The Future Of Shopping, Thanks To Weird Branding Advice

The Future Of Shopping, Thanks To Weird Branding Advice

Okay, we’re not 100% sure “Pottery Barn” is going to become “Barn” or “The Container Store” will become “Store,” but we’re halfway there. Keep up the good work, brand advisors!

Microsoft Retail Stores Prepare For Sensory Overload, Global Domination

Microsoft Retail Stores Prepare For Sensory Overload, Global Domination

This is old news to some of our readers, but not all: Microsoft is planning to open their own retail stores. What would such a wondrous place look like? Gizmodo has a concept Powerpoint presentation (what else?) that shows what the stores could look like.

Compact Fluorescent Light Bulbs: Some Assembly Required

Compact Fluorescent Light Bulbs: Some Assembly Required

Jim spotted this confusing sign at a Fry’s store in Campbell, Calif. On a display of compact fluorescent light bulbs, the store helpfully notes that some assembly is required. “Is it safe to assemble your own fluorescent light bulbs?” he wrote. “I mean with the dangerous mercury vapor and all?”

Man Goes Crazy, Gets Tasered After Store Refuses To Let Him Use Bathroom

Man Goes Crazy, Gets Tasered After Store Refuses To Let Him Use Bathroom

Village Lighting in Bellingham, Washington refused to let a 29-year-old man use their bathroom, and the man retaliated by going completely batshit insane on them.

REI Says ATM Photographer Is Welcome In Their Store Any Time

REI Says ATM Photographer Is Welcome In Their Store Any Time

REI’s Director of Corporate Communications contacted us with an official statement about the recent showdown between two Loomis security guards and a customer with an iPhone at one of their Seattle stores. She says despite the document Shane says he was forced to sign at the police station, he is not banned from their stores. Below is REI’s official statement.

Target Advertises To Overhead Planes, Orbiting Satellites, Alien Life Forms

Target Advertises To Overhead Planes, Orbiting Satellites, Alien Life Forms

Joshua sent us this link to the Google Maps aerial view of a Target store in Alexandria, Va. There’s something to be said for branding, advertising, and taking advantage of unused space, but maybe a giant bulls-eye isn’t the logo to start with.

Loomis Rent-A-Cops Have Shopper Cuffed, Hauled Away Over ATM Photo

Loomis Rent-A-Cops Have Shopper Cuffed, Hauled Away Over ATM Photo

While Shane was standing in the customer service line at a Seattle REI, he watched two Loomis employees open and change out the cash in an ATM machine. Shane took a photo of them with his iPhone. This apparently freaked out the Loomis guards, the REI security staff, and then the Seattle police, who put handcuffs on Shane, drove him to the police station, and then made him sign a statement that he wouldn’t return to a REI store for a year. You might have noticed in that summary that they didn’t actually bring any charges against him, which should make it clear to anyone who wants to side with the faux Po-Po that what Shane did wasn’t illegal, that the rent-a-cops should be fired, and that REI and Loomis owe Shane a big apology.

Circuit City Has Left Us, But Its Uniforms Live On

Circuit City Has Left Us, But Its Uniforms Live On

The Circuit City death watch is long over, but now there’s a way to preserve those memories forever—maybe even to outfit an entire troupe of Circuit City re-enactors. Reader chainofcommand02 was shopping in a grocery outlet store when he discovered several cases of Circuit City polo shirts. Yours, for only $1.00.

Why Do Some Stores Act Stupid About Coupons?

Why Do Some Stores Act Stupid About Coupons?

Some stores—like A&P Supermarkets and Bed Bath & Beyond, for example—seem to have a sort of antagonism against coupon users. (For that matter, some of our commenters do too, but they are wrong.) Steve Gosset notes on his “Reality Bites Back” blog that the shortsighted coupon policies at these two stores only ended up costing them more fees, or even a sale.

Disguised As Dishcloths Pile, Man Hides Inside IKEA

Disguised As Dishcloths Pile, Man Hides Inside IKEA

Some German’s art project is to engage in “urban camouflage” by creating three different ghillie suits made of bulk IKEA items: piles of dishcloths, boxes, and shopping bags. Then he goes and “hides” out in the open inside the IKEA, blending in with his surroundings and only disturbing shoppers when he moves. Hilarious, brilliant! Here are the videos so you get the full effect:

Time's Portrait Of The American Shopper

Time's Portrait Of The American Shopper

Time interviewed Paco Underhill, a retail consultant and the author of Why We Buy: The Science of Shopping, to find out how the average American consumer shops and thinks these days. Turns out, according to Underhill, there are three types of “average consumer” out there now, and—you may have noticed this already—the era of the big box retailer is in decline.

Is Target Too Expensive? Profit Down 41%

Is Target Too Expensive? Profit Down 41%

Consumers are cutting back — and the AP says that shoppers are abandoning Target for even cheaper stores. In addition, Target’s credit card division is running into trouble as shell-shocked shoppers aren’t able to pay their bills.

Ritz Camera Files For Bankruptcy

Ritz Camera Files For Bankruptcy

Ritz Camera, an occasional and colorful character on our blog (scam confessions! feedback bribery!) has just filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection.

When The Economy Gets Tough, The Tough Play Video Games

When The Economy Gets Tough, The Tough Play Video Games

As pretty much every retailer imaginable aside from Walmart loses money — one chain is not only doing fine, it’s actually growing — GameStop. It seems that when the going gets tough — people just want to play video games.

http://consumerist.com/2009/02/14/the-new-york-times-bits/

The New York Times’ Bits Blog posits a terrifying idea: what if they bring back Clippy to work the floor in the new Microsoft retail stores? “It looks like you’re trying to run out of the store in disgust!” [Bits]

AT&T Employee Misleads Customer, And Now He's Trapped In A 2-Year Contract

AT&T Employee Misleads Customer, And Now He's Trapped In A 2-Year Contract

A little over a month ago, Mark gave up on his GoPhone SIM, went into an AT&T store with his iPhone 2G in hand, and signed up for a new two year, post-paid plan. The sales rep promised Mark that his corporate discount would apply, and instead of a contract presented just a receipt. Now AT&T is saying there’s no corporate discount on an iPhone purchase—even though he didn’t buy an iPhone, just the service plan—and that he can’t cancel now without paying an ETF because it’s past the 30 day mark.

Urban Outfitters Employee Likes Being Flashed, Will Force You To Play Along

Urban Outfitters Employee Likes Being Flashed, Will Force You To Play Along

Miriam got a rude surprise at Urban Outfitters yesterday when she was trying on some clothes. Loud music doesn’t cover up the nipples, people; keep the changing room doors shut, or at least don’t laugh about it after exposing a customer.

http://consumerist.com/2008/12/30/according-to-bloomberg-retailers-expect/

According to Bloomberg, retailers expect to close 73,000 stores in the first half of 2009, because no one bought enough Christmas presents. Thanks, Marc!