King of Jews, King of Brews

He walked on water, He cured the festering and the blind, He turned water into wine. But after a hard day on the cross, even the King of Kings needed a frosty cold one. But two thousand years later, theologians still wrestle with a truly massive question: what would Jesus drink?

Well, according to a billboard in downtown Houston, Jesus was a Bud man. Some rogue street artists painted a picture of Jesus in their home and then, under the cover of darkness, pasted it over one side of a Budweiser billboard. Jesus is probably replacing a hirsute man’s man or a rugged cowboy, yet it’s somehow none less manly with J.C. tipping a frothy glass of sweet manna to the man upstairs.

Jesus beer billboard causing quite a stir [Raw Story]


Edit Your Comment

  1. Well. I for one busted out laughing. I can’t think of a witty remark yet, but it’s coming… gimme three days?

  2. RandomHookup says:

    Everybody knows Jesu was a wine man, though He could make a mean Tom Collins if He had to.

  3. Multisyllaballistic says:

    Jesus always struck me as more of a Labatt Blue kinda guy. It’s a much humbler beer.

  4. bambino says:

    Jesus would drink Mickey’s, no doubt. What else could he afford on an ancient carpenter’s wages?

  5. Paul D says:


    Fuck that shit!

    Pabst Blue Ribbon!

  6. Ben says:

    After a busy day of walking on American Beer, Heyzoos sat down and had himself a tall Guinness, laughing at the silly Romans and their wine coolers.

  7. ckilgore says:

    Hel-lo! Jesus brews his own in his basement.

  8. *points at Ben*
    You win.

  9. LTS! says:

    Why I would expect that the King of Jews would drink only He’Brew.

  10. Plasmafire says:

    I thought he only drank “water”.

  11. Hooray4Zoidberg says:

    If Jesus could make water into wine, wouldn’t he also turn that piss water beer into wine as well?

  12. ModerateSnark says:

    I believe Jesus enjoyed the extractions of the Pomegranate, for verily, it was the King of Juice.