#FreeEmily

Woman Spends Harrowing 45 Minutes Locked Inside Department Store, Live-Tweets The Experience

When you try to leave a store only to discover that you’ve been locked inside and no one is around to help, many thoughts may cross your mind. “I’ve got to tweet this” probably won’t be one of them, but you’re not the Canadian writer who spent a harrowing 45 minutes or so locked inside a Hudson’s Bay store in Toronto. [More]

Video: Guy Has Epic Meltdown At Mall Doors Because He Can't Shop During G20 Protests

Video: Guy Has Epic Meltdown At Mall Doors Because He Can't Shop During G20 Protests

Passions ran hot during the recent G20 summit and inevitable protests in Toronto. Riot police tromped, windows were smashed, monetary policy was set, and this would-be consumer screamed at the locked doors of the mall for a good two minutes demanding to be let in so he could exercise his inalienable right to shop and really show those capitalist pigs what for. [More]

This Pizza Pizza Slice Came With A Free Tube Of Vaseline

This Pizza Pizza Slice Came With A Free Tube Of Vaseline

Torontoist reader Charles claims to have received a used tube of Vaseline with his bagged slice of vegetarian pizza. He wrote:

Yes, this is how the slice came: a used and soiled “Convenience Size” bottle of Vaseline moisturizer, as found in a Pizza Pizza, bagged slice of pizza; purchased in-store at 8:30PM (EST) 23 February 2008, Yonge St near Bloor St (Toronto, Canada).

More Footage Of Scuzzy Optician Attacking Reporter

The power of submitting complaints to investigative reporters. Sometimes the journalist will gadfly the offender into making a complete ass of himself on international television. — BEN POPKEN

VIDEO: Counterfeit Glasses Dealer Attacks Reporter And Throws Snowballs

First Adam Plimer opens the door really quickly, hitting 75-year-old investigative reporter Peter Silverman in the head. Plimer screams, “Oh, I’m sorry, did I hit you?” Silverman puts his dukes up. Plimer dares Silverman to hit him in the face and shouts, “Go on, get the fuck out of here, I’m sick of you.” Seeing Plimer’s violence, Silverman tries to keep him in the store. Plimer breaks out and throws snowballs at the camera crew and a TCC inspector, yelling, “Get the fuck out of here.” The cops arrive. Plimer opens the door to shout the same obscenities at them. Then a sort of Canadian SWAT team arrives in riot gear. Eventually, they arrest Plimer.

UPDATE: A Long Con Doesn’t Go Very Far

UPDATE: A Long Con Doesn’t Go Very Far

Last week we reported on US Energy doing a little hit and run salesmanship of their natural gas delivery service.

Donkey’s Bum Makes for a Good Ad

Donkey’s Bum Makes for a Good Ad

Fantastic pack of commercials for “The World of Comedy International Film Festival.” Perfectly satirizes film festival preening, wherein artsy reporters intensely interview the makers of an a slapstick comedy as if they were auteurs.