Yeah, It's Pretty Much Chaos At Delta/Northwest Right Now

Yeah, It's Pretty Much Chaos At Delta/Northwest Right Now

Adding to the problems caused by snowstorms, travel delays, and a general lack of communication in the skies today, readers report that Delta’s and Northwest’s computer systems are still not integrated, resulting in some completely un-hilarious travel snafus. [More]

TSA Martinet Claims Her Unpublished Rules Trump Real Ones

TSA Martinet Claims Her Unpublished Rules Trump Real Ones

TSA, can you at least train your agents to do their jobs properly? We’d appreciate it even more if you’d discipline (read: fire) those who go all stupidly power-mad and think they have to “win” every encounter, even when it means making up new rules on the spot. Here’s a story of a soldier who lost a day of leave because one of your agents caused so much trouble. In the end, the soldier says he’s happy with the outcome—”Using standard Consumerist customer service doctrine (polite, patient, proper channels and then EECB), I won”—but we’re still floored by how difficult you made his trip home. Oh, and NWA, you were no help either.

Mad Pizza's Hold Music: "Yeah, I'm a gangsta, but still I got flavor"

Mad Pizza's Hold Music: "Yeah, I'm a gangsta, but still I got flavor"

Forget muzak, Seattle-based Mad Pizza decided to spice up their hold music by playing N.W.A’s “Fuck Tha Police.” Clint Brownlee over at Seattlest made the discovery on Sunday night while trying to order a pizza.

When the Mad Pizza dude picked up the line again we were conflicted–should we ask if he knew (or cared) what people on hold were hearing? Should we pretend to be offended and hang up? We stammered and, lacking the adventurous nature of our 15-year old self, just ordered a pizza.

We would gladly listen to N.W.A rather than the bland mix of soft jazz or lite rock most companies use to avoid offending anyone’s delicate sensibilities. Do you care what you listen to while on hold? Tell us in the comments. — CAREY GREENBERG-BERGER

NWA Worker Ejaculates On Passenger

NWA Worker Ejaculates On Passenger

WCCO: An off-duty Northwest Airlines employee was arrested after a woman on a flight from Seattle complained that the man had ejaculated on her.

Copy of the complaint filed by, interestingly enough, an FBI agent assigned to the International Terrorism Squad, inside. Apparently, there might be some concern that a squad of these fellows could take over a plane with ejaculate. Think about it, the entire plane could be incapacitated by a clutch of capable gents, especially if they were violating the 3 oz rule.

Fake Boarding Pass Creator Goes Free

Fake Boarding Pass Creator Goes Free

Cnet is reporting that the creator of the fake NWA boarding pass generator has been freed and all charges dropped due to lack of criminal intent on his part. “They’ve given me back my passports, my computers, and I’ll be getting the rest of my stuff back shortly. Essentially, I’m a free man–with no charges filed,” Christopher Soghoian wrote on his blog Tuesday, talking about the investigation by the FBI and the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the Southern District of Indiana.

Newark Airport Screeners Fail To Find Hidden Weapons In Federal Test

Screeners at Newark fail to find ‘weapons’ [The Star Ledger via Mere Rhetoric]

Boarding Pass Dude’s Computers Seized, Public Service Praised

BoingBoing is really your one-stop shop but:

Fake NWA Boarding Pass Site Removed, Creator Visited By FBI

Fake NWA Boarding Pass Site Removed, Creator Visited By FBI

The creator of the NWA Boarding Pass Generator has taken down his site after coming under heavy national scrutiny.

NWA Boarding Pass Generator

NWA Boarding Pass Generator

UPDATE: Actually using this at an airport could get you arrested, so don’t.