Who Will Monitor the Dell Monitors?

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Which came first, the cock or the bull? Which came first, the ineptitude or the incompetence? All valid questions to ask oneself, and the universe, when calling Dell tech support.

Wes needed to replace his monitor, but tech support wanted the “Dell Express Code” written on the computer. But he didn’t buy a computer, he only had the monitor. Thank you sir, they said, would you please then read the express code written on the computer?

Wes’s story after the jump is just further proof why deconstructionism shouldn’t just be a literary theory, but a lifestyle choice for navigating modern society…

Wes writes:

    I recently had a technical problem with one of the widescreen flat-panel monitirs Dell has been selling. It took about 10 minutes of hunting around to find a number to call, then after calling it, the automated system had me stuck. I didn’t have an mp3 player, projector, TV, printer, or a computer system. I just had a monitor. Not a Dell computer.

    I hit system after giving up on finding a “monitor-only” option. Spoke with a person, was transferred, spoke with another person, was transferred, and spoke with a third person. We went through the usual troubleshooting and (surprise) my monitor needed to be replaced. He asked me (for the fourth time in the call) to give him my Dell Express Service code. I told him I didn’t have one on the monitor. He said he knew and to tell him the one on my computer. I told him that I didn’t purchase a Dell computer (this happened honestly four times). The fourth time, I gave in and read off an express service code from a Dell computer I had in my closet from 2000. He thanked me and we continued on. He later said that he wasn’t able to progress through the computer system to issue a return until the computer’s express service code was entered. For a monitor return. Dell is wanting to sell their monitors I’m sure.

    But heaven forbid you didn’t get a desktop with it.


Well it all would’ve been alright if you hadn’t broke your monitor, now wouldn’t it Wes? Maybe you’ll think a little harder next time before treating your toys so poorly?

Or maybe he’ll just think harder next time before buying from Dell.


Edit Your Comment

  1. Paul D says:

    Dude, you’re gettin’ the runaround!

  2. drsmith says:

    Had a similar experience with buying an adapter from dell. I wanted to buy an internal part as a private customer(not as a business), so I went through their support lines for lowly, unimportant consumers. After an hour of arguing that they were trying to sell me the wrong part, I asked to be transferred to enterprise systems support. From enterprise support, I got the part number for the adapter. With that in hand, I transferred back to the idiot support line so I could buy my parts with a personal credit card.

    That was the day I decided to get rid of my stock in Dell. You can’t treat customers like that and expect to grow as a company.

  3. Bubba Barney says:

    Anyone else kinda miss the Dell dude?

  4. Ben Sherman says:

    Same situation here. I had a DVI cable go bad. I work for a company who has about 500 orders with dell, and some of them are monitors.

    When the DVI cable went bad, I called them and went through the same. damn. thing. This particular monitor was not attached to a Dell. I too gave an express serivce code from a random machine when confronted with this question. And I too was told the monitor was not attached to the system.

    She offered to look it up by order number, and I told her I didn’t have that.

    “Can we look it up by serial number?” I said.

    No. Express service code or order number only. She chastised me for not having it. I asked if she had my orders, and she said, “yes, but theres more than 500 of them, why don’t you have it?” My eyebals fell out and my shoes fell off and I turned into a ball of shivering goo.

    Finally after going through this for 1/2 an hour, she told me she would send me a new cable. I told her, a DVI cable. “A what?” A cable for the monitor. “Ok,” she says.

    Another 1/2 hour for her to try to find the part. I told her to please continue to look, I had other important things to work on. Call me back with an order number when you find it.

    “A DVI cable. The thing that connects the monitor to the computer. The WHITE ENDED ONE.”

    I got a call back on my voicemail hours later with an order number.

    2 days later, DHL came to me.. with.. a.. power cable.

    This was their premium business support too.