SFX: Doorbell rings 3 times.
VERIZON: Good morning! Have you heard about THE FIBER?!
HOMEOWNER: I think I’m taken care of in that department.
VERIZON: But I’m talking about Verizon’s kind of fiber!
HOMEOWNER: And I’m talking Time Warner Cable. They’ve been using fiber optics for over a decade. Welcome to the program!
ANNOUNCER: Call 1-888 TWCABLE today and get roadrunner highspeed online and home phone service for as low as $29.95 each for the first 12 months.
HOMEOWNER: Ooh, you’re looking a little bunched up. Need some help?