[Full disclosure: I bought the N95 the day it came out in the U.S., so I'm not pretending to be immune to gadget lust. On the plus side, there were only, like, six customers in the Nokia store at the time.]

"Are some lives so empty that an iPhone 3G will fill the void?" [Wisebread] (Thanks to Chris!)

[via CNET]

RELATED: Who would wait a week in line for an iPhone 3G? [Fortune]

The secret, apparently, is to make every third or fourth yes mean something entirely new through the magic of inflection—but you'll have to stay committed to it even when the telemarketer catches on, which may result in a self-inflicted insult.

"How to torment telemarketers with one word" [YouTube via Neatorama]

Inflating Home Appraisals: Buyers could borrow enough to cover closing costs, but ended up owing more than the house is worth.

Flipping Loans: Moving unqualified buyers to loans that don't require documentation, knowing they couldn't afford it

Coaching: Brokers told buyers to overstate or even double their stated income in order to qualify for loans.

Watch the clip, inside...

[via Today Show]

My wife let out a full-throated scream that I've only really heard in my nightmares when she is being carried off by a giant squid or something and both of my legs have been cut off and I can't help her...she bent over, her trembling hands on her knees and spit out what was in her mouth onto the floor...my wife's box of Goobers was ALIVE and crawling with maggots...I peered inside the box and saw lumpen, misshapen Goobers with maggots or some kind of larvae crawling everywhere.

Naturally, the blogger took a video, available in all its disgusting glory, inside...

Nestle's Maggoty Goobers [SAVANNAH RED] (Thanks to Rob Walker!)

PedEgg Accused Of Gross Injustice [The Smoking Gun]

Shrinking packaging costing you more [Fox 13]

Basically, what we learned from the video is that this stuff might be ok if you're drunk which could probably be said for a great number of things. We are anxious to see how Pepsi will torture Japan's taste-buds next year.

Pepsi Blue Hawaii [HikanNinja]

The article says,

The clip, which has been viewed more than two million times, shows 25-year-old Lauren Bernat hula hooping in time with the fitness video game.

Rumours that the clip was a clever marketing ploy for the Wii Fit spread after it emerged that both Miss Bernat and her boyfriend, who filmed the footage, work in advertising.

Giovanny Gutierrez, 30, works as director of interactive media for Tinsley Advertising in Miami, Florida. According to his biography on the firm’s website, he "creates web, e-mail and interactive marketing solutions that perfectly integrate with television, radio and print campaigns."

"Gio is a master of e-commerce, having created web portals for scores of businesses," the biography adds.

Miss Bernat works as an account executive at Tinsley Advertising, where her duties include "evaluating the responses to our Internet advertising".

But Nintendo has denied that the footage is part of an advertising campaign. "This has and is absolutely 100 per cent nothing to do with Nintendo," a spokesman said. "Nintendo did not create it and were not aware of it until it was brought it to our attention."

Mr Gutierrez has also denied that it was a viral advert for the Wii Fit.

The game, which allows Nintendo Wii owners to do a range of exercises and stretches under the guidance of on on-screen fitness expert, hardly needs the free publicity, having sold more than 300,000 copies in the UK in its first two weeks on sale, and sold out in many parts of the world.

But the YouTube affair has done much to boost the profile of Mr Gutierrez and his agency.

The evidence that this is an organized marketing campaign seems circumstantial to us. However, advertisers are always coming up with new ways to turn attention toward new products so who knows? We'll just have to keep watching the video until we figure it out.

Wii Fit underwear girl: A marketing hoax? [The Telegraph]

Envelope System Video Tutorial (Step By Step Guide To Using The Envelope System To Manage Your Cash) [No Credit Needed]

RELATED: Dave Ramsey's Envelope System [Dave Ramsey]

New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less[The Onion]

(Thanks to Clokeisgod!)

At approximately 30 seconds in:

Most people seem to consider the effects of subliminal advertising negligible at best. For one thing, the guy "discovered" it actually made the whole thing up as a gimmick to get more business for his marketing research company. However, according to Wikipedia, "A study conducted by the United Nations concluded that "the cultural implications of subliminal indoctrination is a major threat to human rights throughout the world." Do you think there is a threat? Could it be possible?

Here is the live audio and powerpoint from a recent presentation I gave called, "The 5 Things Your Customers Aren't Telling You." This is number 3, "Stop Hiding Behind Walls Of Robots." It's all about how companies think they're saving money by replacing humans with machines but sometimes machines can't do jobs as well as humans, especially when it comes to customer service. I brought the point to life with a funny little story about eBay and their wonderfully inept automated email response system. I hope you enjoy the video, including the intro and outro ditties I worked up on my girlfriend's old Yamaha synth.

(Photo: Tubes.)

Hi, I just read your article about Hollywood Video's policies and most of it is flat out not true.  It sounds like whoever wrote in initially has a particularly evil district manager who is instituting his own policies.

1. Store level employees covering at other stores: This is pretty much retail chain standard, especially in chains with a small number of employees per store.  Hollywood video will reimburse mileage, you just need to fill out a form.  As far as write ups for refusing, must just be that district, it's not policy.  

2. As far as the quotas go, yes and no.  At hire all employees are told that offering these things are "must see behaviors".  They can, and will, fire you for not offering.  There are quotas for Playguard percentage (somewhere in the range of 1.5% for employees, and 5% total for the store, off the top of my head), though employees can't be fired simply for failing to meet the number.  (You can't /make/ people buy stuff)  Store Managers /can/ be fired if their store fails to meet the target two periods in a row.  

3. There is no policy that prevents employees from telling people the money from Playguard does not go to charity.  I will admit it is pretty shady to just stop donating the money however.  

4. Employees can't remove late fees?  Weird, I did it this morning. This may be a policy local to a district if it was getting out of hand.  My best guess anyway.  

5. After 12 days the late fee does go to a separate screen, this has been true for a long time.  It's not to frustrate and confuse people however, and employees see both screens when an account gets pulled up, so if a customer is confused it's solely the fault of an incompetent employee.  The reason for the two screens is that after twelve days, only the store manager (or assistant) can remove or alter the late fee (IE you better have a good reason for being so late).  

6. Receipts don't print for cash transactions that only have rentals or concessions on them.  This is just to save paper.  An employee can print one if it's asked for.  

7. The EW thing never went away, they just stopped requiring employees to push it.  They're actively promoting it again. There's no "silence is acceptance" however, and we need to scan your credit card (an additional time) to activate the offer.

The conditions described by the previous tipster must be local, because I don't deal with anything like it.  I'd advise he go over his DM and talk to someone at corporate.

RELATED
"Is Hollywood Video Bringing Back "Silence Is Acceptance" Magazine Subscriptions?"
(Photo: Sister72)

What's so poignant about this time is the uncertainty. When you get to Blockbuster are they going to have your video? Did someone else rent it? Is there going to be a line? Are the alarms going to sound when you walk out the front door? It was very difficult for the people that lived during this era.

Difficult indeed.

Historic ‘Blockbuster’ Store Offers Glimpse Of How Movies Were Rented In The Past [The Onion]

Shame, Shame, Shame: Incident at Walgreens [FOX] (Thanks to Robert!)

I guess Mo Rocca saw how good John Hodgman did with that whole Apple gig and decided to get a piece of the action himself and hook up with a major corporation for some funny videos. Unfortunately, no one seemed to warn Mo that Bank of America is a little different than Apple. Namely in that people hate Bank of America. Apple: shiny. Bank of America: vile cesspool. Mo seems like a pretty smart guy, so I hope at least he's putting his whore dollars in a credit union. Or at least somewhere better than Bank of America. A pile of dirty socks would suffice.

Mo Rocca On Banking [Official Site]

"When I saw it, I was shocked," said Milfs. She was so offended by the books that she prepared a complaint to her state representative and to other organizations such as Morality in Media, Concerned Women of America and the American Family Association.

Milfs contacted Urban Outfitter's corporate office. "They said they are not sex books or pornography books, but that they are art books and their goals are to support the artists," Milfs said. Urban Outfitters has not made any official comment.

To protect children from sexually explicit content, many states have laws that limit children's access to any material that lacks "serious, artistic, political, scientific or literary value," said Robert Peters, president of Morality in Media, a group established to fight pornography. "The vagueness of the state law creates a legal gray area," according to Peters. "Arguably, an item that is inappropriate for children might be allowable if it's found suitable for adults."

According to Milfs, "It's not freedom of speech. It's selling adult books to teenagers." Whether or not a book such as this qualifies as "adult" is subjective to each adult individual, and just because a book has the word "porn" in its title, doesn't mean it's pornography. While we certainly agree that Milfs has the right to raise her child in a porn-free environment, we're just not convinced that paper genitalia qualifies as porn, however, your mileage may vary.

Mom appalled at racy books in store for teens at Alderwood mall [The Herald]

Dear Consumerist,

To my surprise, my 2002 Toyota RAV4 vehicle was stolen last night. I thought I always have a peace of mind when it comes to the security of my vehicle. I don't think this is one of the most stolen vehicles, and my vehicle wasn't kept exceptionally well with dents behind the vehicle. I have LoJack installed and Unbreakable Autolock model#1740.

My father woke up at 3am and just happened to peek outside the window and discovered our vehicle was missing from our driveway. The truth is everything is breakable in less than a minute even the so called Unbreakable Autolock. I doubt I will ever get $5000 dollars as they claimed when your vehicle was stolen. Here is a video from Youtube, sounds like a kid showing you how to pick a $60 lock in less than a minute.

Thanks,
Alan

We're sorry to hear about your loss, Alan. We would certainly hope that you are a candidate for Autolock's $5000 guarantee. Autolock's website doesn't reveal any details about their guarantee but we suspect there are a sea of loopholes that prevent the company from making frequent pay-outs. We'll keep our fingers crossed that your LoJack produces results in the coming days. Let's put it out to the Consumerists: What, if any, are the best vehicle security devices on the market?

In another advertisement a man in a lab coat says, "Getting the Vitamin D you need has never been easier. To get you 4000 IU, it takes 20 cans of sardines - Mmm good - or 40 glasses of milk, if you tolerate lactose. Better yet, get a full 4000 IU of Vitamin D in just five minutes in a tanning bed at Darque Tan." Darque Tan seems to want us to believe we would drop dead from a Vitamin D deficiency unless we nourish our bodies with their life giving tanning beds.

Prewett is concerned because the ads portray tanning as a health benefit with no risks. "I don't have an issue with the company, I just have in issue with that particular advertising campaign," said Prewett. "I think that's the wrong message to be sending potential customers. And it's prohibited for a reason, and it's because there are so many health studies that link cancer and other risks to UV exposure."

Prewett's is not the first complaint lodged against Darque Tan's advertising campaign. In fact, Darque Tan's health claims are in clear violation of Texas' health and safety code which states, "A tanning facility operator may not claim or distribute promotional materials that claim using a tanning device is safe or free from risk or that using a tanning device will result in medical or health benefits." Doug McBride of Texas Department of State Health Services said, "They cannot make that claim legally. They cannot make any health claim."

There is little doubt that prolonged UV exposure carries significant risks whether it be from the sun or tanning beds. We agree with Emily that these advertisements are composed of 1 part fact per one hundred parts fiction. With tanning or any product it is irresponsible and dangerous to circulate advertisements that exaggerate or invent health benefits and ignore all of the health risks. Obviously advertisements are going to be biased but there has to be a line that should not be crossed to help up us stay safe. We tip our sun visors to you, Emily.

Darque Tan ads elicit complaint from law student [The Daily Texan] (Thanks to Brad for sending this in!)

(Thanks to Waldon!)

Here's how it works: you drop your package off at a participating station, Amtrak ships it off, and the recipient picks it up in the destination city.

Because Amtrak always has to futz something up, express shipping isn't offered out of Penn Station, but New Yorkers can still receive packages "(or human remains.)"

Save With Dave: Amtrak Shipping [CBS 13]
Amtrak Express Shipping [Amtrak]
(Photo: reivax)

(Photo: Mary Catherine O'Connor)

UPDATE: Brian says the tech said the root problem was frayed and rubbing wires.

PREVIOUSLY: All The Dashboard Lights Flash Whenever I Drive My Dodge Charger In The Rain

Tricks of the trade [Dateline via AllFinancialMatters]

Now the videos are available to anyone who wants to see them —for a price. Lawyers, reporters, activists and journalists are lining up at the production company's tiny new office, cash in hand.

From the WSJ:

They sold their 20,000-square-foot production facility and moved into an 800-square-foot rented office. They now hope to sustain the company by selling access to the Wal-Mart videos. They charge $250 an hour for video research, and additional fees for a DVD copy of film clips.

Plaintiffs attorney Diane M. Breneman stumbled across the videos while working on a lawsuit she filed in 2005, on behalf of a 12-year-old boy, against Wal-Mart and the manufacturer of a plastic gasoline can sold in its stores. Her client was injured when he poured gasoline from the container onto a pile of wet wood he had been trying to light, and the can exploded. The lawsuit alleges that the containers are unsafe because they don't contain a device that prevents flames from jumping up the spout and exploding.

Wal-Mart's lawyers have argued in court filings that the retailer couldn't have known that the product "presented any reasonable foreseeable risk...in the normal and expected use."

Ms. Breneman says that when she first laid eyes on the racks of tapes, "I thought, 'How could anyone in the world allow this to exist?'" The videos, she says, deal with "everything anyone would want on Wal-Mart....They've got 30 years of people winging it."

Ms. Breneman says Flagler Productions located videos of product presentations to Wal-Mart managers in which executives gave parody testimonials about the same brand of gasoline can. In an apparent coincidence, one manager joked about setting fire to wet wood: "I torched it. Boom! Fired right up." In a separate skit, an employee is seen driving a riding lawn mower into a display of empty gasoline cans. A Wal-Mart executive vice president observing the collision jokes: "A great gas can. It didn't explode." The tapes were made before the lawsuit was filed.

The video company says it offered to sell the tapes to Walmart for several million dollars, but the retailer would pay only $500,000, saying that the "footage wouldn't be of interest elsewhere."

Candid Camera: Trove of Videos Vexes Wal-Mart [WSJ]
(Photo:Clean Wal-mart)

GUY: It's true. When I first saw her, I was like, Bam! True love can be bought on the internet! It's so simple.

GIRL: Before I use to worry and thought, maybe my standards were too high.

GUY: Or too low.

GIRL: But then we learned to let a computer set the standard for us, and here we are.

GUY: And it's careful, too! I mean, if she can fill out a 10 million survey question form, she can't be a total ax- wielding maniac, right?

GIRL: Being careful is important, because I have genital herpes.

GUY: And I don't. Wait, you genital herpes? Good thing I'm gay! Phew, dodged a bullet there.

DR: Remember, true love is something special and can't be added to a shopping cart. Join us online today and take our compatibility exam. But please remember to use a condom. Settling for less has never been so easy. Log on today.

Here's what he wrote:

Well, after I had blown through my 5 free in-store exchanges by mid-March (on the bottom of your Blockbuster receipt it tracks how many in-store exchanges you've done this month), I decided to see what happens if I go in and try a get 6th in-store exchange. Well, as to be presumed, I didn't get a free exchange, but the online movie did serve as a $3.00 coupon off the price of the rental ($4.99 movie), which just further confused me. Apparently, buried in their FAQs it says "If the pre-determined number of free in-store exchanges is met during the calendar month, you have the ability to exchange your Online DVDs for discounted movie rentals for the remainder of the month." The bummer is it doesn't mention how much of a discount it is. For a .99 rental, is there even a discount?

In the process of trying to figure out the limits of the system, I realized that different Blockbuster stores are keeping track of the in-store exchanges separately. Yes, that's right. After getting my free 5 in-store exchanges at one store, I simply took my next 5 online movies to another nearby Blockbuster and was able to get another 5 in-store exchanges during the same month.

Blockbuster tracks whether individuals are abusing their online subscription plan and "gaming" the system to exceed the number of in-store exchanges they are allowed per month.

If an online subscriber tries to circumvent the terms of their plan, and in this instance gain more free rentals than allowed, we'll know and ask them to stop if they want to remain an online subscriber, just as we're doing with Kevin.

Blockbuster Total Access Extra Movie Hack? [Hacking Netflix]
Blockbuster Warns Against "Gaming the System" [Hacking Netflix]
(Photo: Knowzy) (Thanks to Jeff!)

To test, Consumer Reports takes glasses coated with a mixture of flour, egg yolk, sugar, and evaporated milk then puts it in an oven for ten minutes in order to simulate baked-on food. After the glass cools, testers place it in a scrubbing machine with warm water and one teaspoon of detergent. A counter then tallies the number of scrubs it takes to remove the food. Steel panels are dipped in beef fat and left to dry to test for grease removal.

Which dishwashing detergent works best? [ABC 7]
PREVIOUSLY: Inside The Consumer Reports Testing Facility

Video inside.

Note: Anyone ranting off-topic in the comments about how Nader threw the election may get a visit from *~El Bandito~*

• Be open and friendly in your discussion with the salesperson, ask for them to "work with you" on the price
• Be discreet, don't broadcast to other shoppers that you're getting a deal
• Escalate to a manager if the salesperson isn't empowered to make a decision
• Do your research so you know the fair price to ask for
• Be creative, ask for free shipping
• Offer to pay cash so they don't have to pay a credit card transaction fee

[via Boing Boing]