Pimp Sues Nike For Not Warning Against Use Of Shoes As Dangerous Face-Stomping Weapons

Pimp Sues Nike For Not Warning Against Use Of Shoes As Dangerous Face-Stomping Weapons

A man convicted of second-degree assault after beating a john’s face to a pulp with his Jordans is now suing Nike from his jail cell — where he’s serving a 100-year prison sentence for his crimes — for not warning consumers that the shoes could be used as a dangerous weapon. [More]

(.sanden.)

San Francisco Accidentally Directs Callers Complaining About The Marathon To Sex Line

Why is that every time we hear about a city or otherwise very public entity getting a phone number wrong, it’s inevitable that callers end up dialing a sex line? The Surprise! This Is A Phone Sex Number And Not The Number You Were Looking For phenomenon struck San Francisco residents trying to complain about Sunday’s Nike Marathon. [More]

North is up a-ways.

Nike Pulls Panthers T-Shirt Because North Carolina Is Not Shaped Like South Carolina

States come in all kinds of funny shapes and sizes — that one’s squiggly, that one’s a rectangle and that one is a mitten, see? — so we can see how someone just eyeballing a state’s outline could get it wrong. Perhaps someone at Nike forget to check a map before printing up a batch of Carolina Panthers T-shirts with the team logo and an “NC” inside a the outline of a state. [More]

(ThisLifesABlur)

Nike Announces It Will No Longer Make Livestrong Foundation Products

It appears that it wasn’t enough for Nike to dump Lance Armstrong, he of bicycling/doping allegations fame: Seven months after Armstrong stepped down from his position as chairman of the Livestrong Foundation’s board, Nike seems to be distancing itself even further from the fallen cyclist by announcing that it will be ending its deal with Livestrong and will no longer make products like the ubiquitous yellow bracelets. [More]

‘Boston Massacre’ Nike Shirts Garner High Asking Prices On eBay After Being Pulled From Stores

‘Boston Massacre’ Nike Shirts Garner High Asking Prices On eBay After Being Pulled From Stores

In the wake of recent events, it’s not surprising that Nike would want to stop selling shirts that feature the phrase “Boston Massacre,” complete with blood-stained letters. So of course it probably comes as little shock that folks who have these shirts are now trying to unload them for high prices on eBay. [More]

(Atwater Village Newbie)

Nike Assured Me An Android App For FuelBand Was In The Works, Ditches That Plan, Shrugs

Consumerist reader Jeremy is a fan of Nike’s FuelBand, a fitness tracking wristband that’s become pretty popular in the workout world. But he has an Android phone and currently there’s only an iOS app that syncs up with the FuelBand. So he asked Nike Support on Twitter if it’d be releasing a Droid version and was pleased when it replied that yes, the app was in the works. Cut to today when Nike announced it’s ditching that idea. [More]

Detroit Sneaker Store Offers Free Nikes To Kids Who Show Up For School

Detroit Sneaker Store Offers Free Nikes To Kids Who Show Up For School

October 3 is Student Count Day in Detroit. A headcount will be made of all the kids in school that day, and that figure will be used to determine state and federal funding. It will also earn free sneakers for every student who decides to show up. [More]

Nike GPS Watch Breaks, Locks Up Your Running Data Forever

Nike GPS Watch Breaks, Locks Up Your Running Data Forever

Jose doesn’t want a free replacement for his out-of-warranty Nike GPS watch. He doesn’t even want a free repair. He just wishes that the company would offer in-house repair options for the device, which he paid $160 for. His watch has what looks like a hardware issue, but he can’t be sure. His run data is locked up on the watch, and he can’t get it out. The only option is a third-party service that charges $12 just to look at the watch. [More]

Five Big American Businesses Teaming Up To Develop Plant-Based Plastic

Five Big American Businesses Teaming Up To Develop Plant-Based Plastic

Coca-Cola might be super proprietary about its secret soda formula, but when it comes to sharing technology that could help the earth, it’s willing to to spread the wealth with other big American businesses. Coca-Cola, Ford, Heinz, Nike and Procter & Gamble announced today they’ve teamed up to work on how to develop plant-based plastic material. [More]

Nike & Reebok Fight Over Who Gets To Shill Tim Tebow Apparel

Nike & Reebok Fight Over Who Gets To Shill Tim Tebow Apparel

Now that NFL quarterback Tim Tebow (have ya heard of him?) is moving his field praying to the New York Jets from the Denver Broncos, that means his new set of fans needs green clothing emblazoned with his name. But seems Nike thinks Reebok went about doing that the wrong way — they’re suing, citing unfair competition. [More]

Nike To The Irish: Sorry We Named Black And Tan Sneakers After A Violent Paramilitary Group

Nike To The Irish: Sorry We Named Black And Tan Sneakers After A Violent Paramilitary Group

Nike’s gone and stuck its Black and Tan foot right in its mouth where the Irish are concerned, naming a new sneaker after a drink popular in the U.S. and Britain that also happens to be the name of a violent paramilitary group in 1920s Ireland. [More]

Cops Called To Florida Mall To Prevent Yet Another Riot Over Nike Shoes

Crazed consumers fairly foaming at the mouth over a new release from Nike which was timed to celebrate the NBA All-Star Game in Orlando, had to be subdued by cops in riot gear at one Florida mall Thursday night. This isn’t the first time a shoe has stirred up such extreme reactions, of course, and we doubt it will be the last. [More]

Starting A Mall-Closing Riot Won't Make Those Cool New Shoes Any Less Sold Out

There is no way to go back in time and have those super neat sneaks you want be the opposite of sold out. So you know what you shouldn’t do? Start a brawl that ends up closing the mall. No one wins in that situation, especially the innocent lady checking out the latest range of cinnamons in the House of Spice a few stores down, so keep your cool. [More]

Shoppers Duke It Out Over Air Jordans

Shoppers Duke It Out Over Air Jordans

Although there may not have been a must-buy toy to cause a shopping frenzy this holiday season, a shoe managed to make adults behave like children. Police were called to various locations across the country to break up scuffles over the latest Nike Air Jordans. [More]

Nike Auctions Back To The Future Air Mag Shoes

Nike Auctions Back To The Future Air Mag Shoes

After years of rumors, Nike is finally selling a run of Back to The Future shoes. These Nike Air Mags are like the ones that Marty McFly put on in the movie and they laced themselves up. The shoes are going for a few thousand on eBay and all the proceeds benefit Parkinson’s research. Sadly, all they do is light up and look cool, they’re not self-tying. Which is why this guy, who has a working prototype of a self-lacing shoe, should have gotten a production run instead. [More]

Michael Vick Back On Nike's Endorsement Payroll

Michael Vick Back On Nike's Endorsement Payroll

After cutting ties with quarterback Michael Vick in 2007 following his involvement in a dogfighting ring, the shoe giant has apparently decided that Vick’s on-field performance has restored his good name enough to re-enlist him with an endorsement deal. [More]

Boston Mayor Calls Out Nike For "Get High" T-Shirts

Boston Mayor Calls Out Nike For "Get High" T-Shirts

Boston’s mayor has asked Nike to stop its use of questionable phrases on a line of new t-shirts. The phrases “get high,” “dope” and “ride pipe” all have double meanings pertaining to drugs, the mayor complains. An anti-drug group sent a similarly themed letter to several members of the White House Office of National Drug Control Policy. [More]

3 Wacky Tales From Our Crypt

3 Wacky Tales From Our Crypt

A selection of stories from our past archives with evergreen appeal, and aftertaste. We bring you horrific tales of The Hellraiser Sneaker, The Cellphone Call That Destroyed My Speakers, and I Bought A New Punching Bag That Turned Out To Be Stuffed With Dirty Underwear. [More]