Who is The Consumerist?

As we so often do, The Consumerist was gazing in the mirror this morning and wondering “who are we?” and “why are we here?” and “what is that strange growth?

Who is The Consumerist? Some might have you believe it’s the man at left. They would be wrong as that man’s body parts are scattered in suitcases in the woods of five different states.

Wikipedia tells us “Popular media used “Consumerist” as a short-form for “Consumer-Activist.” Well that certainly doesn’t solve our existential crisis.

Thankfully, there’s dictionary.com. We typed in “consumerist.” The definition gets redirected to consumerism:

    “The movement seeking to protect and inform consumers by requiring such practices as honest packaging and advertising, product guarantees, and improved safety standards.”

Aight, we can get jiggy with that definition. Though, it’s generous; we wouldn’t go so far to say “movement.” At least not yet.

A secondary concern not covered in any of these dictionaries is checking other consumer’s behavior, into the sidelines if necessary. It’s not just companies, stupid shoppers are part of the problem. They make everyone look bad and abet scurrilous corporate activities.

And while we can’t actually require companies to play safe with or inform consumers, we can and will certainly make fun of them when they don’t. Which is just a fancy way of saying we get consumeristic on their asses.