I’ve always thought those Segway things were: a) ridden by douchebags, b) dangerous looking.

“No, no, no!” People told me, “It has a gyroscope! You can’t fall!”

Well, not forward anyway, but according to the CPSC you can be ejected off the back of the thing causing injuries to the “head and wrist.” Fantastic.

They’re issuing a recall of 23,000 Segways, (There are 23,000 of these stupid things out there?) including the Segway Golf Transporter, pictured here.

I’d like to protest the recall and repair of this particular model, because Segway Inc. might have inadvertently made golf interesting by increasing the threat of head injury. And, let’s face it, if there’s anything the world needs less of — it’s golfers.

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