Heroic cripple motors to local Circuit City, drags his limbless torso in by a combination of Prince Randian-like body undulations and chin dragging. Purchases new battery for tongue-controlled wheelchair. Declines service plan. Vengeful Circuit City employee, denied a commission, cackles evilly as blasts of lightning streak behind him, casting him in penumbric silhouette. Makes handicapped customer carry wheelchair battery to the car himself.
By June 26, 2006