Hell Hath no Fury Like a Dell Scorned

Wow, this is positively gaytarded. But before you bust out your effete stilettos to slit our fingers over such a egregiously offensive remark, hear us out. We believe you’ll find its usage warranted.

Kate bought two desktops from Dell and also asked for “something to link them.” Dell supplied the computers… and a server.

After speaking to a more tech savvy friend, she learned all she really needed was a cable. Her company has only two employees. When she asked Dell for a refund, they refused. Last week, a Dell “EMEA customer relations executive” sent her this email:

    “We have followed up internally by checking our records, and have discussed this matter with the sales person concerned.”

You know it only gets better after that… after the jump…

    “It is our understanding that the sales conversation was clear, and full and included a discussion about providing a solution that would allow for system growth in future. The solution proposed therefore seems to have been a reasonable one, and the purchase seemed to be an informed one, so we see no reason to cancel the order.

    “We regret that your experience seems not to have been positive, and we respect your right to pursue this matter further.

    Our position remains as stated above.”>

That position would be known as “top,” as in “bending you over the desk and slapping your flank while you scream Daddy! Daddy!”

Dell Stands by Server Order [The Register] (Thanks to Joel!)


Edit Your Comment

  1. konstantConsumer says:

    ahh, but you see, this situation is decidedly bad, while bending me over the desk and slapping my flank while i scream Daddy! Daddy! would be hot. therefore, this situation is definitely not gay. just stupid. however, if anyone wants to take up the afore mentioned action with me, let me know, because it sounds totally gay and hot!

  2. Bubba Barney says:

    I’m there. Who knew the Consumerist would be a place to get action?

  3. Ben Popken says:

    Look for our forthcoming investigative report: Consumerist’s guide to the nation’s best glory holes.

  4. non-meat-stick says:

    so am I on top as I’m bent over? Sure, that sounds hot…

  5. AcidReign says:

    …..Whew! Sounds like that scene in “The Secretary!” But you can get reamed over a desk without having to buy a server…

    …..And my god! Can you imagine this person who doesn’t know what an ethernet crossover cable is, trying to configure Windows 2003 Server? Dell used to have the edge in service, but no longer.

  6. Amys Robot says:

    Gaytarded? Who writes this stuff? Morgan Spurlock?


  7. madderhatter says:

    Considering that 99% of our computers (thousands) and servers (thousands) are bought from Dell (State Gov’t) I’d really like to see them try and pull that crap if we wanted to return something. Usually if we even look at them with a raised eyebrow over the phone they are overnighting this and that and have RMA numbers drooling out of their mouth.

    Kate, if you read this fire me off an e-mail at my username @ gmail.com and I’ll at least try to help.

  8. Michael A. B. says:

    Well, I hate to say this… Strike that. I love to say this. It is my thinking that, this person got exactly what they deserved here. He gave someone with no technical expertise the task of purchasing hardware with only very general specifications. I would not give a refund to him either.

    It is like asking your barber for a vasectomy.

    He may know how to use a pair, but don’t ask for him to do anything that technical with them. (The scissors I mean.)

    It is managers asking people to do exactly this kind of unqualified decision making that probably caused the policy in the first place. If my boss told me to buy something, I would get the right thing. A little initiative goes a long way.

    And don’t say that it is difficult to know in today’s world. I don’t think anyone reading this would not be able to pick up the phone and call at least 5 people who could tell them what to get. 6 if you include yourself. If someone got sold a server, it sounds like they bought it by mistake and now the boss is pissed.

    Should have done a bit of CYA up front.

    Remember, an informed consumer is a happy consumer. An uninformed consumer is, well, probably most of them.

  9. drsmith says:

    The line, “After speaking to a more tech savvy friend” makes it sound like she didn’t investigate the matter until well after she had received the server. At that point in the game, the requisition and at least the price should have given her the notion that something was very wrong.

    You can return a server if you haven’t set it up and used it for a month. I wouldn’t expect to return something after that, however.

  10. ryansfall says:

    Your disclaimer doesn’t make using gaytarded any less idiotic.

  11. L_Emmerdeur says:

    1. Do your own research.
    2. Ask an expert who isn’t actually selling to you. Asking a Dell salesperson to help you decide what you need will get you a $10,000 quad-SLI gaming rig to check your email.

    0/10. (Luckily, you guys rarely disappoint, so this post is, in fact, a treat in disguise)