“Who would have thought, after 30 years, that we’d be a flying 7-Eleven,” Becky Gilbert, a three-decade veteran of the industry told me during a break in our training session in Fort Worth.

The author, Michelle Higgins, captures the dramatic shift from what was once a career loaded with perks—free travel, flexible schedules, plenty of time off, and even a bit of cachet—into a job that puts you on the front line of the war most airlines are carrying out against their paying customers.

At the start of one flight, for example, the crew is told the plane is moving to a shorter runway, and they have to carry out a quick count of the number of children on board to see whether the plane meets the suddenly-reduced weight limit—otherwise they will have to kick off passengers. (And those passengers will hopefully write to The Consumerist.)

We've no doubt that there are bad employees in the skies—the bigots, morons, burn-outs, and despots who provide us with so many infuriating stories—but it's revealing to see the level of stress that today's good flight attendants have to deal with, and something worth keeping in mind the next time you fly and want to reach out and hurt the person telling you there are no more blankets or cookies, or that you'll almost certainly miss your connecting flight.

"Flying the Unfriendly Skies" [New York Times]
(Photo: FaceMePLS)

Earlier today, there was a run on shares of United Airlines' parent company, UAL, following news that the company was filing for bankruptcy. Unfortunately, that news was six years old. Somehow it was republished over the weekend by a Tribune news company without the original dateline, and by the time trading was halted at 12:30pm today, the stock had dropped from $12.30 to $3. The newspapers are still trying to figure out what happened.

According to news aggregation site SmartBrief.com, the South Florida Sun-Sentinel, a Tribune paper, was the first to run the old story about United. It was posted to its Web site at roughly 1 p.m. Sunday.

Sun-Sentinel Online Editor Joe Schwerdt pulled the story off his site shortly before noon this morning, in response to a call Tribune made to Sun-Sentinel editor Earl Maucker.

"I literally just got word a couple minutes ago that there was problem," says Schwerdt. He says he did not know how the old story was posted as new and was unsure if any other Tribune papers ran it. He declined to discuss details about how his paper publishes stories on weekends.

As of the publish date of this post, shares were back up to $10.92, noticeably lower than where they were trading before the news mix-up. Oops.

"How A Botched Web Story Wiped Out UAL's Shares" [Forbes]
(Photo: Cubbie_n_Vegas)

Our reader Eyebrows McGee pointed us to a fun, albeit slightly depressing (if you're concerned about the future of the human race) website called NotAlwaysRight.com, where retail veterans post transcripts of their worst customer interactions. Read for fun, but also for examples of how not to behave as a consumer.

Me: “Can I help you?”
Customer:“I’m looking for non-fiction.”
Me:“What kind?”
Customer: “Just non-fiction.”
Me: “Okay…do you want history? Or science? Psychology?
Business?”
Customer: “No, just NON-FICTION!”

Customer: “Tell me; is your cleaning solution toxic?”
Me: “You mean the stuff we use to clean fresh ear piercings?”
Customer: “Yah, that stuff.
Me: “Well no sir, I don’t believe it’s toxic. There isn’t really anything in here that–”
Customer: “–because I ingested a whole bunch of it!”
Me: “Why?”
Customer: “I was out of mouth wash. I needed mouth wash.”
Me: “But it isn’t mouth wash…it’s used to clean piercings…”
Customer: “I know, do you think I’m stupid?! That’s why I’m worried!”

Customer:“These things don’t work! They are hard to swallow and I nearly choked to death.”
Me: “Ma’am, they are suppositories. You don’t swallow them, you insert them rectally.”
Customer: “What does that mean?”
Me: “You unwrap them and insert them in your rectum.”
Customer: “What’s my rectum?”
Me: “Ma’am, please forgive me, but your rectum is your butt hole.”
Customer: “Well up yours too!” *stalks off*

(This is not the first time someone misunderstood when we explained how to use a suppository. It’s the only time we can tell a patient “up yours” and get away with it!)

www.notalwaysright.com

From The Street:

"Personal finance is not something that people talk about often. People have financial blunders, and the idea behind the contest is that you can learn from other people's mistakes," said Mint founder and CEO Aaron Patzer.

"Holiday Spending Hangover Contest" [Mint via The Street]

Step 2) Write a detailed account of the experience. By details we mean: names, dates, phone numbers, locations, addresses, prices, and other specifics. We need these because if you don't send them, our bullsh*t detector goes off and your email lands in the archive for future archaeologists to discover.

Step 3) Try to make your letter interesting, but don't try to be funny. We'll do that.

Step 4) Tell us about it at tips [at] consumerist [dot] com. Emailing this address will put your story in front of several pairs of eyes, some of which work.

Step 5) Dramatically increase your chances of being on the Consumerist by providing a photo. The photo can be of anything you like, we just like photos. People who take photos are cool. Have a complaint about your bill? Scan it. Don't like Bob's Auto Mart? Take a picture. Thank you. Photos can be uploaded to our Flickr pool.

Step 6) Experience the soothing power of the internet. Be sure to write to us and follow up. We like to know what happens when we post a story.

If we didn't post your story: We still love you and appreciate you. Don't feel like you can never submit another story. We can't post all of them. We try to pick complaints that will help people. (As in, not just you. )

If your complaint raises an issue that other people can benefit from you will have a much greater chance of being featured on this site. So help other people! Send us your story! —MEGHANN MARCO

(Photo: Jeremy Brooks)