Borders To Close 200 Bookstores

Borders To Close 200 Bookstores

Borders announced that 200 of their stores will be, in the words of their CEO, “right-sized” by January. The shredding focuses on Waldenbooks, Borders Express and Borders Outlet stores, mainly those in malls and airports. We kinda saw this coming.

Mall King And "Porky's" Producer Mel Simon Dead At 82

Mall King And "Porky's" Producer Mel Simon Dead At 82

Melvin Simon, founder of mega-mall operator Simon Property Group, died today at 82. While Simon is best known for running the largest mall operator in the U.S., with hundreds of properties nationwide, he made other — far more significant — contributions to America’s cultural landscape. And, no, we’re not talking about the Indiana Pacers, which he also owned. Simon was also a movie producer, and helped reinvent the teen sex comedy with “Porky’s,” the 1982 classic that introduced the world to the unique talents of Kim Cattrall and educated millions of young men about what not to do in the shower. We’ll remember you for that, Mel — not for flooding the nation with Hot Topics, Piercing Pagodas and A&Fs.

How Do You Tell Your Kid That The Sales Clerk Is A Big Phoney?

How Do You Tell Your Kid That The Sales Clerk Is A Big Phoney?

There’s a great post over on WiseBread by someone called the Frugal Duchess, about how her 10-year-old kid was schmoozed a little too successfully by a sales clerk at a tween clothing store in the mall.

Microsoft Retail Stores Prepare For Sensory Overload, Global Domination

Microsoft Retail Stores Prepare For Sensory Overload, Global Domination

This is old news to some of our readers, but not all: Microsoft is planning to open their own retail stores. What would such a wondrous place look like? Gizmodo has a concept Powerpoint presentation (what else?) that shows what the stores could look like.

Glamour Shots Now Does Boudoir Photography?

Glamour Shots Now Does Boudoir Photography?

Dallas writes, “Hey, I just saw this ad in on a local newspaper website. Glamour shots has apparently ‘changed.’ I guess they think there might be a market for people who will pay for nudie pics of themselves.”

Mayo Clinic: Coming Soon To The Mall Of America

Mayo Clinic: Coming Soon To The Mall Of America

(Photo: gwydionwilliams)

Target Advertises To Overhead Planes, Orbiting Satellites, Alien Life Forms

Target Advertises To Overhead Planes, Orbiting Satellites, Alien Life Forms

Joshua sent us this link to the Google Maps aerial view of a Target store in Alexandria, Va. There’s something to be said for branding, advertising, and taking advantage of unused space, but maybe a giant bulls-eye isn’t the logo to start with.

http://consumerist.com/2009/03/18/sprightly-old-people-rock-this/

Sprightly old people rock. This 78-year-old woman pursued and helped catch an armed robber in the parking lot of a mall on Long Island, NY. You can’t hide from old ladies in a PC Richard, purse snatchers of the world. [Newsday]

As The Recession Deepens, The Mall Of America Says It's Doing Fine

As The Recession Deepens, The Mall Of America Says It's Doing Fine

The New York Times says there are about 1,500 malls in the US and many of them are in trouble. They’re being converted to office buildings or closing their doors for good. And yet, Minnesota’s Mall of America is allegedly doing fine.

Proactiv Saleswoman Goes Insane When You Try To Return The Product

Proactiv Saleswoman Goes Insane When You Try To Return The Product

Amanda just had a frightening experience with the woman at the Proactiv kiosk in her hometown of Hattiesburg, Mississippi: “[Mall security] told me to come over and get away from her because she would not stop yelling, and refusing to do anything until I was out of her sight.” [Update: we’ve received more information on who to contact to resolve this issue. Check out the bottom of the post for details.]

Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory Gives You A Rotten Apple, Then Calls Security

Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory Gives You A Rotten Apple, Then Calls Security

Reader Nohreen says she bought an apple from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory and it turned out to be rotten inside. When she called the store to complain, they told her it wasn’t rotten, just brown from having been cut awhile ago. Nohreen said she’d bring the apple back to show them that it was actually rotten, but they told her not to waste her gas because there was nothing they could do about it. When she got to the store, rather than help her, she says the employees called security.

Smell Cookie, Spend Loosely

Smell Cookie, Spend Loosely

On a tight budget and using equal parts willpower and behavior self-modification? Stay away from the cookie places in the mall. The September 2008 issue of ShopSmart says studies show that even just catching a whiff of your favorite treat can increase your urge to splurge.

Mommy Needs A New Pair Of Stimulus Shoes

Mommy Needs A New Pair Of Stimulus Shoes

Upgrade: Travel Better blogger Mark Ashley sends in this ad he spotted at the Oak Hollow Mall in High Point North Carolina, exhorting shoppers to use their stimulus payments in a selfish splurge on depreciating assets.

Sharper Image Liquidating All Stores

Sharper Image Liquidating All Stores

Milfs Mortified By Urban Outfitters' Bawdry Books

Milfs Mortified By Urban Outfitters' Bawdry Books

Marci Milfs was appalled to see risque books being sold at her local Urban Outfitters store in Lynwood, Washington. According to The Herald, she was out clothes-shopping with her son when she came across the racy books. The titles included, “Pornogami: A Guide to the Ancient Art of Paper-Folding for Adults,” a how-to for making anatomically correct paper artwork and “Porn for Women,” a photo book showing men doing housework. Details, inside…

AT&T  Won't Sell You iPhone Because "You're Going To Unlock It"

AT&T Won't Sell You iPhone Because "You're Going To Unlock It"

Colin writes:

I went into my nearest ATT store and there were two CSR’s behind the counter- I asked for an 8gig Refurb iPhone thats being sold for $249 and the kid said sure and walked me over to the desk. The next words out of his mouth “What is your social security number?” No “How are you today?” “Thanks for coming in” No, apparently they just want my credit report to see if I am “worthy”

Dell Closing All U.S. Dell Direct Kiosks, Effective Immediately

Dell Closing All U.S. Dell Direct Kiosks, Effective Immediately

There was a rumor going around since last night that Dell was shuttering its 140 mall kiosks nationwide in another wave of belt-tightening. Now it’s official: “Dell Inc. will close its 140 kiosks in the U.S. as the computer maker is changing its retail strategy to sales in partnering stores.

Attention Shoppers: Please Report For Jury Duty

Attention Shoppers: Please Report For Jury Duty

A Vermont judge sent his sheriff to the mall to round up a jury that could fairly try a child molester.

They stopped passers-by and asked if they were residents of Caledonia County; a “yes” answer won a summons to appear at the courthouse for jury duty immediately, right now, this minute. They rounded up 45 people that way in all, to join the 34 already at the courthouse.