(WHJG.com)

Florida Hotel Wakes Up Spring Breakers By Blasting ‘Lion King’ Theme Every Morning

There’s more than one way to wake a slumbering college student after a night spent drinking Jell-O shots and vigorously grinding all up on each other in the sweaty ritual booze mess that is known as Spring Break, but blasting loud music from an animated Disney movie is much nicer than getting a firehose involved, I suppose. [More]

(TheTruthAbout)

Silly Customer Thinks Reserving A Vehicle From Enterprise Means Anything

Dan chose Enterprise to rent a van for his spring break vacation because the company offered the lowest price. What they couldn’t offer him was a van. Somewhat naively, he thought that using Enterprise’s online reservation system to reserve a vehicle would result in an actual vehicle being rented to him. No such luck. Now he’s left scrambling for a vehicle large enough to accommodate everyone on his trip. [More]

Wal-Mart Spring Break! WOOOOO!

Wal-Mart Spring Break! WOOOOO!

(D’oh! Brownlee is an idiot. This is one of our few duplicate stories, the unfortunate consequence of having two writers working thousands of miles away from one another. But we’re going to leave it up as it gives us another ace-in-the-hole for when Brownlee greedily starts slobbering for an undeserved raise.