Will These Employees Please Stop Hijacking My Cart?

Will These Employees Please Stop Hijacking My Cart?

B. keeps getting cart-jacked in big-box stores. Not by fellow customers envious of the amazing bargains she finds, but by store employees eager to clean up the store who think that her unattended cart has been abandoned. Not so, she insists, raising another question altogether: how long can you reasonably expect to leave your cart alone before it is, indeed, cartjacked? [More]

Pennies Are "Bacteria-Ridden Disks Of Suck"

Pennies Are "Bacteria-Ridden Disks Of Suck"

Caffeinated vlogger John Green of the Vlogbrothers outlines the case against pennies. Namely that it costs 1.6 cents to make one, and we could save taxpayers billions if we got rid of them but don’t because of sentimental clinging. He really loathes pennies, referring to the one-cent pieces as “disgusting bacteria-ridden disks of suck that fail to facilitate commerce.” [More]

Theater Chain Fights Back Against Texting During Movies

Theater Chain Fights Back Against Texting During Movies

I don’t go to the movies much these days because I’m in NYC, and I don’t want bedbugs crawling all over me like that scene in Peter Jackson’s King Kong remake. But if I did go to the movies, I wouldn’t, because the last several times I went there was always some fool texting within my line of sight. Now a theater chain based in Arizona is launching a nationwide campaign to try to get through to these self-involved types that texting in a darkened theater is wrong. [More]

Fake Steve Jobs Rants About The Decline Of American Quality

Fake Steve Jobs Rants About The Decline Of American Quality

While reading articles about the iPhone and AT&T this morning, I came across Fake Steve Jobs, which I haven’t read in a long time. On Saturday Fake Steve Jobs had a phone call with an even more fake Randall Stephenson of AT&T, and the fake conversation reaches a brilliant, hilarious Network-level rant against big business about halfway through. [More]

Airline Employees Call Police On Angry CEO Who Chewed Them Out

Airline Employees Call Police On Angry CEO Who Chewed Them Out

This story combines two immutable laws of nature in a surprising twist: that executives don’t always know what their front-line employees are doing, and that airline employees don’t give a f*ck who you are and will call the police if you annoy them.

What Do The Notes On Your Account Really Say?

What Do The Notes On Your Account Really Say?

Pretty much every problematic customer service story these days includes some reference to the Notes—that unseen record of what you’ve been told, and by inference what you’ve agreed to, on previous calls. The funny thing is, you never get to see them.

United Adds $800 In Fees To $560 Trip, Loses Customer For Life

United Adds $800 In Fees To $560 Trip, Loses Customer For Life

And let’s not forget the exorbitant booking fee for using miles for one of our tickets. The actual FLIGHT was only $280 round trip per ticket, but with the booking fee TO USE THE MILES TO PURCHASE A TICKET, we wound up paying over $500.

Domino's Pizza: Sacrificing Our Delivery Drivers So We Can Use Our New Slogan

Domino's Pizza: Sacrificing Our Delivery Drivers So We Can Use Our New Slogan

Domino’s has a mildly amusing television campaign right now to promote their new slogan “You Got 30 Minutes,” but the fine print on Domino’s site points out that this should be taken only as a suggestion, not a service guarantee: “Because safety is a priority “You Got 30 Minutes™” is not a guarantee but an estimate. You may get more.” A former Domino’s delivery guy is not impressed: “Some douchebag ad exec wants to trick customers into believing that the ’30 minutes or it’s free’ guarantee is back, then leave it to the delivery drivers to explain to inevitably angry customers why their pizza isn’t free when it gets there in 31 minutes.”

"HughesNet is Absolutely, Without A Doubt, The Worst Company I Have Ever Had The Misfortune of Relying On"

"HughesNet is Absolutely, Without A Doubt, The Worst Company I Have Ever Had The Misfortune of Relying On"

Reader Jeff isn’t pleased with HughesNet and has cc’d us on his email so that we can listen in. It’s more of a warning than a specific complaint that can be resolved:

I would just like to take this opportunity to reiterate, for the hundredth time, how much I loathe HughesNet. I have just been FAPed again. No one here is downloading any movies, music, books, or much of anything — just using the Internet. I have a guest visiting, and I’m assuming their additional drain on the ridiculously small 375 MB cap we’re afforded is what’s knocked us over the limit…so now I’m stuck at sub-dialup speeds for the next 24 hours.

The Sun And I Hate My Dell Laptop's Screen

The Sun And I Hate My Dell Laptop's Screen

I was very close to tossing my computer through some glass this morning.

IRS Tells NSA How to Do Its Job

IRS Tells NSA How to Do Its Job

The IRS just fact-checked the NSA’s wiretapping ass.

Man vs. Cell Phone Company: The Epic

Man vs. Cell Phone Company: The Epic

…a David [and] Goliath story…

Continental’s Tagline Enrages Man, to Comedic Effect

Continental’s Tagline Enrages Man, to Comedic Effect

Continental’s tagline always reminds us off that old jazz standard about heroin addiction, “Straighten Up and Fly Right.”

The Kid From Brooklyn on The Rising Price of Sex, or “A Slow News Day”

It’s a slow news day. Prematurely celebrating St. Patrick’s Day, Ben is drunk. Meanwhile, Brownlee has discovered with a dawning sense of horror that after years of living in Ireland, he is incapable of getting drunk… the font that inks his pen, the mucus that lubricates his Muse. As the world and Boing Boing watches, we find ourselves abashed and silent.

“Stick It Up Your Ass, Starbucks”

re serving over there? Fuckin liquid gold? A fucking cup of coffee and a piece of pound cake, seven dollars? Stick it up your ass, fuckin Starbucks.”