Consumerist: Signs

All Airports Should Have A Recombobulation Area Like The One In Milwaukee

Meg Marco — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 16:59:32 EST

Today is a travel day for millions of Americans, so we thought we'd focus on the positive. Here's a good idea that needs to catch on. Milwaukee's Mitchell International Airport has a sign after their TSA check point that reads "Recombobulation Area."

It's just a little patch of carpet with a few chairs, but the sign makes people smile.

"See? You're getting recombobulated right now," Melissa Fullmore said Tuesday morning to another traveler who was putting on his belt.

Airport draws smiles with 'recombobulation' sign [JS Online]
(Photo: lark is already taken )

Our National Debt Has Outgrown The 'National Debt Clock' In NYC

Chris Walters — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 17:23:27 EDT

Now that we've hit double-digit trillions, the "National Debt" clock that's been running constantly since 1989 in New York City's midtown can no longer properly display the total. Brian Williams says they've had to temporarily adjust the display while they build a new one, slated to go up next year. We're not sure anyone should be spending money on a fancy new hi-tech clock right now—maybe they should just hang a big chalk board, and hire an unemployed investment banker to write the new debt each day. See the video below.

For the deaf, those without speakers, people at work, or people too impatient for video, here's a handy caption of what it says:

We also wanted to show you a rather grim sign of our times. It's not far here from here in midtown Manhattan. The national debt has grown too large for the national debt clock.

It went up back in 1989 when the nation's debt was less than 3 trillion dollars. The debt has been piling up so fast lately they had to drop the dollar sign to make room for an extra digit, as the number turned over to more than 10 trillion dollars now and counting every second.

A whole new clock with two extra spaces will go up next year.

"U.S. National Debt Grows Too Large For Clock" [YouTube via Towleroad]

Mykl Roventine has an amazing set of photos ...

Chris Walters — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 14:54:49 EDT

Mykl Roventine has an amazing set of photos of last year's Minnesota State Fair over at Flickr. It's a confetti-colored slice of Americana, and a great collection of both fair food and the signage that advertises it. Cheer yourself up. [MN State Fair at Flickr]

This WaMu Sign Is Incredibly Accurate

Chris Walters — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 08:37:29 EDT

Mark writes:

I'm currently a Chase customer, but my brother is WaMu. As he was walking down the street in Brooklyn the other night, he managed to catch this picture.

That's one smart sign.

This Wendy's Frosty is even more delicious ...

Chris Walters — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 17:49:36 EDT

This Wendy's Frosty is even more delicious than the one we posted about yesterday. Dear Wendy's managers, at least mark through the word "more" if you're going to list the total price. (Thanks to Chris!)

This Frosty Must Be Delicious

Chris Walters — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 15:50:03 EDT

Consumerist reader David saw this awesome special in his local Wendy's restaurant. We wonder what kind of special magic goes into a Frosty to warrant a $5.99 price increase. Bacon grease? Extra HFCS? A no-spit guarantee? A short song and dance from the cashier? Or maybe they spend the extra money on "how to label signs properly" classes for the staff.

This Dollar Store Taunts You With The Past

Chris Walters — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 16:04:22 EDT

Can there be any sadder indication of our toilet-water economy than a dollar store that references its own happier, cheaper past? This New York City dollar store has pulled down its old sign, "Everything 99¢ Or Less," and rebranded.

Sometimes truth in advertising hurts, especially when you can still see the outline of the former sign above the new one.

Update: The new sign may have actually gone up a while back, in which case it's more an illustration of NYC's high cost of living than current inflation. Even if that's the case, you'd think they'd do something about the remnants of that old sign taunting everyone.

Update #2: Another reader, David, sent us a picture he took last summer of the same store. It appears "99¢ Dreams" is in a constant state of naming flux:

We sort of like "OR LESS OR MORE" as a slogan—makes it seem more like a carnival game, somehow.

(Thanks to Larry!)

Sign Of The Times: $100 "Pay At The Pump" Limit

Meg Marco — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 09:59:51 EDT

Reader Paul sends in this photo of a sign he saw at a gas station in Texas. First people were upset that gas stations were putting "outrageously high" holds of $100 on their cards when they paid at the pump. Now $100 is just the most you can buy at the pump without going inside and having them swipe your card. Sad.

Here's a Washington Post article about consumers who aren't able to fill their gas tanks for the usual (former?) "pay at the pump" limit of $75.

One expert explains:

The average station makes a profit of $60 at the pump per day, says Jeff Lenard, a spokesman for the National Association of Convenience Stores. "It's not uncommon to lose money selling gas. So the idea of losing $20 or $50 [in charge backs] is too much."
...
Stations "are faced with two bad options — allow the pump to go beyond $75 and risk not getting paid . . . or take a customer from frustrated [with gas prices] to outright anger," Lenard said.

At the Pump And Past The Limit [Washington Post]

This Coffee Shop's Restroom Policy Is Extremely Subtle

Meg Marco — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 12:38:42 EDT

We were talking about pay toilets and restroom policies yesterday, which we can only assume is what prompted reader Stephen to share this photo of a sign he noticed at a coffee shop in Denver, CO. Stephen thinks it's a "real thirst whetter." We couldn't agree more.

Subway Says Get Off Your Phone Or Go To The Back Of The Line

Meg Marco — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 16:45:43 EDT

Sean says he approves of the this sign that he saw at an Idaho Subway location today, but his wife wasn't a fan...

My wife thought it was ridiculous, but I kind of like the idea of sending those annoying line-talkers to the back.

Well, you know us, we're always biased toward the consumer.... but those line-talkers are on their own this time.

Is Target Intentionally Using Its "Special Deals" To Screw Over Customers?

Chris Walters — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 10:17:01 EDT

Dan can do math in his head, which is a great skill these days when you're checking out the n objects for x price! specials at Target. In this case, Dan notes that the "temporary price cut" is so temporary that it doesn't even exist: you'll pay 13 cents more per box if you buy three of them. This is the third Target "special" we've seen this month that screws the consumer. Are we seeing a new trend? Is it legal to call it a price cut if it's not?

Update: here's a better photo of the sign, as requested by EtoilePB:

This Car Seat Is Finally On Sale!

Chris Walters — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 12:41:14 EDT

If you've been waiting to buy the fancy Britax car seat and you live in New Jersey, now's your chance. It was spotted by a bargain-shopping Consumerist reader who says he wishes he'd waited until it was on sale to buy one.

(Thanks to Patrick!)

English Speaking Contractors Save A Little Extra At This Home Depot

Meg Marco — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 09:38:24 EDT

Reader Curt saw this sign at Home Depot. He writes:

Se Habla Espanol? Hope not.

Apparently, speaking English saves you $50 as a Home Depot Contractor.

Whoops...

Publix Helpfully Suggests That You Shop At Winn-Dixie

Meg Marco — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 10:59:24 EDT

Kevin was shopping at the Publix in Birmingham, AL when he spotted this helpful sign.

Kevin says:

I just had to take a picture and send it to you. Maybe we should start shopping at Winn Dixie?

Oh, I don't know, Kevin. Perhaps you should reward Publix for their unflinching honesty? Or something?

Why Are The Employees At This Store So Sad?

Chris Walters — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 11:09:12 EDT

Jean writes:

I was browsing in a local shopping center today and I came across the greatest tee shirt hung on display outside their door. My husband started turning it over looking for a price tag and I almost fell over laughing when he uncovered the treasure it had buried.

Sorry Girls, This McDonald's Is All Out Of Boy Toys

Carey — Sat, 24 May 2008 00:00:00 EDT

[May 17, 2008. Fairfax, Virginia. Image thanks to Jose!]

Does that mean there's another sign boasting: Girls! Girls! Girls!?

Dunkin Doesn't Serve Cup O' Ice Water Or Any Variant Thereof

Ben Popken — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 14:26:39 EDT

You gotta wonder what lead up to the creation of this sign at a Dunkin Donuts in Bushwick (a DMZ-esque area of Brooklyn being penetrated by the forces of gentrification) covering every possible angle of not giving you a cup of ice water. Maybe there were even previous versions of the sign that had to keep being tweaked as people kept coming in asking for a vessel of chilled H20. How might that encounter have gone? Let's take a peek inside The Consumerist Miniature Theater Machine:

"Can I have some ice water?"
"No ice water, read the sign."
"Ok then, how about an empty cup?"
"No."
"Why not, it's not on the sign?"
"Get out! I call cops!"
"I'm coming back with my boxcutter, just as soon as my friend is done using it to hold up struggling musicians."
Door slams.
"Damn, we need to make a more comprehensive sign."

Annnd scene. Hey, at least they're celebrating earth day by reusing the buy 6 donuts get 6 free signs.

Free H20 In Any State, Won't Be Served At Dunkin' Donuts [ANIMAL]

"This Is Verizon Calling To Confirm Your Appointment. We're Sorry We Missed You..."

Meg Marco — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 08:42:48 EST

We found this photo on Flickr and were comforted to know that other people had not only thought of decorating their house for Verizon day, but had actually gone ahead with the plan.

Had it been us, we would have used a whiteboard and wrote "UPS" instead of "Verizon."

The caption reads:

this is my friend robin's house. the story itself is left as an exercise to the reader.

(Photo:quinnums)

FYE: No Kids Under 18 Allowed Until After 4 P.M.

Carey — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 09:15:55 EST

The bus-eating abominable snowmen that commandeered I-95 early yesterday morning flummoxed our plans to return to New York on the Chinatown bus. As we wandered through Union Station assuring our mother that we would take Amtrak, we came across this magnificent sign in the music store FYE telling kids under 18—presumably a key demographic—to keep away until 4 p.m. As our friend took a picture, a surly FYE employee sternly warned that we were breaking the law.

Taking pictures is not illegal, but FYE—like any private store—can always ask anyone to leave. We said we deleted the pictures (whoops!), but that false friendly gesture wasn't enough to get an explanation for the sign. You know FYE employees, the menacing youths might leave you alone if you were nicer. Something to consider. Regardless, thanks for the sign. It made our day.

(Photo: Robert Koeth III)

CompUSA Sign Maker: Funny Or Just Dumb?

Chris Walters — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 11:31:03 EST

Tyson from New Hampshire writes,

On my way to pick up a replacement hard drive I swung into CompUSA first to see if I could get a lucky deal (that wasn't marked up right before going on sale) from their going out of business sale...

The place was fairly well cleaned out, and there were no hard drives to speak of, so I looked around to see if there were any targets of opportunity. On my way through the software aisle, I saw the sign attached above. You think maybe they should keep some of that software for themselves

Our favorite touch is the "Hooked on Phonics" directly beneath it. Adds Tyson, "If they can't spell 'educational', I'm not feeling confident they have the math skills to get my 25% off right."

(Thanks to Tyson!)

On The Final Day Of The Barnes & Noble's Existence, Chaos

Meg Marco — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 23:30:04 EST

The above photo was snapped on the final day in the life of the Astor Place Barnes & Noble in New York City.

The photographer suggests, "For the new year, fellow bibliophiles, let's resolve not to defile our remaining bookstores in this way."

Indeed. If you've never lived or worked New York City trust me when I say that rather than move here out of curiosity, you can simply look at this photo and know exactly what it is like.

B&N: A Sorid Epitath [BlogChelsea via Racked]
(Photo:BlogChelsea)

Walmart Would Like You To Know That They Accept All Forms Of Debit

Meg Marco — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 13:39:53 EST

Meg: Accepted?
Ben: it must mean they take all forms of debit
Meg: Yep.
Meg: I can't post typo things though. Too hypocritical.
Meg: I'd have to write, "Further proof that Walmart's grammar is only marginally better than my own."
Ben: aw
Ben: then the terrorists have already won

That doesn't even look like a word. [Writing on the Wal]
(Photo:Tim and Cheryl Stolberg)

"Hoh Hoh" Says Wal-Mart

Chris Walters — Mon, 17 Dec 2007 20:34:45 EST

The War on Christmas has taken a sneaky left turn, with Coke and Wal-Mart mounting an entirely unanticipated attack on one of the world's most beloved phrases! A reader, Josh, was shopping and/or protesting in his local Wal-Mart recently when he saw this in-store display for soda.

Okay, seriously: is there some sort of Adbusters-financed shadow organization that's sneaking intentionally bad sign makers into our discount superstore workforce? Or do we need to start searching for an emoticon that represents "Idiocracy"? Huh huh?

(Thanks to Josh!)

Lemon Pricing At Meijer Is Very Straightforward

Meg Marco — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 17:11:36 EST

Reader Tim says:

I saw this in a Meijer store in Grand Rapids, MI this summmer. Finally got it off of my cell phone and thought I'd send it your way. I'm still confused by it. I believe they were actually $2 per lemon when I rang one up.

So, apparently the sign really means: "Lemons $2.00 each." That's a pricey lemon, we hope you did not buy it.

This sign is probably taught in existential philosophy classes.

(Photo: Tim)

IKEA: It's Your Last Chance To Save Nothing

Meg Marco — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 14:12:12 EDT

IKEA would like you to know that it's your last chance to save on the HEJ tealight holder.

(Photo:Thanks, Matt!)

This IKEA Infographic Is Extremely Easy To Understand

Meg Marco — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 17:58:31 EDT

BoingBoing has an infographic from IKEA that seems like a good idea at first, but then makes your brain hurt if you look at it for too long.

BoingBoing Reader Matt says:

This is a picture of Ikea's "Optimal" shopping hours. At first glance, it seems like a good idea, and a good chart to follow. If you actually try to figure it out though, it makes no sense. It appears to be a 12 hour clock, but it also appears to reference 24 hour time. What?

Why did they choose this format? It sucks. We'll translate:

M-F 10-9, sorta busy from 7-9.
S 9-9, Busy as hell. Show up before noon(ish).
Sun 10-8, Busy as hell. Show up before noon.

We posit that anyone who has ever tried to set foot in an IKEA after 12pm on a weekend is in possession of this information.

Bad info-graphic: Ikea shopping hours chart [BoingBoing]
(Photo:Matt)

UPDATE: A BoingBoing reader offers this revision.

(Photo:buriednexttoyou)

Phone Shop's Name Looks Oddly Familiar

Chris Walters — Wed, 19 Sep 2007 17:11:49 EDT

The owner of this mobile phone and accessory store in NYC has found a creative way to re-use some existing signage. It's not exactly as genius as the "COBY" brand you see on low-rent CD players and headphones, but it gets the job done.

Other ideas for mobile store signs once the original owner has vacated: AT&Tractive Mobile, erizon, and Sprinth.

(Photo: Chris Walters)

Walmart Rolls Back Prices Negative One Dollar And Fifty-Nine Cents

Ben Popken — Mon, 17 Sep 2007 13:48:25 EDT

Nowadays it seems like anyone can make a sign. I yearn for the olde days of sign making when you actually had to know something about signmaking to do it. Signmaking was restricted to knowledgeable guild workers. The penalty for non-guild workers making signs was death. By signmaking.

(Photo: Jeff Holbrook)

This Road Side Sign For Roses Is Not At All Misleading

Meg Marco — Thu, 13 Sep 2007 19:59:45 EDT

According to LAist, this small roadside sandwich board type sign is visible "as you drive down Sunset Blvd. eastbound toward Vermont." As you can see, it's extremely honest.

The Most Deceptive Sign in LA [Laist via BoingBoing]
(Photo:Sonny I. LaVista for LAist)

Lazy Home Depot Employees Declare Fully Functioning Saw Inoperative

Carey — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 14:34:11 EDT

Home Deport employees didn't feel like using the saw, so they hung a sign that claimed: "saw not working." This offended marketing guru Seth Godin:

When I noticed this sign on the big saw, I took a picture, intending to write about how important it was to have key customer service feat ures up and running. Then, a few minutes later, a guy in an orange smock walked over, took the sign down and asked what he could cut for us.
It turns out (at this Home Depot, anyway), that whenever they don't feel like using the saw, they pretend it's broken. (Yes, technically, they didn't say 'broken,' they said 'not working,' which is sort of true. Except it was the saw operator who wasn't working.)

Oh, Home Depot. Really, what were you possibly thinking?

Lying to your customers [Seth Godin's Blog]

This Walmart Sign Shows Excellent Attention To Detail

Carey — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 09:58:52 EDT

[Texarkana, Texas. August 9]

Of the misspelling, one Texarkana associate said, "I'm not surprised, it's not the first time." Perhaps the corporate overseers in Bentonville should consult the Franklin Children's Talking Dictionary & Spell Corrector.

This Verizon Van Could Have Parked Closer To The Handicapped Only Sign

Carey — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 10:35:34 EDT

A 14-year-old tipster caught this Verizon van parked next to the handicapped only sign outside his grandmother's house. The Verizon tech spent 20 minutes visiting a neighbor, and when asked to move, "was very arrogant and drove off." More pictures, after the jump.

Starbucks Prefers Not To Make You Ill

Meg Marco — Mon, 30 Jul 2007 11:58:27 EDT

Reader Patrick sent us this photo of a Starbucks that was unwilling to poison its customers. He says, " Hurray for having a conscience!"

That's a sentiment we can agree with.

Excellent Spelling At Duane Reade

Meg Marco — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 15:29:52 EDT

Submitted to our Flickr pool, an excellent sign at the Duane Reade on E. 51st in NYC.

Hey, we all make mistakes.—MEGHANN MARCO

This Just In: The Cooler [I Hate Duane Reade]
(Photo: instantly)

Home Depot Thinks 'Lorem Ipsum' Is Spanish

Meg Marco — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 22:59:55 EDT

Consumerist Flickr Pool member brylyn says, "Saw this while shopping for ceiling lights in Home Depot."

For those of you not familiar with "lorem ipsum," it's commonly used placeholder text dating from the 1500's. The text was created by scrambling words from a passage of "de Finibus Bonorum et Malorum" (The Extremes of Good and Evil) by Marcus Tullius Cicero. —MEGHANN MARCO

(Photo: brylyn)

99 Dreams Subject To Availability

Ben Popken — Thu, 30 Nov 2006 22:18:06 EST

Snip from the Stay Free! blog:

"99 Dreams has long been my favorite 99-cent store. It is the kind of realist thinking that allows people to feel good about themselves. Why reach for the stars when you can reach for an offbrand 59-watt light bulb?

But there is no such thing as a free lunch, even in 99 Dreamland."

— BEN POPKEN

On Sale. Or Not. [Stay Free Daily!]