of vodka and a case of red bull is still bigger.

          And how is price/quantity different? Only rich people should be able to drink caffeine with their alcohol? Screw the poor man!

  8. Alvis says:

    We have GOT to get this stuff out of stores. I mean, what’s next, rum and Coke pre-mixed in a can?!? That could be LETHAL! It has TWO DRUGS, like a speedball.

  9. SecretShopper: pours out a lil' liquor for the homies Wasp & Otter says:

    four loko is for those times when only the best $2.50 can buy is good enough

  10. bigdirty says:

    I tried this once – not knowing exactly what it was, but knowing what Sparxx is, and thought, hell for $3, I’ll give it a shot, it looks interesting. I couldn’t even get past the first sip, all it is is bum wine. Absolutely terrible, and this comes from a man who willingly ingested a 24 ounce can of Budweiser Chileda.

    • c!tizen says:

      Normally I hate anything Budweiser, but I actually really like Chiledas for hangovers. It might have something to do with the fact that I’m still a little drunk, but hey… it works for me.

  11. segfault, registered cat offender says:

    I LOL’d, mostly because the guy in the video is a quiet drunk like me.

  12. MonkeyMonk says:

    I would rather drink straight vodka than a Four Loco. It tastes better at least.

  13. Oranges w/ Cheese says:

    My mom called me yesterday after drinking half of a Four Loko. I told her to pour it down the drain. She got mad at me :(

  14. Spook Man says:

    Rover’s Morning Glory in cleveland ( has a co-host Deiter which drank 3 on the radio and got crazy off this stuff.. I guess he ended up peeing his pants, etc and doesn’t remember much.. ha-ha..

  15. dourdan says:

    is it avalibe nation wide? i want one!

  16. thrashanddestroy says:

    Meh, I don’t get it. Sparks came out back in 2002 and nobody raised this kind of fuss. The stuff tasted more like piss than regular beer, I’m sure Four Loko isn’t any different.

    • hobochangbar says:

      I wouldn’t be surprised if this recent wave of media attention wasn’t “encouraged” by the makers themselves. What’s the best way to make kids want something? Get parents to hate it.

  17. samonela says:

    Let’s see…I’m no math major…

    23.5 ounces with 12% alcohol by volume = potentially over the legal limit in just one can for a 140-160 lbs male.

    Get some inexperienced teens thinking that they can drink 2+ cans to impress their dumb friends, and you have blackouts and regrettable actions galore.

    • samonela says:

      Forgot to mention:

      At least with regular ol’ booze, drinking that much alcohol (the equivalent amount to get you to .20+ territory) will inebriate you to the point that you will have trouble with the judgment, balance, and fine motor skills, necessary to make some stupid decisions….kinda hard to make some decisions if you can’t even stand up or stay conscious…

      However when you add the stimulants into the mix, not only do you have a wide awake drunk, but you also have one that subjectively feels that they are “not that drunk.”

    • Zachary Jacob Zblewski says:

      “A few teens” shouldn’t be drinking in the first place.

  18. Sparkstalker says:

    Just another demon of the week. Back when I was in school, it was the Liquid Crack:

  19. uxu says:

    This juice is now banned in Michigan –

  20. 4Real says:

    His dog is licking his lips that is a sign of nausea.. the dog cant stand his

  21. TacoDave says:

    I’ve drunk plenty of cans of Four Loko in the past year. I’m also 33 years old, so it wasn’t illegal.

    It may not taste “the best” (“It tastes just like Sunkist!”), but I don’t think it’s horrible either. I like to drink a can and play video games in my underwear.

  22. amgriffin says:

    I like how is eyes are slightly crossed at the end. The video should have included a portion of the next morning to really be complete.

  23. Promethean Sky says:

    This stuff is disgusting. However, as a Michigan (where it’s recently been banned) resident, I’m pissed that I’m not allowed to put this swill in my body. Yet, I could buy a million cigarettes if I were so inclined.

  24. Jane_Gage says:

    He did the Hitler ‘stashe while sober?

  25. Yoko Broke Up The Beatles says:

    So, I’ve never had Four Loko; is it better or worse than Steven Seagal’s Lightning Bolt?

  26. privax says:

    Better stock up or try one soon, the company just released a statement yesterday that they will be reforumulating their product and removing all of the “energy” ingredients.