toilet-paper

Testing For The Best Toilet Paper For Treating Your Tushie Right
Let's face it. using the right brand of toilet paper for most people is a matter of personal choice. But did you know that there's a whole slew of tests that experts use to evaluate TP? After all, you've got to treat your delicate parts right. More »

Lack Of Toilet Paper Leads Angry Hotel Guest To Do $2090 Worth Of Damage
When you have a problem with something missing from your hotel room, there are usually better ways to channel your frustration than by going on a rampage that results in more than $2,000 in damage. More »

Toilet Paper-Plagued Idaho River Finally Flushed Clean
An Idaho truck mishap that left a river clogged with massive rolls of disintegrating, unprocessed toilet paper has finally been cleaned up after weeks of efforts by clean-up crews. The upper Lochsa River was clogged with the waste, foiling sanitation efforts until recently. More »

Why Is The Quilted Northern Tube Wider But The Square Footage The Same?
Here's a conundrum. Reader Jim bought a new 12-pack of Quilted Northern Three-Ply and noticed that the diameter of the cardboard tube inside was about a quarter of an inch larger than his old roll. Both packages said they contained 266.6 square feet of booty-wiping tissue and the total thickness of the rolls was the same. So what's going on? Are these simply a more efficient — however you wish to definite it — version of TP? Inquiring minds want to know.

Scott Rolls Out Tube-Free Toilet Paper To Reduce Waste
The toilet paper business is going down the drain — literally. Starting this week, Kimberly-Clark has begun selling Scott Naturals Tube-Free toilet paper that won't have you throwing out or recycling anything when the roll is finished. More »

Grocery Shrink Ray Zaps Scott Toilet Paper
While watching his kids play around with less-than-sanitary but delightfully inexpensive empty toilet paper rolls, Art discovered the height of the newer rolls had shrunk. This is definitely the work of the dreaded Grocery Shrink Ray. More »

Should College Students In Dorms Have To Buy Their Own Toilet Paper?
Often, one of the perks of living in a dorm at college is the housekeeping, which dumps the trash, hoses down the bathroom and refills depleted toilet paper rolls in the stalls. But at Texas A&M, students in dorms may soon be responsible for having to supply their own TP. More »

Quilted Northern Justifies Shrinking Its TP

—>Ed wrote to Georgia-Pacific about its grocery shrink ray zapping of Quilted Northern toilet paper. The company consoles Ed and all his fellow wipers by saying the sheet count is only "slightly reduced:"  More »

Northern Hopes You Don't Notice Your Shrinking Toilet Paper

—>Many readers have reported the Grocery Shrink Ray strike on Northern toilet paper, but today Jack and Richard sent us photographic evidence, and even calculations of exactly how much paper consumers are losing out on.  More »

Comfort Wipe: For When You Just Can't Wipe Yourself Anymore

—>Do you need help wiping your own behind? Do you just not like touching toilet paper, and want a plastic device to do it for you? It's a good thing that you live in 21st-century America, because the Comfort Wipe is here to help you.  More »

How Badass Is Your Butt-Wipe? Consumer Reports Tests Toilet Paper

The "Wet Strike" test, seen in this video, is one of the ways Consumer Reports tests toilet paper. They stretch the paper over a beaker, wet it, and then dribble lead pellets onto it from a funnel. The paper that holds the most pellets is the strongest. Neat! Results will be unveiled in the May issue.  More »

Consumer Hero Investigates Toilet Paper "Sheet Shorting" Conspiracy

—>Leo Hill figures that every single roll of toilet paper he's bought since 2006 has shorted him at least one "sitting," says the Denver Post.  More »

Wipe Your Butt With Designer Toilet Paper By Renova

—>Renova is selling the first "fashionable" toilet paper, available in four designer colors: Black, Red, Orange, and Green. Their catalog copy reads, "A voluptuous texture. Colors for an outstanding style. A warm mystery in every single olfactive moment. Soft and glamorous...A paper full of pleasure."   More »

Kmart Loses Toilet Paper Tax Lawsuit

—>Mary Bach, the woman who sued Kmart for charging tax on toilet paper, has won her lawsuit and $100. Kmart offered to settle with Bach, but she declined.   More »

K-Mart Illegally Taxes Toilet Paper

—>A Pennsylvania K-Mart levied an illegal $0.28 tax on Mary Bach's $3.99 12-pack of Angel Soft toilet paper. Pennsylvania's sales tax guide clearly states that toilet paper is a non-taxable item. Mary first spoke with a cashier after noticing the illegal charge. When K-Mart again charged her the tax on a second visit, she decided to sue.  More »

Charmin Rolls Out Shorter Ultra Big Rolls

—>Charmin Ultra Big Rolls have shrunk by 1 centimeter, but don't expect the price to drop anytime soon. The discoverer of the change has an interesting take on the smaller Ultra Big rolls:

The fabulous news here, obviously, is that America's collective butt is getting smaller, and the folks at Proctor & Gamble are merely keeping pace. They've narrowed the width of Charmin, the veritable Rolls Royce of Toilet Paper, purely in response to our nation's decreasing posteriors.  More »

Scott Toilet Paper: Wipe With Less!

—>We don't know how lucky we have it.   More »

AdRants: Haltime Flush, PETA's Milk Gone Wild, Nail-Biting Bag

—>Ad Rants is a wealth of good stories today, so plucking out just one would be too easy. Our first inclination tilted inevitably towards the puerile, prompted by the strange decision by Scott Toilet Paper to promote the 'Halftime Flush.'  More »