Let’s Kick It To The Old School

Twenty-five years ago today, Sergeant Pepper taught the band to play. One year ago today in The Consumerist, uh, we didn’t exist yet. BUT several months ago, we had some cool posts. To pluck your heartstrings, here’s some sepia tinted Consumerist.

• June 13: Some girl’s awesome flameout resignation letter to American Apparel.
• February 6: Crossing swords with Nvidia over their employ of online shills to flog their products.
• Dec 14: To deal with customers complaining about long lines at the bank, NatWest removed all the clocks.
• Dec 22: Verizon bans the use of Christmas lights in Lonaconing, Maryland.
• OMG! Remember when everyone was talking about Sony rootkits? Yeah, that NEVER got old!
• Jan 23:Victoria’s Secret to Customers: “Your Breasts Are Too Large To Shop Here”


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    It has come to my attention recently that you have been failing to meet our daily posting quota. I understand that you may not always be able to find enough “blogobitching” and “ask metafilter” round-ups, but you HAVE to be able to find something.

    Need I remind you of the horrible fate that was awaiting Joel Johnson? Had he not so flippantly ignored our quota requirements he may not have met his untimely demise in the gawker gas chamber.

    We don’t want that, do we? DO WE?!

    Yes, I know the question is rhetorical but I expect you to telepathically answer me when I talk to you! I am Nick Denton, bitch! I’m the motherfucking Alpha and the Omega of my blog empire! I built my sovereignty brick by brick–

    Oh what’s this? I see a “Let’s Kick it to the old school” post. Excellent– I will defer your impending demise until a later date.

    Nick Denton
    AIM: GawkerOverlord

  2. Ben Popken says:

    Our Customer Advocacy Squad will get right on that for you.

  3. Victoria’s Secret to Customers: “Your Breasts Are Too Large To Shop Here”

    I didn’t know anyone actually complained about that.