Republican Says Farmers Markets Turn Into Crack Dens

Watch out! That local farmer’s market might be an insidious hotbed of liberal propaganda. That paper sack full of juicy tomatoes you buy might come with a freebie: a cogent argument in favor of homosexual marriage, or affirmative action, or against the occupation of Iraq!

Or so the tiresome chairman of the Lane County Republican Party is claiming out in Oregon.

    Bob Avery said Monday that he is opposing the market “as a resident of Junction City” and not in his official capacity as the county’s GOP chairman. But he said the latter role probably made him “more sensitive” to the political roots of SOD (Seeking Out Democracy), the group seeking a permit to operate the open-air market. And, while he has no plans to target established events such as Eugene’s Saturday Market and the Lane County Farmers Market, Avery said, he’s “alerted people in the party to be on the lookout for this kind of (political) activity around the county.”

He has some other reasons why you shouldn’t be able to buy succulent pears or ripe cheeses directly from a local farmer. A big one? A farmer’s market is the first step towards turning the neighborhood into a crack alley. Everyone hold on tight: once the compression of a person’s intellect due to political zealotry reaches a certain point, there’s a significant chance of a black hole imploding into existence within his cerebellum.

Application for farmers’ market draws fire [Register Guard Online]