source documents

TSA Officer Pretended To Find Cocaine In Flyers' Bags

TSA Officer Pretended To Find Cocaine In Flyers' Bags

The Smoking Gun has procured internal TSA memos about the security officer who was fired after pulling jokes on travelers by pretending to find cocaine in their luggage. [More]

Now This Is How You Tell A Zombie Debt Collector To Buzz Off!

Now This Is How You Tell A Zombie Debt Collector To Buzz Off!

“RJM Acquisitions” mailed Mark a funny notice asking him to pay up $4,448.23. The address they had associated with it was indeed Mark’s, 20 years ago, that is. Not only was the debt invalid, but even if it hadn’t, the statute of limitations was well expired. Mark got to work and drafted a kickass letter to dispute the debt and tell them not to contact him again unless they wanted to be sued $1,000 each time. Here is his letter, which can serve as a good model for any other readers fighting off invalid debt collection attempts, and his story: [More]

30 Worst NJ Toll Collectors

30 Worst NJ Toll Collectors

Never give a New Jersey toll collector pennies. Never. Ever. Not unless you want to risk them being thrown in your face. That’s the lesson I learned from reading the 30 pages of customer complaints The Smoking Gun gathered by doing a Freedom of Information Act request on the State of New Jersey. And in between the suggestions to stay flashing suggestions, threats of strip search and violence, that state is very altered indeed. [More]

Sample Phone Scripts Used By Sleazy Subprime Lenders In 2005

Sample Phone Scripts Used By Sleazy Subprime Lenders In 2005

An ex-subprime lender employee of a sent us the scripts they used to cold-call homeowners back in 2005 to get them to ditch their 30-year fixed mortgages for risky sub-prime loans. One of them is called, “Wholesale Gangsta Script,” which I think about says it all right there. [More]

UPDATE: Every TWC Level III Phone Number

Hey gang! Remember 27 days ago when posted all those high up Time Warner Cable tech support phone numbers? And everyone was like, dude, this number is disconnected, this area code does not go with this town, and furthermore, you’re a dirty brick licker for posting them? Yeah, those were the days.

Northwest Airlines Dumpster Diving Booklet Revealed!

Northwest Airlines Dumpster Diving Booklet Revealed!

You don’t have to be a laid-off Northwest employee to appreciate these money-saving tips. We’ve uploaded the same booklet they gave their recently fired employees and they offer savvy savings for all of us.

EXCLUSIVE: Every Phone Number For TWC Level 3 Tech Support

EXCLUSIVE: Every Phone Number For TWC Level 3 Tech Support

Your Time Warner Cable is messing up. It can’t be fixed by merely turning the modem on and off. You’ve called technical support but they’re useless. You need Level 3 Tech support. That’s the tier at which they can actually help you with the more difficult technical problems.

The Hatchet Man of AOL Retention

The Hatchet Man of AOL Retention

Here’s a little ditty about an AOL hatchet man who took a perverse pleasure in firing retention consultants.

Cingular Wants To Yank Docs From Consumerist

Cingular Wants To Yank Docs From Consumerist

Here is the note Cingular’s legal counsel sent us to take down documents we posted. The items have info about how Cingular determines a customer’s “long term value” or “LTV.” This LTV is used to determine how many discounts they will give you to prevent you from cancelling your account.

Cingular Wants Us To Take Their Documents Down

Cingular Wants Us To Take Their Documents Down

We just received a note from Cingular’s legal department.

AOL Don’t Wanna Talk Bout No Manual

AOL Don’t Wanna Talk Bout No Manual

CNet got AOL on the horn to talk about the AOL retention manual we uploaded, but the big triangle didn’t have much to say, except for:

How Cingular Avoids Giving Discounts to Worthless Customers

How Cingular Avoids Giving Discounts to Worthless Customers

A snip from a recent memo that teaches Cingular retention specialists how to avoid giving discounts to customers they deem unprofitable.

Cingular Distills Customer Value Into Thermometer Form

Cingular Distills Customer Value Into Thermometer Form

A customer service source inside Cingular sends us some interesting internal documents and says the cellphone company has a new policy that’s got the headset set in a bind. He reports that Cingular will, “no longer discount equipment for customers that are not profitable for us, no mater where they stand contractually. I have received several calls from customers attempting to upgrade, only to have to inform them that although yes, they are out of contract, we will not offer them discounted equipment. “

AOL Retention Manual Uploaded in Full

AOL Retention Manual Uploaded in Full

And finally, here is the full AOL retention manual, along with flowchart. Right click

AOL Retention Manual Revealed

AOL Retention Manual Revealed

In August of 2005, America Online settled with the office of NY Attorney General Eliot Spitzer over complaints about how arduous AOL made it to cancel service. In addition to a $1.25 million fine, AOL agreed to streamline the cancellation process and submit all calls for third-party review. On June 13, 2006, Vincent Ferrari posted a recording he made of his attempt to leave America Online. It shot to national TV and revealed AOL hadn’t learned the error of its ways. For “John,” the call center employee heard on the tape, to deploy the kind of mental warfare heard on the tape, he had to be well-trained…

AOL Employees Slander Vincent Ferrari On Company Time

AOL Employees Slander Vincent Ferrari On Company Time

This is not the AOL manual. So acclimated to squirting off-the-cuff posts, throwing haymakers at peccadilloes, the prospect of three-plus pages, single-spaced, is a bit daunting. It needs more editing and is sleeping soundly in a drawer. The material is so wrong, we have to make sure we do it right.

Page From AOL Retention Manual

Page From AOL Retention Manual

We’re putting the finishing touches on our big post on the AOL manual but wanted to release this sneak peak…

A Little Birdy Went Tweet Tweet….

A Little Birdy Went Tweet Tweet….

…in the coal mine.